


Hello World

by JackMKaiser



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Drama, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Jack Whump, Jack-Centric
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-11
Updated: 2016-06-12
Packaged: 2018-07-14 08:11:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 28
Words: 75,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7161824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JackMKaiser/pseuds/JackMKaiser
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack pays the price when Sam tries to stop a rape off world, but is everything as it appears?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Hello World

Summary: Jack pays the price when Sam tries to stop a rape off world, but is everything what it appears to be?

Timeline: AU

Pairings: Jack/ Sam, Daniel/ Janet

Author's Notes: This is a fictional account of a traumatic brain injury. I am not a doctor. Despite doing exhaustive research, there are no doubt inaccuracies. Please forgive me and enjoy this as the fictional account that it is.

A special thank you to ScruffyLovin (My dear Evil Brain Twin), TamsHarley (My crazy twin from another mother, and my genius beta Kalinysta. This story wouldn't have been written had it not been for the three of you and I could never truly thank you enough.

This story is dedicated to all those who are suffering from a traumatic brain injury, their families, and caregivers. 

 

Monday, June 10, 2002

The dark clouds gathered in the western sky and thunder rumbled in the distance as the wind picked up speed. Lightning crackled, illuminating the dark sky, and the static in the air built up in epic proportions as the storm hit full force. Darkness closed in, the rain poured and the wind blew and the air, thick with despair, smelled of death.

Jack saw himself curled into a fetal position in the lush grass, naked and unable to move. His mind was working but he felt like a mummy wrapped in invisible bindings; his body was battered and covered in blood. How had he gotten like this? Where was everybody? He tried his damnedest to yell out for help but his body would not obey. His eyes, however, flashed towards his feet as he noticed something moving and he found Sam coming closer to him. He felt sickened as he saw her hands grasping a club. Slowly raising it over her head, she brought the club down on him hard then vanished like a wisp of smoke in the wind, and as Jack began to submit to oblivion, a thunderous voice began to speak.

“There you go. Your life, as it is now."

Jack bolted upright in his bed, his heart racing. Sweat covered his face and his breath came in short heavy gasps. His eyes darted around the dim room, trying to reorient himself. A sense of relief washed over him when he finally realized that he was still in his own bed, his beautiful wife still asleep at his side. He looked at the clock on his bedside table: 5:00 am. It would still be another two hours before he and Sam would head off for the Mountain to work. With a huff, he fell back on his bed, taking a few deep breaths to try and calm himself. A smile formed on lips as he looked over at his Sam and rolled onto his side to spoon behind her. His nerves were still rattled as he drank in the scent and feel of her. Despite the ghastly image of her in the dream, she made him feel safe. Without realizing it, Jack fell back into a light sleep.

“Jack, honey, it’s time to wake up, Andy's already having his breakfast, "Sam called out to him as she disappeared into the master bathroom. “Come on, sleepy head. We're gonna be late."

Jack yawned and sat up in the bed, the smell of fresh coffee filled his nostrils. With a good long stretch, he stood and made his way to the bathroom. After giving Sam a kiss, he turned on the shower to let the water warm up. Sam gave him a playful swat on his backside and scurried from the room.

“I'll get you back for that!" Jack called after her. Her only reply was a giggle.

After relieving himself, he shed his t-shirt and boxers and tossed them into the clothes hamper by the sink. He stepped into the shower and let the warm water run down his back, hoping that it would wash away the nervous tension caused by the nightmare. A few minutes and a thorough scrub-down later, he turned off the shower and stepped out. He grabbed a towel from the rack and dried himself off before wrapping the towel around his waist. After wiping the steam off of the mirror, he stared at his reflection for a few seconds before grabbing his shaving cream and razor. With a freshly shaved face and a clean body, he went back to his bedroom to dress.

It was seven-thirty by the time he sauntered down to the kitchen dressed in a long sleeved black shirt and khaki cargo pants to join his wife and son.

“Morning, Dad!" Andy shouted as he put his cereal bowl into the sink. “We’re gonna be late cause you sleeped in again!"

“Sorry. Mom should have woken me sooner than she did," Jack replied as he tousled his son's light brown hair, Andy had requested that his hair be cut like Jack's after his adoption was finalized two years ago and it had remained that way since.

“Andy, do you have your stuff ready to go to Aunt Janet's?" Sam asked as she rushed around the living room, gathering her stuff to leave. “Remember you have to go there for a few days while Dad and I go away."

“Yes, Mom. I put it in Dad's truck already," Andy told her.

“What about your backpack?" Sam asked, grabbing her laptop from the table by the front door.

“That too," Andy replied.

Jack couldn't help but smile at the domestic scene that had become his life over the last three years. He never thought that he could have such a happy life again after Charlie's death. His lonely miserable life had taken a turn toward greatness when he and Sam had got married, then got even better when they had adopted Andy. The little boy was only five years old when SG-1 had visited P4G-992 and found him hiding in a bush just outside of his village. The young child took an instant liking to Jack and since no living relatives could be found, they had taken him back to Earth with them, Andy wouldn't let anyone near him but Jack and Sam, so with General Hammond's help and blessing, Sam and Jack married and began the long process of adopting Andy. After nine long months of paperwork, he officially became their son, Andrew O'Neill. Life couldn't get any better than this.

“Hey! Time to go, "Sam said, poking Jack in the ribs and snapping him out of his thoughts. "Andy, get your jacket on."

Jack sat his half-empty cup of coffee in the sink and went to get his boots from the closet. He plopped down on the couch to put them on. With the last boot lace tied, he grabbed his coat and keys then followed his wife and son toward the door. When he started to pull the front door closed behind him, a sudden urge to take one last look around his house hit him. He felt like it would be the last time he'd see it again. With a silent snort, he headed out to his truck; something didn't feel right to him, but he couldn't put his finger on it.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

"Is it done?" an older man's voice asked in an anxious hush.

The young man looked around before holding the phone back up to his mouth. "Yes. I told you that I could do it."

"You're sure that no one saw you?"

"Positive."

"And nobody will be able to tell?"

"No, sir. I'm very good at what I do," the young man replied, impatiently tapping his fingers on the desk.

"You had better be, and it had better work," the older man said, his tone quickly turning angry. The young man's cocky tone was starting to grate on his nerves.

"It will. Trust me."

"We'll have to see about that," the older man snapped then slammed the phone back onto its cradle. He leaned back in his posh leather chair and propped his feet up on the desk. He picked up a pen and began to twirl it between his wrinkled fingers. Anger and relief drilled into his mind. Yes, he was going to be rid of a thorn in his side very soon, but it pissed him off that he had to rely on that arrogant little punk to do it.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

It was a typically quiet Monday morning at the SGC, the calm before the storm of activity when everyone was on base for duty. After changing into blue BDUs, Jack shuffled down the corridor toward the commissary to join Sam for breakfast. After dropping Andy off at school, they arrived at the SGC almost an hour ahead of schedule so they went their separate ways to attend some last minute things before they officially went on duty. When he entered the commissary, he walked over to the serving line and got a cup of coffee before making his way to a table in the far corner of the room to wait for Sam. His thoughts reverted back to the dream while he sipped at his coffee. What had brought the nightmare on? What happened to him? Why couldn't he shake it off? But one question kept popping up and by far it was the hardest one: why had Sam hurt him? He'd had more than his fair share of nightmares in his lifetime, but up until now he could easily push them aside. He started to wonder what Dr. Freud would have said to this one.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

After a nice breakfast with Sam, Jack made his way to his seldom used office. There was one more bit of important business he had to tend to before the briefing. Mentally, he gave himself a shake and sat down at his desk to get to work. The fact that his fingers actually worked in sync with his thoughts made him chuckle. It was as if they realized that this was important and needed to be done and done right. A few minutes later, it was finished and he clicked on the print icon, leaning back to relax while he waited for the document to print. He never felt so sure about anything as he did now, so without a second thought he pulled the document from the printer and scrawled his signature on it. Jack pulled another letter from his pocket and put the two of them into an envelope. He no sooner sealed the envelope and there was a hesitant tap on his door.

"Come in," Jack called out nervously as he shoved the envelope under his keyboard.

The door slowly opened and a short young man stepped in.

"Sergeant Yesnik. What can I do for you this fine May morning?" Jack regretted that the moment the words escaped his lips. He wondered if he could possibly sound any more ridiculous.

"Sorry to bother you, Sir. I just wanted to give you the file for your mission briefing so you could give it a quick look before it starts," Sargeant Yesnik said quietly, his deep green eyes squinting to adjust to the dimness of the room.

"Thank you, Sergeant," Jack replied as he took the folder.

"Is there anything I can get you, Sir?" Yesnik asked timidly, nervously running his hand through his slick black hair.

"Uh, no I'm good, but thanks," Jack replied, silently wishing that the young man would just go away.

"Okay. If you need anything, let me know," Yesnik replied seemingly disappointed. He gave Jack a sharp salute and left, pulling the door closed behind him.

'O-kay. That was odd,' Jack thought. Though as he thought about it, it was pretty typical of him. Marine Sergeant Dean Yesnik had come to work at the SGC three months ago as a computer tech. From the start he seemed to take an instant liking to Jack and was always eager to please him. Daniel called it hero worship once. Sam thought it was “cute”. Teal'c just raised an eyebrow every time Yesnik tried to make an impression on Jack, and Jack-he just thought that it was flat-out annoying. Jack didn't know much about the young man other than he was smart and damned good with computers.

About a month after Yesnik's arrival at the SGC, Hammond called Jack into his office and informed him in no uncertain terms that Washington was tired of Jack not getting his memos and his mission reports being late. So in their infinite wisdom, Washington ordered Hammond to assign Jack an assistant from the list of acceptable candidates they had sent along with the order. Sergeant Dean Yesnik was number four on the list and Hammond had selected him. Good old George thought that it would be a perfect match since Yesnik was a computer whiz and the young man had seemed to take a liking to a certain Colonel almost immediately. Something about that made Hammond snicker, but the humor of it totally escaped Jack. So for the past two months, if Jack got a memo, Yesnik was there; if there was a mission report to be written, Yesnik was there.

After Yesnik was gone Jack pulled the envelope out and scrawled General Hammond’s name on the front. He propped it up against the computer screen before he stood to leave. His slender hand grasped the door handle and began to turn it when that 'take one last look, Jack' feeling came over him again. He wondered what the hell that was all about. Was he finally going over the deep end? Now he was irritated with himself and he felt a headache coming on.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

SG-1 along with General Hammond sat around the table in the briefing room going over SG-1's next mission to P4C-509. After the initial 'The next planet on the mission list..' from Hammond, Carter stood and told about the initial MALP data on the planet. Despite the flaring headache beginning to rage in his head, Jack watched and actually listened to her. A slight grin appeared on his lips when she launched into a speech about the planet's atmosphere being like that on Earth without the pollution, then tell about the planet's two suns that combined to make green sunlight and how it would be safe for them to go there. He tried hard to suppress the groan of dread from escaping his lips when Sam finished and Daniel stood to do his spiel on the archaeological aspects of the mission. Hammond glared at Jack and then nodded to Daniel to begin.

“The data from the MALP showed an altar-like structure near the gate on P4C-509. There are carvings on the altar that maybe be some sort of ancient writing. Now I can't tell for sure, but the carvings seem to be similar to the writings associated with the Ancients," Daniel said, trying hard to contain his excitement to visit the planet.

Jack yawned as Daniel prattled on. All his talk about 'possibly Latin this' and 'resembling Greek that' was beginning to make Jack's headache blossom to a whole new level. His mind drifted back to that dream. The uneasy feeling about it increased the more Daniel spoke. After twenty more minutes of listening to it, Jack had had enough.

"Daniel, will you be getting to a point any time soon?" Jack didn't try at all to hide the fact that he was irritated.

"Yes, Jack. I am," Daniel shot him an annoyed glare. "I think it would be beneficial to go to P4C-509 and see exactly what these writings are. There is a possibility that this is another world that the Ancients may have visited at some point."

"Is there any indigenous life there?" General Hammond asked.

“Yes, sir. According to the UAV there is a city about a mile away from the gate," Sam answered.

“Do you think they pose a threat?" Hammond’s voice had an air of concern.

“I don't think so, Sir. According to the readout from the UAV there was no advanced technology detected and from what we could see from the aerial picture, the people aren't nearly as advanced as we are," Sam responded.

“Major O'Neill, did the MALP give any indication of what sort of mineral deposits were detected?" General Hammond asked without lifting his eyes from the paper that had the MALP report on it.

“According to the data the mineral has similar properties as naquadah with a slight variation. It appears that there is an abundance of it on the planet, Sir."

“Alright, you have a go. Since Washington has been on us about getting more materials for the amount of times we go through the gate, I'll give you three days. Be ready at 1300 to deploy. Dismissed," Hammond ordered. "Oh and people, I want a report every twenty-four hours."

Jack's uneasy feeling intensified when Hammond gave the order; he'd hoped that Hammond wouldn't approve the mission. Something told him that he should just go the hell home.

"O'Neill, are you not well?" Teal'c asked as he cocked his eyebrow.

"I'm fine, Teal'c," Jack replied as he snapped himself out of his thoughts. He didn't notice that Teal'c had stopped in the doorway to wait for him.

"You seem troubled, O'Neill."

"Eh. I just got a weird feeling about this mission is all."

"Do you not think that we should visit this planet ?"

"I don't know," Jack said as he shook his head dismissively. "Let's grab lunch."

Something told him that it was a bad idea to go on this mission. He knew that they had come to trust him on his hunches, but he couldn't let a bad dream get in the way of his job or theirs. Sam was too excited of the possibility of the amount of naquadah that there might be on the planet and old Danny boy was chomping at the bit to get a look at that altar type thingy by the gate. Besides, if he was questioning his sanity over this, what would they think?

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack poked at the remains of his turkey sandwich, not much in the mood for eating. Lost in thought, he took a sip of coffee and put the cup back down. He kept his eyes on the table, totally blocking out the conversation between his team mates about their upcoming mission.

Daniel's voice startled him back to reality, though. "Are you okay, Jack?"

"Huh?" Jack broke out of his thoughts and raised his head to see Daniel eying him with concern. "Yes, Daniel, I'm okay, "Jack replied.

"You don't seem okay, "Daniel said as he sat his fork down beside his plate.

"I was just thinking is all, "Jack told him. He contemplated telling them about his dream and the bad feeling it gave him, but, after yesterday,how could he look at his wife and tell her that she'd clubbed him to death in a dream? It was at that moment that he realized that he' d been avoiding her all day.

"Wow. You thinking? Kinda scary?" Daniel ribbed.

"Ha ha. So NOT funny, Daniel," Jack groused. "It's just that I-"

"Just that I what, Colonel?" Sam prodded then gave him a playful grin.

"I just have... Never mind," Really not wanting to continue this conversation and a bit miffed at himself for opening his big mouth, he glanced at his watch. "Alright, kids. Thirty minutes till we move out. Go get yourselves ready."

Before anyone had a chance to respond, Jack stood up and hurried out of the room.

"Jack! Wait!" Sam called after him.

Jack stopped dead in his tracks and waited for her to catch up.

“What were you going to say back there?" Sam puffed out when she finally caught up to him.

"Nothing important, "he responded in his best 'I'm so innocent' voice. He started walking with her by his side.

"Jack, what's wrong? You've haven't been acting right all morning."

"Nothing's wrong. I'm just a little tired. I had a VERY long night," he said before giving her the famous Jack O' Neill grin that could make any female's heart melt like butter.

Sam's cheeks turned a bright shade of crimson and she slapped him playfully on the arm. With a wink and another grin, he pressed a quick kiss to her lips and raced off to the locker room. After he had changed, he headed out toward the gateroom. He wanted to stop by the infirmary once more to give Janet a message to give to Andy when she went picked him up from school. A quick note to say that he loved him and would see him in three days with a P.S. to be a good boy for Janet and Cassie.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

"Chevron seven, locked," Walter's voice echoed throughout the gate room before the loud whoosh of the gate activation.

"Alright, kids. Let's get this over with," Jack said, dismayed that his uneasiness showed in his voice. Silently wishing that he could just stay put, Jack took point and SG-1 made their way up the ramp to the Stargate. In the control room, Sargeant Yesnik stood beside Hammond and nervously chewed on his lip as they watched SG-1 disappear through the event horizon.

 


	2. Chapter 2

The planet was much like Earth, the obvious exception being the yellow and blue suns that cast an eerie green glow across the land. The trees were dark brown with leaves that looked like slivers of emerald stones, and a path of orange dirt led from the Stargate in to the woods. Jack tilted his head to the side in wonderment of the odd landscape as he looked out over the open field that surrounded the Stargate. Daniel made like a kid running for the gifts under a Christmas tree as he bolted toward the structure with the writing on it. He whipped his camera out of his sack and began taking snapshots of the altar. Teal'c walked around the perimeter while Sam pulled out her kit to test the soil around the Stargate. Once everyone was busy doing something, Jack looked around. He fought to keep his mind on the mission and alert to any possible danger. Right at this moment, the boredom seemed more of a threat to him than the residual paranoia from the dream. The fact that his gaze kept drifting to Sam helped him to stay awake and happy. He let the kids play for three more hours before enough was enough. He needed to get moving and work off the tension that seemed to be building again.

"Come on, Danny Boy, you can play with that later," Jack announced then paused to look at his watch. "Okay, kids. We' re off to see the wizard."

Daniel rolled his eyes as they began to walk in the direction of the town. With their minds on the mission at hand, no one noticed a figure lurking in the shadows watching them.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Nearing the town Jack felt goosebumps form; he couldn't help feeling that someone was watching them. Something was definitely off. Jack's eyes darted around, his grip tightened on his P90. Birds chirped in the trees as a cool breeze blew. The smells of baking bread and smoking meat tickled their noses as they turned a bend in the road and a shanty town came into view. The people stared intently at them as they walked toward the gate to the main town, speaking in hushed voices as SG-1 passed them. Jack could feel the hairs standing on the back of his neck. It seemed to him that they knew something was going to happen, like they were confirming his feeling.

'Damn it, Jack! Enough with the paranoid crap already,' he thought to himself as they approached the city gate .

"Sam, do all these people look alike to you?" Jack asked when he noticed that the only difference between the people was their clothing and their gender. All had jet black hair, deep green eyes, and dark olive skin. It was almost as if some Greek statues had come alive and escaped the museum. Well, the pointy ears did make a big difference.

"Yes, sir, they do," she replied then smiled.

"Okay, just checking," Jack said with a straight face before rubbing his fingerless gloved hands over his eyes and then replaced his sunglasses without missing a step.

"Daniel, how do we get in?" Jack asked with his face scrunched up in a questioning expression when they at last approached the city gate. The metal gate stood about 16 feet high with a stone pillar on either side of it. A stack stone wall encompassed the city like arms in a protective embrace.

As if in answer to his query, a large man dressed in attire resembling an ancient Greek soldier stepped out from behind the stone pillar at the left of the metal gate. The green glow from the suns reflected harshly off of his gold helmet and breastplate.

"Uh-hello. We are peaceful explorers from Earth. We'd like to visit your city, "Daniel said, his voice sounded as nervous as Jack felt.

Giving the visitors a disapproving look, the guard opened the gate so they could enter. When they were through, he slammed it shut with a resounding clang, causing the group to jump.

"Follow me," the guard growled.

"Friendly sort of fellow isn't he?" Jack whispered to Teal'c as they began to walk toward the Center of town. Teal'c cocked an eyebrow and nodded. Jack slowed slightly and fell into step with Daniel. "Daniel, what kind of people do you think they are?"

"The buildings resemble ancient Roman architecture, but, the clothing looks similar to what the Greeks wore, "Daniel replied as he studied the city, snapping pictures as they went.

"In other words you don't have a clue," Jack said with his face bearing his best sarcastic expression.

"No, Jack, I don't," Daniel looked at Jack with irritation.

"Sir," Sam said nodding toward the building looming before them. "We're here."

Jack looked up to see that they were at a palace situated in the Center of the city. The guard pulled on a thick satin chord hanging by the massive wooden door, a gong-type noise echoed from the other side. Within a few minutes they heard the sound of a thick slab of wood sliding and the door began to open. They followed the guard down a long corridor. Daniel snapped pictures of the paintings that lined the walls of the corridor, quickly studying each one while keeping up with the others. Maybe he'd be able to learn about their culture from the pictures. Daniel quickened his step to catch up to Jack.

"These paintings depict different religious and judicial ceremonies," Daniel whispered to Jack.

"Silence!" The guard barked as they made a right turn into what appeared to be a throne room.

The guard walked with his eyes to the ground, turning his head toward SG-1 as if to tell them to do the same. Jack waved his hand at them to do so as they approached the large golden chair situated against the far side of the room. The guard lifted his hand to halt them and continued up to the throne.

"My Lord, these visitors request your audience," He spoke quietly yet his voice still echoed off of the walls. "They say they wish to learn of us, my Lord."

"Thank you, Thanatos. You may stand," The Emperor turned his attention to SG-1 as Thanatos stood and moved off to the side. "Which of you is the leader?"

"I am," Jack answered as he looked up at the man.

"Step forward and state your identity," the Emperor ordered.

"Colonel Jack O' Neill, U.S. Air Force," Jack looked up at the tall man in the throne with his signature grin. The darkness of the man's features was accentuated by the ornate crown of golden olive branches and leaves that sat upon his jet black hair.

"I am Panos, emperor of Tritaria. What truly is your business here?" His blue-green eyes studied Jack intently.

"We would like to learn about your culture and become friends," Jack said as he turned a glance at Daniel. Daniel gave him an approving nod.

"What land are you from?" Panos asked, his face twisted in a look of distrust and curiosity.

"We come from the planet Earth," Jack answered.

Panos sat bolt upright at Jack's answer, fear and anger blazed in his eyes. "You came through the Abyssus Porta?"

Jack turned to Daniel with a confused look on his face.

"It's Latin for Hell's Gateway. I think he's referring to the Stargate," Daniel whispered to Jack.

"Uh, yeah. We came through the Stargate," Jack replied as he turned to face Panos.

"Get away from my city! Return to Hell and bother us no more!" Panos bellowed. His body trembled with fear and anger.

"O-kay," Jack turned back to his team mates. "Let's go kids."

"No! Please wait," Daniel pleaded, “We would really like to learn about your culture and become friends."

"Only evil comes through the Abyssus Porta and we want no such alliance!" Panos growled.

They turned to exit the palace, looking at each other in total shock at Panos' reaction.

"What was that about, Daniel?" Jack asked as they stepped out into the street.

"I'm not really sure. It seems like they think that only bad things come out of the Stargate," Daniel answered.

"Perhaps the Goa'uld have once been here," Teal'c suggested.

"Those damned snake heads ruin everything," Jack muttered sarcastically as he shook his head.

With that they started down the cobblestone street to the city gate. The streets were quiet, everyone they passed turned away from them as though they had the plague. That annoying nervous feeling returned to Jack at full force causing the hairs to stand up on the back of his neck. An overwhelming feeling to get the hell out of there made him quicken his pace. All of a sudden a scream pierced the silence causing them to stop dead in their tracks, looking around to discover the source.

 

"It sounds like it came from that chapel over there, "Sam said, pointing to a cathedral-type building across the street.

They walked over to the chapel, stopping at the open door and peering inside. What they saw shocked them. A young woman lay naked on an ornate gold altar at the far end of the room with her arms chained above her head, her legs bent at the knee with her ankles manacled. Her eyes were wide in fear and wet from the tears that poured from them. Men in light blue togas surrounded her, chanting quietly as they began to disrobe. Once again the woman screamed as one of the men climbed up on the altar and positioned himself between her spread legs, stopping just short of entering her to mutter more words to the chant. Sam, abhorred by what she was seeing, took a step forward to stop the man. Jack grabbed her vest to stop her.

"Sir, we have to stop them. They're going to rape her!" Sam whispered in an angry voice.

Jack wrinkled his face in thought, he looked at Daniel. "Daniel, any idea what's going on here?"

"Possibly a religious ceremony. It sounds like they are chanting a prayer, "Daniel replied quietly.

"Sam, you heard what Daniel said. Look, I don't like this either, but we can't interfere in another society," Jack swallowed hard, there were times he hated his job and this was definitely one of them.

"I'm sorry, sir, but, I can't walk away and let this happen," Sam said then stepped one foot into the doorway.

Jack grabbed her arm to stop her. The sickening feeling returned, telling him to stick by his original order and leave. She was right, he could not in all good conscience allow a young girl to be raped religious ceremony or not. It's not like he never broke the rules before. Hell, he did it so many times that he lost count. He looked toward the young girl, her body was shaking with sobs and her eyes wide with fear. He made up his mind to intervene, but before he could do anything Sam reacted.

"Stop!" Sam yelled as the man began to enter the woman.

The men stopped and glared at her as the woman breathed a heavy sigh of relief.

"How dare you interrupt the Ritus of Virtus!" The oldest man admonished, his voice wavering with anger.

"Damn it, Sam," Jack muttered as he walked to where Sam stood. He looked to the man that yelled. "Sorry about this, folks. Just a minor misunderstanding. We'll be on our way now."

"You will go nowhere! Falyle, get the guards!" The man ordered.

"Yes, Baneu, I shall obey," Falyle acknowledged, quickly putting his robe back on. With a slight bow he turned and ran out of the chapel.

'Oh, this is so not gonna be good' Jack thought to himself as he swallowed hard.

"No. Please. Wait. Th-this is a mistake. W-we didn't know that you were performing a ceremony," Daniel begged, quickly trying to rectify the problem.

"Silence!" Baneu barked, raising his hand to hit Daniel.

Jack stepped in front of Daniel and put his hands up. "Hey! Now let's play nice."

Baneu glared at Jack before slamming his fist into Jack's stomach, then bringing his knee up into his right eye when he doubled over in pain.

"Stop! Please. I'm sorry," Sam pleaded.

Before Baneu had time to respond, Falyle returned, flanked by six guards that were armed with swords. Baneu picked his toga up off of the floor, putting it on as he made his way up to the guards.

"Arrest these heretics!" he ordered, pointing at SG-1. The guards rushed at them, grabbing them by their arms and disarming them. Within minutes they were roughly dragged from the chapel.

"Well. So much for 'Welcome to our town', " Jack said, still reeling from the blows he received.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

The air outside had a static feel to it, gray clouds formed in the sky and the wind was picking up. The dream flooded back into Jack's mind causing him to slow and his to stomach to churn. The guard that had a hold of him yanked at his arm causing him to lose his balance. A grunt escaped his lips as pain shot through his foot when it twisted to the side. The crowd that had gathered outside pointed and whispered at the strangers as they were dragged toward the castle. Upon arrival, they were ushered in a not-so-friendly way into a room right inside the entrance. The guard that 'escorted' Jack took his meaty hand and dug into the back of Jack's neck then shoved him down to his knees in front of what appeared to be a judge's bench, causing him to yelp in pain.

"So, Daniel, what happens next?" Jack asked.

"I don't know, Jack," Daniel replied nervously.

"It appears that we are in some trouble, O'Neill," Teal'c offered in an attempt at a joke.

"Ya think?" Jack narrowed his eyes at the Jaffa. "Daniel, what was that Rubic's cube thing?"

"Ritus of Virtus," Daniel corrected. "It is Latin for the Rite of Manhood. From what I have gathered from the paintings in the hallway, the culture is somewhat modeled like the ancient Greeks on Earth."

"And that means... what exactly ?" Jack quipped.

"The religious teacher of the temple would choose a virgin from the city. After performing a prayer ritual to prepare her, he and his students would have sex with her. It was required for the students to be considered men in society. The ceremony could only be performed during certain times of the year after the students finished their training," Daniel took his glasses off and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"So when can they do it again?" Sam asked worriedly.

"Without knowing the moon cycles on this planet I can't say for sure," Daniel replied in obvious frustration.

Jack sighed heavily and rolled his eyes. "So, we're in trouble?"

"Yes, Jack, we're in trouble," Daniel responded in a quiet voice.

A loud clang caused SG-1 to jump to their feet as the main door of corridor opened. A large man dressed in an elaborate red tunic approached and took his place behind the bench, glaring at them with a disgusted look on his pudgy face.

"I am Inquisitor Aceaus, which of you is the leader O'Neill?" His voice came as a deep bellow through his thick, twisted lips.

"Uh, that would be me. Something I can help you with?" Jack replied in his usual sarcastic tone.

The man's face contorted in anger then reddened into a near crimson shade. "You are suspected of heresy and crimes against the faith. At the morrow you shall face the Tribunal and answer for your crimes," He turned to the guards and shouted, "Retrieve him!"

"Uh, I don't think so," Jack said backing up when the two men approached him.

Before anyone could react, the taller guard brought a heavy fist upside Jack's face. A grunt of pain escaped Jack's lips before he slumped into an unconscious heap. A trickle of blood ran from Jack's bottom lip as the remainder of SG-1 stepped forward to help him.

"Stop!" Aceaus yelled holding up his meaty hand. "You will only succeed in adding more charges against him," Looking up at the remaining guards he belted out more orders. "Take these to the cells."

Not knowing what was already in store for Jack, they stopped, watching silently as Aceaus and the guards dragged Jack down the corridor out of their sight. The remaining guards grabbed Sam, Teal'c, and Daniel and took them out of the room to the dungeons beneath the palace. As they walked, they kept an eye out for any sign of Jack, wondering where he had been taken and what was happening to him. The only thing that gave any sign that he had been there was the two squiggly lines in the dirt from the toes of his boots as he had been dragged away to a fate known only to God Himself.


	3. Chapter 3

The dungeon was cold and dimly lit, and a heavy stench of sweat and body waste hung in the air. Cells filled with wretched souls lined both sides of the corridor. Rat-like creatures scurried along the slimy stone walls and burrowed into the small mounds of hay that were scattered around the stone floors. They were led to a cell halfway down the right side of the corridor and they were thrown into one of them, landing hard on the floor. The iron bars slammed closed with a sickening clang and the guards walked away.

"Daniel, what's going on?" Sam asked.

"Apparently Jack is being charged with what happened in the chapel," Daniel answered as he leaned on the bars trying desperately to hear where they took Jack.

"But, that was all my fault! I'm the one that interrupted that ceremony," Sam protested, tears welling in her eyes.

"It does not appear to be relevant, Major O'Neill," Teal'c replied.

Sam swallowed hard as she slumped down in the far corner of the cell, her legs pulled up to her chest and tears streaming down her cheeks. She began to rock back and forth as she thought about what was happening to her husband and their son waiting at home for them. How would she even begin to tell him that she had got his father killed because she couldn't control her temper?

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack began to come around as they entered a large cell. The overwhelming foul smell made his stomach churn, and he swallowed hard to keep from vomiting. Torches were perched in each corner of the room, hay stained with dried blood and body waste scattered on the stone floor. A long wooden table sat in the Center of the room with a smaller one with different things laid on top of it sitting off to the side of it. A lump formed in his throat when he realized that he had been taken into a torture chamber. Jack looked up to see Aceaus stop at the far end of the cell near two shackles hanging from the ceiling and motion for the guards to bring Jack closer to him.

"Put him in his chains. Remove his cloak and foot coverings!" Aceaus ordered the guards.

Jack put up a hell of a fight against the two men only to find they were stronger than he had thought. They pummeled him with their fists and feet until he went limp before they roughly removed his coat and boots then yanked his arms up into the shackles. When they had finished the guards tossed his belongings into a heap on the floor and took their place at the door.

"Here you will remain until the morrow when you face the Tribunal and answer for your transgressions," Aceaus barked in Jack's face.

"Hey, say it, don't spray it," Jack quipped as he wiped the droplets of Aceaus spittle from his face with his arm. "I take it that you folks never heard of breath mints either."

"You worthless heretic! How dare you speak to me that way?" Aceaus trembled with rage, glaring at Jack as if willing his head to explode. He balled his thick hand into a fist, striking Jack in the head. He was so filled with rage that he didn't notice the young woman that crept into the cell until he turned away from Jack.

"Eilenas! Remove the heretic's possessions and take them to be burned," Aceaus ordered without breaking the angry glare that he held on Jack.

Eilenas timidly walked toward Jack and with shaking hands she reached in his pockets, putting whatever she took out into a pouch attached to her long skirt. After Jack's pockets were empty she turned and picked up his jacket and boots.

"Go and do as you have been bidden!" Aceaus barked cruelly. She curtsied to Aceaus before hurriedly leaving the cell. When she was gone Aceaus then strutted over to Jack.

"What if my nose gets itchy?" Jack said in his best insubordinate voice, looking Aceaus straight in the eyes.

Aceaus trembled with fury as he lifted his thick hand and backhanded Jack in the nose causing a trickle of blood to flow from Jack's nostril. "You will learn respect, heretic!" Aceaus took his place near the door and nodded to the two guards, menacing expressions spread across their deep olive faces.

Jack took a deep breath as the guards approached in a desperate attempt to brace himself for the beating that he knew was coming. A blow to his ribs had released a scream of pain from deep down causing Jack to hate himself for allowing that fat son of a bitch the pleasure of hearing him scream. The guards' heavy fists made contact with just about every square inch of Jack's body for the next ten minutes until a nod from Aceaus finally stopped the beating. The guards nodded in acknowledgment then made their way to the door. A look of pride formed on Aceaus face before he turned and followed the men out of the room.

Jack hung there gasping for breath and praying for the darkness to take him to the place where there was no pain. Torture wasn't a new concept to him, but no matter how many times he had been through it, it never got easier. It wasn't that hard to figure out that this was only the beginning.

"Sam," Jack whispered as unconsciousness finally took him.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sam sat in the dark corner of the cell, staring across at Daniel and Teal'c. They had not spoken to each other since Jack had been taken away. She could tell that they were angry. With her? She didn't know. She couldn't blame them if they were. She was angry at herself. How could they not be? How could she not be? She had just let her temper get the better of her and now Jack was paying the price for it. Why the hell couldn't she just keep her damned mouth shut? Jack was right; it was none of their business, right or wrong. A terrifying scream broke the silence making the trio jump and run up to the bars of the cell. No one said a word. They all knew it was Jack.

Tuesday, June 11, 2002-Day 2 on Tritaria

The next morning Jack’s arms were numb from hanging all night and his head was thumping as if there were a hundred piece drum corps in there having a concert. Dear God he was tired, but sleep was a commodity that he was not allowed. Even when he would nestle his pounding head into a comfortable spot on his arm, a guard would come by and hit him awake. The rumbling in his stomach had stopped. It was as though it realized that it would not be filled anytime soon.

Eilenas returned to Jack's cell carrying a large clay bowl of water and a rag. She made her way to the smaller table near where Jack was hanging. After depositing the bowl on the table she took the rag and soaked it in the water. She whispered a prayer as she began to wipe the cloth across Jack's face. He wriggled and groaned when the cloth touched the fresh wounds that Aceaus had inflicted just before dawn. Jack barely heard her murmured apologies.

"Who are you?" Jack asked, his voice raspy from thirst and pain.

"I am your frailes, Eilenas. It is my solemn duty to attend thee during Tribunal," she replied in a low voice.

"Well, I don't need to be attended unless ya plan to let me go."

"I cannot. I must clean you for your appearance at the Tribunal," she replied quietly.

"Tribunal? What is that?" Jack asked through his clenched teeth. The fresh cuts screamed every time the cloth touched them.

"It is where you will answer for your crimes in front of the members of the Tribunal, "  
"I knew that, but who are they?"

“The Listeners, who will hear the case against you. The Judges will decide whether or not you are guilty. The Choosers decide what punishment will befall you," she explained as she finished washing him. Though she didn't look at his face she could sense the confusion and his bewilderment. "Each has three members."

"How long will all of this take?" Jack asked.

"There is no way to know for certain," Eilenas responded quietly.

She wrung out the cloth and laid it on the table while Jack grumbled to himself. His eyes followed her to the corner of the cell where she dumped the bowl of dirty water. It hadn't hit him how thirsty he was until that moment.

"Could you please give me a drink of water?" Jack pleaded.

"That I can. I shall return with it," she said quietly then picked up the cloth and bowl and walked out of the cell.

She returned a few minutes later with a small metal cup of cold water, gently lifting it to his lips for him to drink. Jack savored it, relishing the coolness of it running down his parched throat. When he had finished she dumped what little was left where she had early emptied the bowl.

"Please, tell no one. You are not to be given such aid," she implored. He nodded and gave her a small smile. With a timid curtsy she left the cell.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Shortly after the bright green sunlight broke through the barred window of the cell, the hunched back man returned with a tray of food, and in his usual fashion, he deposited it on the stone floor and scurried away. Daniel picked up the tray and brought it to the Center of the cell. He divvied it up as Teal'c and Sam came to join him.

"Have you been able to ascertain anything about these people, Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c asked when Daniel handed him his share of what resembled scrambled eggs and flatbread.

"Well, from what I can tell they appear to be like the ancient Greeks of Earth. Going by what the Inquisitor said yesterday, they are apparently in the middle of a witch hysteria or something like it," Daniel replied.

"How does this upset witch affect what is going on with O' Neill?" Teal'c inquired.

Daniel and Sam looked at each other. Had it been under better circumstances they would have laughed at the way Teal'c worded the question.

"The witch hysteria was a period of time when devoutly religious people felt threatened by people who didn't share their faith. They assumed that they were witches and against God. Trials were held and in the majority of the cases the people were found guilty of heresy then tortured and executed in the name of God," Daniel's voice wavered as he spoke. 

His words rang in their ears, the seriousness of the situation had hit them hard. Appetites quickly disappeared and the food was forgotten.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Tribunal Hall was a grand room with red velvet carpet covering the floor and gold ornate trim on the white walls. Three lavishly decorated tables with three gold framed chairs at each sat at the head of the room. Dead center stage just in front of the tables was a rough wooden table with dark splotches all over it, and hanging above it was a set of shackles with a matching set on the floor below, a veritable torture theater for high society to get their jollies while another suffered. The rear of the hall was filled with what was apparently the affluent of the city, who were all chatting quietly. It smelled of death and pain. Sam, Teal'c, and Daniel were made to kneel on one of the red cushioned benches in the rear of the room as they watched as nine men dressed in red tunics walked into the room and took their seats at the tables. A bell sounded as Emperor Panos entered followed by Aceaus and Thanatos. They sat in the two big throne-type chairs which were positioned on a small platform behind the tables. Thanatos stood in between the chairs like a statue. The shrill clanging of the bell continued until they took their seats behind the three tables of the Tribunes, at which time a nerve wracking silence spread throughout the spectators.

"Bring in the accused!" Inquisitor Aceaus bellowed, his theatrical display made it clear that he was the one running the show.

A collective gasp came from Daniel, Teal'c, and Sam as Jack was dragged into the hall, his face bruised and bloody. Sam's breath caught in her throat when her eyes met Jack's, silently exchanging comfort. They watched in sadness as he was dragged to a hard wooden bench in front of the first table. A heavy grunt of pain flowed from Jack as he was forced to kneel down on a board with large spikes sticking out of it. Sam bit her lip to keep herself from crying out to him.

Aceaus strutted up to the main podium as though he were a proud peacock with its feathers on display, clutched in his hand was a scroll. "The accused has been charged with heresy and crimes against the faith, being in due service to the Diabolus and his followers," Aceaus's voice echoed off the walls.

Jack sat in a haze of fatigue, the words being spoken went in one ear and out the other. He was so tired and so sore. 'A night of no sleep and an occasional slap session with the big guy makes Jack a space case,' Jack thought to himself as he just stared ahead, struggling to keep awake and biting back the pain that engulfed him. A thump in the back of his head from a nearby guard snapped him to attention. "Ah, what?" Jack snapped as he tried to rub the newest source of pain.

"Answer, heretic!" the guard ordered as he planted another fist into the side of Jack's head.

It took Jack a few seconds to recover and cast a dazed glance at the guard; he'd spaced out and had no clue as to what he was to answer.

"Do you swear that you will only state the truth throughout these proceedings and those held in the future?" Aceaus spat angrily at Jack.

"Yeah. Whatever," Jack responded still without much of a clue as to what was going on.

"Declare your name, age, birthplace, and occupation," Aceaus ordered Jack.

"My name is Homer Simpson. I was born in Springfield..."

Jack was interrupted by yet another fist to his head from the guard, ordered by a furious glare from Aceaus. Jack could almost hear Daniel yelling at him to stop being an ass, which was a pleasant thought to help get past the pain.

"I strongly adjure thee to speak truthfully in the names of our goddesses, heretic. For if not you will only be further damning yourself," Aceaus’s voice seared into Jack's ears, echoing through his already throbbing head.

Jack turned his eyes toward his team, taking in the pleading look in their eyes, pleading with him to be serious once in his life and not bring more pain upon himself. He wanted to wrap his arms around Sam and tell her that it would be alright, but he knew that no matter what, he was screwed. So, there and then he decided to be a good little boy and hope to God that his team would be safe.

"Colonel Jack O' Neill, United States Air Force, 49 years old, born in Chicago, Illinois," Jack spoke with his head down.

"Hast thou been baptized?"

"Yes."

"Hast thou been faithful to the prayers and rites that goes with such ceremony?"

Jack was quiet. He believed that God existed and though he didn't pray regularly, he still did it. He didn't go to church every Sunday. Okay, it may be better just to shut up and let whatever is going to happen, happen. Jack let his eyes wander to Aceaus and just as he suspected the rat bastard sneered at him. Apparently Jack's lack of an answer was what he'd wanted.

"You are hereby charged with crimes against the faith, heresy, being in league with and in service of the Diabolus," Aceaus said as glared at Jack. "How doth thou answer to these charges?"

"I haven't done anything wrong! I'm not in league with anyone," Jack defended, anger building. He wasn't exactly keen on being called names and being accused of doing something he didn't do by a hypocritical piece of shit.

Aceaus turned his glance to Baneu and continued in a more polite tone and demeanor. "The accuser will now state his case."

Baneu, the older man from the chapel, stepped up to the front of the Listener's table in a fancy light blue toga and bowed to them. His short black hair glistened in the light of the grand room. He spoke eloquently and flung his hands around as he told about the events in the chapel, adding a few of his own extra details, of course. When he had finished, Baneu bowed to the Listeners and glared at Jack with an evil glint in his eyes before retaking his place in the spectator gallery.

"What say thee?" Aceaus asked Jack, his voice digging into Jack's aching skull like railroad spikes.

"It didn't happen that way. I thought I was stopping a rape, which on our world is against the law. I didn't realize at the time that it was a ceremony. The only thing that I said was that I was sorry and that we would leave," Jack replied, naturally taking all the blame to save his team.

"So you admit that you are responsible for interrupting the ceremony?"

"Yes, but not intentionally. Had I known it was a religious ceremony we would have kept on our way," Jack swallowed hard, knowing that he'd just damned himself. Better him than his team. "I only wanted to help the girl when I thought that she was in trouble. ”

There was whispering among the spectator gallery as well as the members of the Tribunal. Daniel swallowed hard. It was their second day on the planet and his best friend was on trial for his life over a simple misunderstanding.

Aceaus launched into another sermon about Jack's guilt for the next three more hours, but to Jack it felt like forever. His head was pounding like a hundred piece marching band had moved into it, and pain flared in his knees from the position that he'd been forced into. His body screamed for him to lay down. He spaced out again, until a short statement brought him into the here and now faster than a speeding train.

Aceaus cast an angry glare in Jack's direction. "We shall examine the heretic for marks of the Diabolus."

SG-1 let out a collective gasp of shock while the spectators cooed with excitement. Daniel felt the overwhelming urge to vomit as he knew exactly what this examination entailed. Jack looked pleadingly at Daniel as the guards grabbed him by his arms and dragged him toward the set of shackles in the front of the hall.

"I know of you and the woman. So if you do not cooperate I will take great pleasure in harming her tenfold in your place," Aceaus whispered in Jack's ear.

Jack turned and looked the fat bastard in the eyes. The hatred he saw in them proved that he meant every word, but how did he know? The thought was quickly pushed to the back of his mind when they began to rip the clothes from his body. The blood running down his shins from the spiked board he knelt on was causing an unbearable itch, an itch that would be the blessed distraction that he needed.

'Go someplace else, Jack! Go far away from here. Anywhere, but here,' Jack thought as the guards lifted his naked body into the chains. With his eyes squeezed tightly closed, he could feel them pulling the chains attached to the shackles on his wrists until he was stretched out in a spread eagle fashion. His shoulders and hips screamed from the overwhelming tension on them, his cheeks burning with embarrassment.

"Remember what I told you, heretic. Your woman will pay," Aceaus whispered in Jack's ear again.

Jack opened his eyes and looked around the hall for Sam to make sure she was safe. A guard stood behind her with a dagger at the ready. With Jack's attention on the guard behind Sam he didn't notice Aceaus pick up a knife similar to an old-fashioned straight razor and walk up to his left side. An evil sneer graced Aceaus's lips as he scraped the knife over Jack's head, not stopping until Jack was totally bald. He couldn't stop the shaking that overtook him when Aceaus began to run the knife around his manhood. The razor was abraded over every square inch of Jack's body until all the hair he had left was his eyebrows and eyelashes.

'You've got to be kidding me!' Jack thought as the sadistic fuck even shaved his ass crack. 'If I ever get my hands on him I'll rip his fucking head off and shit down his neck!'

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack had been tossed into his cell as though he were nothing more than a bag of trash. It hurt, but he was grateful that they hadn't put him back in the shackles. He scooted into the corner of the cell, pulling his knees to his chest. He was in pain and humiliated. Jack wondered where the rest of his team was being kept. By the looks of them they were being taken better care of than he was. He hated it when they were hurt. Though he didn't exactly love being hurt himself, he'd rather it be him than them. It was his duty to protect them. He wondered how he was protecting them now. Hell, he didn't even know where they were.

He put there thinking about his team and his son for what seemed like hours, but in reality it had been only minutes. The respite was short lived as Aceaus and his minions entered Jack's cell. The two hefty guards grabbed Jack by his arms as Aceaus approached, driving his fists into Jack's head and stomach. When the blows finally stopped, Jack tried to take a breath.

"What the hell? You got a head fetish or something, lard ass?" Jack gasped with his typical wit, earning him more blows until he finally fell into an unconscious heap.

Aceaus gave Jack one last kick to the stomach before he ordered the guards to put Jack back in the chains. With a final hard slap to Jack's face Aceaus left the cell with the guards in tow.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

The hunch-backed man returned to their cell with a tray of food, sitting it down and scurrying away as he always did. This irritated Daniel because he wanted to find out what was going on and where Jack was. Daniel took the tray to the Center of their dank cell and they gathered around to eat. Tonight they were given a stew with their bread and water. It didn't look too appetizing, but it smelled good and they were hungry. Each wondered if Jack was eating then too. Daniel looked over at Sam. The sad expression hadn't left her face. He really didn't blame her, he had no right to. Seriously, how many times had he screwed up over the years and gotten Jack hurt? Too many to count. Teal'c was being his usual quiet self, but the concern marred his face.

After they had finished their meal, Daniel put the tray near the door for the hunch-backed man to pick up then curled up on his pile of hay in the corner. No one spoke since they had returned to their cell. They didn't know what to say, at least Daniel didn't. He had learned of the witch trials in both school and college, but seeing the actual brutality of it was heart wrenching. His mind drifted back to Jack as he drifted into a light fitful sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Wednesday, June 12, 2002-Day 3 on Tritaria

A hard slap to the cheek snapped Jack awake, a wave of pain and dizziness washing over him. This was so getting old. Didn't that fat son of a bitch have anything better to do than to slap him around? He was happy that he had got at least a ten-second nap. The guards undid his chains and dragged him over to the altar-type table, lifting him up and slamming him down on it. Jack squeezed his eyes shut in a desperate attempt to brace himself for whatever the Pillsbury Doughboy had planned for him. The answer to that came in the form of a white hot pain that swept across the bottoms of his feet and up his legs. A groan of agony escaped his lips. He barely opened his eyes halfway when Aceaus brought the barbed reed rod hard across his feet again. Jack tried to stifle the sounds of pain coming from him, but he couldn't.

Finally, after thirty lashes Aceaus stopped and laid the rod on the table, smiling with pleasure as he watched the blood drip off of the rod and onto the table. He walked over to Jack, leaning down until his face was right in front of Jack's, his putrid-smelling breath blowing into Jack's nostrils. "It is time to face the Judges heretic," Aceaus sneered. "And remember, if you act out your woman will pay the price for you."

Anger welled up in Jack; he wanted to choke that asshole till there was nothing left of his neck. "Do I at least get to have my damned clothes back?"

"You are no longer worthy of attire. You will remain as you were at the time of your birth," Aceaus replied. An evil grin spread across his lips when he took in the rage in Jack's eyes. The fat bastard was getting too much pleasure from this, whether it be from the act of torturing Jack or the indignity of him being naked.

"Hey! Take it easy already," Jack snapped at the guards when they roughly removed him from the torture table and onto his freshly lashed feet. "Ah! God damned it!" The pain seared a path from the soles of feet all the way up to the very top of his head as the dirt ground into the open wounds.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

General George Hammond sat quietly at his desk, staring intently at the file that was laid out before him. The contents of the folder made him wonder how the hell he'd lasted so many years in the Air Force. For every good thing that happened, five hundred bad things followed and here, in this folder, was the good thing in the sea of hell that they were currently drowning in. With a tense huff he leaned back in his chair and laced his fingers behind his head, a hot ball formed in his stomach.

Jack had asked for another two days to work on the negotiations, to which he had granted his permission. During that check in Jack had reported that there were severe storms forming on the planet and that when they hit it would prevent further check ins. So he wished them luck and Godspeed. Now he wondered if his flagship team was alright, and he prayed that they would come home safe.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

"Is everything going according to plan?"

"Yes, Sir. He checked in on time and everything is playing out perfectly."

"Excellent! No one suspects anything?"

"Not at all. As far as Hammond is concerned everything is standard."

"Good. Be sure you keep it that way!"

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

The walk to Tribunal Hall was long and painful, dirt ground into the wounds on the bottoms of Jack's feet. The guards kept up a quick pace, adding to the misery Jack felt. By the time they chained him to the bench in the hall Jack felt like he was going to throw up. The nausea from the pain and hunger was reaching an unbearable level. His silent hope for Hammond to send a rescue team prevented him from seeing his team mates being led into the hall.

When the members of the Tribunal had taken their seats, Aceaus strolled in with a grin that would have made the Cheshire cat cower in envy.

"It is time for the proceedings to begin. What doth the Judges say?" Aceaus' booming voice echoed in Jack's ears making the pain in his head flare. He just wished that they would get this dog and pony show over with.

The man seated at the right end of the Judge's table stood, straightening his robe and glaring angrily at Jack. "The Trinus Dea have spoken to us. There is not enough evidence to elicit a vote. We pray thee to administer Cruciatus until such a time as thou see fit for him to speak nothing but the truth."

"Bring the accused!" Aceaus said with a sadistic smile on his face. "Bind him to the Torqueo."

Jack cringed. He didn't need to know the language to understand what the words meant. More torture. More humiliation, and the worst of all, more pain.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's body shook with fatigue and pain as he watched the Judges whisper among themselves while they played with the tokens used for voting. For three long hours he was beaten, burned with a heated rod, and told to confess. He fought to stay awake as each member took the tokens with a square hole in the Center and laid them in the Center of the table. Jack had a very good idea what that particular token meant even without looking at the satisfied look on their faces as well as the smirk that Aceaus wore. An overwhelming urge to knock it off of his fat face swept over Jack while the Judges wrote their unanimous finding on a scroll and rolled it up. The Judges then turned and nodded at Aceaus that they had reached their decision.

"The Judges will now pronounce guilt or innocence upon the accused," Aceaus announced.

SG-1 held their breath in anticipation. Sam, who was already shaking and sobbing, leaned on Teal'c for support. Daniel placed a gentle hand on Sam's shoulder as the man seated at the Center of the Judges table stood and unrolled a scroll, casting a sideways glance at Aceaus before he began to speak. "By the guidance of the Trinus Dea we pronounce guilt unto the accused," the man proclaimed, the last words drowned out by the cheers from the spectators.

Jack closed his eyes, not out of surprise, but out of pure dread of what was to come. He knew this was coming. Hell, they had been against him from the start. Turning his head toward his team, Jack forced a reassuring smile to his split and dry lips. Sam was sobbing uncontrollably. Teal'c stood tall with a sullen expression on his face. Daniel had his eyes to the floor looking like he was about to burst into tears.

The bell tolled and everyone stood to leave the hall. As usual Jack was the last to be dragged away to his cell. His head hurt. His feet hurt. His whole body hurt. His stomach cramped from lack of food and water.With a hard push he was sent sprawling onto the hard floor of his cell, landing face first onto the floor. As painful as it was, he was glad to be off of his battered feet. He dragged himself into the far corner of the cell and leaned his back against it with a huff. More blood trickled from his nose as he closed his eyes and thought of Sam. A small bit of Heaven till Doughboy came back for another slap session. He wanted sleep. He wanted food. He wanted the pain to stop. God he just wanted to go home.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

That night when the hunchbacked man brought their dinner, Daniel was waiting for him. After a while of coaxing and miming Daniel had figured out that not only was the man mute, but that his name was Danai. The conversation ended when Danai smiled and walked away. Daniel was frustrated at not being able to get anymore information. He picked up the tray and set it down in the Center of the cell where Teal'c and Sam were already seated, he sat down. "We have to find a way out of here and get Jack," Daniel said as he poked at the slop in his bowl.

"I have not found a way to escape this cell Daniel Jackson," Teal 'c replied.

"Maybe Danai could get us out," Sam suggested in a quiet voice.

"Maybe. He seems afraid of something," Daniel responded.

"Or someone," Teal'c said, raising an eyebrow.

"Maybe we could escape when they return us to our cells after the Tribunal?" Daniel offered in excitement.

"Colonel O' Neill does not appear to be physically able to make such an attempt, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c pointed out.

"He's right, Daniel. Colonel O' Neill looked pretty bad. It may only cause more trouble to try that," Sam's voice was low. She swallowed hard to suppress the tears that threatened to fall.

"Something's not right here," Daniel said.

"To what are you referring, Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c asked with his eyebrow raised.

"I'm not sure, Teal'c. We'll just have to wait until Danai comes back and I can try to talk to him more."

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack lay in a bloody heap, trying desperately to pass out and escape the pain, but, no relief came. He had dozed off, something he was learning the very hard way wasn't allowed. A swift kick to the ribs from lard ass snapped him awake. It didn't stop with that kick, but with many more. When the fat bastard finally got his rocks off he had Jack put into the manacles that hung from the wall and strutted out of the cell. Jack was at least thankful that they were low enough that he could sit, though he did wish that there was a cushion under his bare ass to protect his hip from the damp and cold. In his mind Jack went over the parts of his body that hurt. Well everything hurt. He was constantly spitting blood out of his mouth.

He looked up at the guard that had been posted there to be sure that Jack didn't fall asleep. "Hey!" Jack's voice was strained from the pain. "Why don't ya let me outta here?"

The guard scowled and answered Jack's question with a sturdy backhand to Jack's mouth spraying blood everywhere. The guard plowed another fist into Jack's ribs, a loud snap resounding off of the stone walls of the cell. To Jack it felt like someone had stabbed him in the chest with a lightning bolt. Add another broken rib and a split lip to the expanding list of ouchies.

'Oh God!' Jack thought as the coppery taste of blood came into his mouth. Spitting the blood from his mouth, he prayed that the darkness would consume him, but it refused to.

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Thursday, June 13, 2002-Day 4 on Tritaria

Tribunal Hall was abuzz with hushed anticipation as all in attendance awaited the announcement of punishment for Jack. By the time the man in the Center seat of the third table stood and unrolled a small scroll, Jack's hold on consciousness was rapidly fading. It had been three hours since he was strapped to the rack, his fingernails and toenails had been ripped out one by one before a red hot spear was stabbed repeatedly into both of his shins. Jack just wished that they would say that they were going to kill him and get it over with. Tribunal Hall grew dead silent as the Choosers voted on Jack's fate. Not even their whispers could be heard.

After a while, one of the Choosers stood and proclaimed, ""It is the will of the Trinus Dea that after a day of cleansing, the accused be branded a Heretic prior to the Insulto of Fides. If he survives, he is to be exiled back to the hell from whence he came. If he does not survive, to be buried as a heretic who will receive the benefit of life with the gods in Abyssus. Hence, he will no longer be able to interfere in another's affairs."

Jack put his head down as the rest of SG-1 let out gasps of shock and disbelief. Daniel and Sam broke down in tears, Teal'c bowed his head in sadness.

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"Daniel, what is Insulto of Fides?" Sam whispered to Daniel on the way back to their cell.

"The Leap of Faith," Daniel replied desperately trying to swallow the torrent of bile that was rising up his throat.

They walked the remainder of the way in silence. No further explanation was needed or wanted.

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That night when Danai brought the supper tray, he had a young woman with him.

"I'm Eilenas. I am Danai's wife and I attend your friend. Danai hath brought me here to tell you his words."

Sam's heart soared. "Where is Jack? Is okay?"

"He is not well as you have seen. Aceaus and his guards have been torturing him in his cell as well as during the Tribunal," Eilenas replied in a low voice.

Daniel swallowed down the bile that had risen in his throat when he heard Eilenas's words. A tear escaped his eye when he heard the heart wrenching sob from Sam's direction. It was painfully obvious that Jack was being beaten outside of the Tribunal by the way he would enter the hall with fresh marks each time.

"Wh-what was it that you came to say?" Daniel asked in a sad, broken voice.

"Prior night when Danai was gathering your evening meal he overheard Aceaus bribing the members of the Tribunal to go in his favor and convict your friend," Eilenas whispered then looked down the corridor.

"Did you hear why?" Sam asked Danai turning to him.

Danai shook his head sadly.

"Can you see if you can find out anything else, Danai?" Daniel asked.

Danai smiled and nodded. He had made friends and he was going to do whatever he could to please them.

"Why Danai can't talk?" Daniel asked Eilenas.

"Many years ago there was a young boy. He had been arrested for stealing a bundle of grapes from a table during one Aceaus's grand feasts. The boy was locked in a cell just down the way with orders of no food or water for three days. Danai was caught sneaking water and flat bread to the boy. When Aceaus came Danai told him that he thought that he was too cruel to the boy. Aceaus became very angry and had lye forced down Danai's throat."

Tears trickled down Sam and Daniel's face as the full understanding of the risk that Danai and Eilenas were taking came crashing down on them.

Danai made a sign with his hand to Eilenas.

"We must go. If they catch me here we all will be badly punished," Eilenas said worriedly.

Danai and Eilenas waved goodbye to their new friends and left them to their meal.

"Why would Aceaus bribe the Tribunal?" Sam asked in an angry voice.

"It seems as though Aceaus has something against O' Neill," Teal'c replied flatly.

"The ancient Greeks took their religious ceremonies very seriously. They thought that if they didn't appease the Gods that bad things would happen. It was common for religious leaders to bribe the law to turn things in their favor especially if they were friends with the accuser," Daniel rambled nervously. "Aceaus is the religious leader and we did interrupt a religious ceremony."

Sam pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them before resting her head on them. She thought about what Daniel was saying, but no matter how the situation was rationalized or explained it was still her fault. They should have been home three days ago instead of being stuck here and Jack being beaten. Then it hit her like a runaway train. Sam's head shot up, her eyes wide. "Guys. We're overdue and we haven't been checking in!"

"Yeah. So?" Daniel said, his mind was still distracted with the thought of Aceaus bribing the Tribunal.

"So maybe a rescue team will come before Jack's punishment," Sam said in a hopeful voice.

They had been so hell bent on finding a way to escape and figure out what was going on that they hadn't realized that they were overdue and a team would soon be coming to rescue them. For the first time in four days they rested a bit easier, though total ease was impossible knowing that Jack was still being hurt somewhere.


	5. Chapter 5

Friday, June 14, 2002-Day 5 on Tritaria

A very worried General Hammond entered the control room. His flagship team was twenty four hours overdue for their check in. Something was wrong, he could feel it deep in his gut. "Any word from SG-1?" Hammond's voice cracked with concern.

"No, sir," Sargeant Walter Harriman answered quietly.

"Dial up P4C-509 and see if we can establish contact," Hammond ordered.

Walter dialed the address, calling out each chevron as it locked into place. Hammond waited anxiously as the gate erupted and settled into the shimmering blue pool of water.

"Telemetry from the MALP coming in now, Sir."

Hammond looked at the video feed playing out on the screen before him. A severe thunderstorm raged on the planet, static from the lightening interfering with the signal.

"Looks like Jack was right about the storm. Okay, Sergeant shut it down. Inform me if there is any word from them."

"Yes, Sir."

Hammond let out a heavy sigh of disappointment. He had hoped that they at least would have been able to establish radio contact. There was nothing else that he could do here, so after telling Walter one more time to notify him immediately if there was any contact from SG-1, he went back to his office.

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The morning brought Aceaus into Jack's cell accompanied by three other priests and two guards. Aceaus stood in the corner and sneered as the three priests performed the three hour cleansing ritual. One priest spent an hour chanting a prayer in Latin. Priest number two spent his hour sprinkling holy water over Jack's head and performed an exorcism. Priest number three spent his hour quoting what Jack assumed was scriptures while shoving chunks of sacramental bread and pouring wine into Jack's mouth. Jack relished the bread and wine. Hell, it was the first food that he had gotten since he arrived on this damned planet. He tilted his head back, trying to get some of the water to run into his mouth. The wine was great since he hadn't been given more than a swallow of water a day, but it wasn't nearly enough to quench his thirst.

When they had finished they left the cell and Aceaus approached Jack looking like a ravenous dog that had to wait for his dinner. The sneer on his fat face widened as he pulled his hands from his robes. Jack's breath hitched in his throat when he saw the two inch thick wooden blocks strapped to the palms of Aceaus's hands. He didn't even want to hazard a guess as to what the tubby son of a bitch planned to do with them. He soon found out the hard way when without warning Aceaus raised his arms and brought them together hard on Jack's head, each hand slamming a wooden block into Jack's ears. Pain exploded in Jack's head and the room began to spin before blackness swallowed him. Aceaus let out a howl of pleasure. The more pain he caused Jack, the happier he got. He barked orders to the guards to wake Jack up, so they got a bucket of cold water and dumped it over his head. Jack came to with a start, gasping hard to catch his breath. With a pleasurable grin, Aceaus grabbed Jack's chin in vice-like grip.

"No rest for you heretic! Besides, your meal will soon be arriving," Aceaus said. He let go of Jack's face and walked out of the cell laughing.

Three hours later, Eilenas entered Jack's cell carrying a wooden bowl filled with what looked like gruel and a cup of water. Jack jumped when she placed a gentle hand on his cheek to get his attention. The moment he opened his eyes he regretted it. The room spun wildly and the ringing in his ears reached a crescendo. Without opening his eyes again, Jack just let her feed him. After he had emptied the bowl and cup, Eilenas put the items on the table and took a damp cloth from the pouch attached to her skirt. She gently wiped the food from Jack's mouth before wiping the blood from his neck and ears. Jack flinched as the rag came into contact with his battered ears even though the coolness eased the pain a little. When she left, Jack settled his throbbing head on his arm, trying to rest before the next beating. It felt good to have food in his stomach, now if only he had some of Doc's joy juice for the pain he'd be a happy camper.

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Aceaus strolled into Jack's cell still dressed in his service robes from Chapel, his chest swelling with pride as he took in the site of Jack's bloody body dangling from the chains that held him up. It had just been long enough for the food he had been given to begin to digest and enough time for him to be relaxed. So with one well placed unexpected punch to his stomach from Aceaus, Jack's bowels and bladder let loose of their own accord. Jack gasped for air and in his mind he tried to curl into himself as he felt his waste run down his legs and drip to the floor. Aceaus laughed with glee as he rained more abuse down on Jack.

The pain reached an unbearable level and Jack couldn't hold back any longer, he launched what was left in his stomach all over the front of Aceaus's robes. "Oh, shit!" Jack thought as he saw the look of murderous rage swept across Aceaus's face.

Aceaus clenched his hand into a white knuckled fist, and with a loud yell brought it into a collision course with Jack's ribs. Jack barely felt at least three more of his ribs snap before the pain engulfed him and the lights went out. With the relief that the blow brought Aceaus let out a pleasured sigh. He nodded for the guards to release Jack from the chains, smiling as Jack's limp form plopped into the puddle of his own vomit and bodily waste.

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That night Jack huddled in his own sewage and blood, struggling to draw more breath into his battered lungs. He thought of Sam and Andy. He wanted to die, wanted the pain to end. His heart lurched at the thought of leaving them, but he knew that he didn't have the strength left to survive the punishment that awaited him. He had long ago lost any hope that he had left, lost all hope of a rescue, any hope of living, no hope of going home. All Jack could do was think of his Sam and draw strength from the vision of her beautiful face. Her blonde hair was his sunshine, her crystal blue eyes was his sky, and Andy, his light brown hair cut proudly like his dad's and light dashing of freckles that sprinkled across his nose and cheeks. How he watched him grow from the scrawny five-year-old to an active and lively eight-year-old, raring and ready to go to school every morning. He found that he could lose himself in those thoughts, zone out to make it through the beatings.

"I love you, Sam and Andy," He whispered as the darkness finally claimed him.


	6. Chapter 6

Saturday, June 15, 2002-Day 6 on Tritaria  
Hammond sat in his office, angrily tapping his pen on the edge of his desk. SG-1 was more than twenty-four hours overdue and they had not checked in. He had called Washington earlier that morning for approval to send a rescue team but he was denied and told in no uncertain terms that there would be dire consequences if he disobeyed. When he requested to speak to President Hayes himself he was curtly hung up on. Damn it! He was going to find out why Washington had turned its back on a team that had saved their sorry asses on more than one occasion at their own personal risk. He picked up the phone and dialed Major Paul Davis' direct line.

"Major Davis."

“Hammond here. I need to know why the rescue mission for SG-1 was denied?" Hammond snapped.

"What?" Davis asked in obvious confusion.

Hammond went on to explain the situation to Major Davis adding a few colorful words, his anger causing his Texas accent to thicken more than usual.

"I didn't know anything about that, General, but you can bet that I'll find out. I'll call you back later, Sir," Davis replied, obviously unaware of the events.

With that the phone call ended, Hammond replaced the receiver and leaned back in his chair. He prayed that SG-1 was safe and would come home soon.

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The city was a flurry of activity, shops were closed and everyone was gathering outside of the castle awaiting the start of the procession to Petra Hill. Aceaus had been out earlier that morning selling tickets and making himself a handsome profit at Jack's expense. It was a grand occasion to them, to walk behind the condemned as he was paraded to his punishment. A lavishly dressed matron passed out small stacks of stones to throw at the prisoner when he passed by. Though most had baskets of half-eaten and rotted food to throw at him, they gladly accepted the added ammunition.

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In his cell, Jack was going through his final beating before his punishment. Taking pride in his work Aceaus stepped back. A man dressed like priest had come in and said a prayer over Jack, and to Jack's ears it sounded like they were underwater. He was delirious by now from the pain, hunger, and exhaustion. When the priest was done Eilenas entered with a wooden bowl of gruel. With a whispered apology she fed the slop to Jack as Aceaus watched with a sadistic grin on his pudgy red face. After he was fed the last bite, Eilenas curtsied to Aceaus and left the cell. Jack wondered what the nasty stuff was and if Aceaus went soft and allowed him a last meal. The larger guard released the chain, and Jack's body hit the stone floor with a sickening thud. Jack was lifted by his arms and an iron cage-like thing put over his head and locked into place. A piece of metal that hung off of it was shoved into his mouth. They dragged him from the cell and out of the dungeon.

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The bright sun stabbed at his eyeballs when they stepped outside, but he welcomed the sweet smelling fresh air. He savored the feel of it as it brushed against his battered face. The first thing he saw when he opened his eyes was his team, his friends, his family, his Sam. They looked sad, but thankfully they were uninjured. He basked in the sight of them and breathed the fresh air in as deep as his battered chest would allow. Aceaus' fat ass was perched on top of a white horse behind a wagon, lavish floral wreaths decorating the horse's reins. Jack was then lifted up unto the back of a wagon and locked his head and arms into a standing stock that had been bolted to the bed of the wagon. The pain he was in overrode the shame he felt from being paraded down the street naked. He was so weak that it took all he had in him just to remain upright to keep his weight off of his dislocated hip and so he didn't strangle himself as the wagon bucked on the cobblestone street. When the wagon began to move the city folk started to throw the rocks and rotten food at him. Not to be left out, the children grabbed up the horses' droppings and lobbed it at Jack's head. The target practice didn't stop until the procession reached the city gate. Halfway up the hill Jack's stomach gave an angry rumble and without warning his bowels released again, splattering their contents down the back of his legs. Aceaus let out a loud bellow of laughter and the crowd cheered, loving the humiliation that Jack was experiencing. The macabre parade reached Petra Hill within a few minutes, but to Jack it was an eternity.

Jack was dragged up to the top of Petra Hill to where a stone stage about twenty feet long stood, high enough so that the crowd could see everything. After all, they had paid good money for the tickets to witness the event. Sam, Daniel, and Teal'c were posted at the front of the crowd to watch Jack's punishment be carried out. The excited crowd took their places around the structure as Jack was dragged up onto the stage. He felt faint when he saw what awaited him there. Directly in the Center of the stage stood a wooden frame consisting of two ten foot poles with boards nailed between them in the shape on an upside down Y. On one side was a stone fire pit with a small fire burning in it and on the other was a small wooden table. Jack was put on display in the front of the stage just behind Aceaus and it was at that time his bowels decided to release yet again, sending the crowd into fits of cheers and laughter.

"May the Trinus Dea have mercy on your soul. May the Trinus Dea smile down upon you," Aceaus spoke with a sadistically happy tone. "Begin!"

One of Jack's guards removed the cage-like helmet from Jack's head and tossed it off to the side, the clang it made as it hit causing Jack to flinch. Both guards roughly grabbed Jack by the arms and dragged him over to the upside-down Y thing, lifting him up. The shackles were fastened over his already chafed wrists and pulled tight behind his back. His legs were then strapped by the ankle to bottom part of the Y, and Jack couldn't stop the hiss of pain that escaped his lips when they moved his legs, and his burned heels hit into the boards.

Sweat poured down Jack's face, his breaths coming in harsh gasps. Jack knew that he was going to die and he wanted the last thing that he saw to be Sam's beautiful face. He cracked his eyes open to look for his Sam before vomit propelled from his mouth and all over the front of himself. With a sadistic sneer on his face Aceaus grabbed the handle of an iron that had been sticking out of the fire and held it in the air making the crowd cheer louder. The end of the iron was red hot and in the shape of an upside-down cross with an X instead of a crossbeam. Aceaus strolled over and stood in front of the semi-conscious Jack.

"Thou will now be branded a heretic for all eternity," Aceaus said loudly so that the crowd could hear.

"No!" Jack gasped, his voice no more than a pained whisper.

Jack barely got the word out and Aceaus pushed the brand into the Center of Jack's chest, inhaling the smell of Jack's scorching flesh with an almost sexually pleased expression. Jack let out a howl of pure agony before falling unconscious once again much to the pleasure of the crowd. While Aceaus basked in the cheers from the crowd, the guards unchained Jack and let him fall unceremoniously onto the stage. Aceaus turned around and spit on Jack before he took his fat sandal-clad foot and kicked Jack hard in the stomach. With a nod of Aceaus's head two guards picked Jack up and lifted him above their heads, throwing him over the edge of the stage. Time seemed to slow to a crawl as his limp body fell, landing hard on the dry, rocky ground fifteen feet below.

When the guards released Sam, Teal'c, and Daniel they rushed to Jack's side. Jack laid on his right side gasping for breath, blood pooling around his head and legs. His right arm was bent in an unnatural way behind his back. The fingers of his left twisted back so that they were nearly touching the back of his hand that was laying in front of his limp body. Sam knelt down and cradled his head in her lap, nearly retching when she saw the rock that his head had landed on. His right eye was badly bruised and nearly swollen shut, the left one opened to a mere slit, showing a bit of his chocolate brown iris. Sam couldn't believe that he was alive much less conscious. She began to gently run her fingers over his bare head, mindful of the depression in his skull where it had hit the rock. She stared down at him, fighting to keep the tears at bay.

"W'y – Ss-tham?" Jack's voice was low and slurred. A harsh cough wracked his body, blood spraying from his mouth. His bleary eyes gazed up at her face once more before they drifted closed. The quiet words stabbed into Sam's heart.

"I'm sorry, Jack. God, I'm so sorry," Sam said, tears pouring from her eyes. Her hand gently wiped the blood that ran from the corner of his mouth. "Just hold on, Jack. We'll get you home to Janet."

"Take him back to hell with haste. He is polluting our pure world," Aceaus ordered then spit on Jack again.

Daniel tried to charge at him, but Teal'c's strong hand grabbed his shoulder. Daniel shook free from Teal'c's grip when Danai pulled at his arm then motioned to a two wheeled handcart beside him then to Jack.

"You want us to use this to take Jack home?" Daniel asked.

Danai nodded with a smile and motioned for Eilenas to push it closer to them.

"Thank you," Daniel said then turned his attention to Teal'c. "Can you lift him up into this?"

"I will do as you wish Daniel Jackson," Teal'c said before he knelt, with greatest of care picked Jack up and gently lay him in the hay filled cart. Sam jumped up in the cart beside Jack and checked him over. The smell of burnt flesh and blood made her stomach churn.

Daniel turned to Danai in time to see his smile turn to a look of terror. Daniel followed Danai's fear-filled gaze and he saw Aceaus staring at Eilenas and Danai with a look of wrath that would scare the devil himself.

"He's going to hurt you for helping us isn't he?" Daniel asked.

"We will be put to death!" Eilenas replied tearfully as Danai nodded his head.

"Daniel, Jack needs medical attention now!" Sam yelled.

"Come with us," Daniel meant this as a question, but it came across as an order.

 

Teal'c grabbed the handles of the cart and they ran for the gate with Eilenas and Danai trailing behind them. It only took them almost an hour to make the mile trek to the gate, going slow and easy so as not to jar Jack too much. Sam checked on Jack as soon as they stopped. His pulse was slow and his breaths were shallow. Blood had already began to soak the hay beneath him.

"Damn it!" Daniel yelled and slumped to the ground. He buried his face in his hands and let the tears flow.

"What is the problem, Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c asked as he set the cart down.

"They took our gear. We don't have a GDO to open the iris," Daniel replied without looking up.

Danai smiled and walked over to the cart, reaching in and grabbing a sack near Jack's head. He took it over to Daniel and gave it to him.

"We stowed your belongings in our home with the exception of your sacks. We managed to save one thing for you Daniel. You will also find your friends possessions in the sack as well," Eilenas informed.

Daniel opened the sack and breathed a sigh of relief. Inside he found all the gear that had been taken from them, including their GDOs and his camera. He jumped up and dialed home, punching the code into the device as soon as the vortex opened. Finally, after six days in hell they were going home.


	7. Chapter 7

A very anxious and worried General Hammond raced to the control room as soon as he had heard the blaring of the klaxons going off and the announcement of an off-world Gate activation. His heartbeat quickened with the hope that it would be SG-1. It had been two days since Jack had checked in and said that there was a bad storm brewing on the planet; there hadn't been contact since then. After getting conformation from Sergeant Harriman that it was in fact SG-1, he hurried down to the gate room. Just as he stepped through the thick metal blast doors, Daniel exited the Stargate followed by a terrified looking man and woman. Teal'c was last, pulling a cart with Sam and Jack in it behind him. 

"We need a medical team!" Daniel yelled out as soon as his feet hit the ramp not realizing that Janet and her team were already waiting for them. "Jack needs help!"

In a flash Janet was at Jack's side, nearly vomiting at the sight and smell of him. He was covered in dried body waste and blood along with the countless wounds that wafted of infection. The total lack of hair on his body surprised her. His breathing was slow and wheezing, his pulse just a weak flutter beneath her fingertips. “Can you tell me what happened to him?" Janet asked no one in particular.

“He’d been beaten and tortured every day that we'd been gone. Right before we came here, he was beaten again and thrown off of a fifteen-foot stage. He landed on his right side and his head smashed into a rock. I think he was given some kind of purging agent because he had severe diarrhea, "Daniel relied, speaking rapidly and his voice cracked with sadness.

Janet gasped and then swallowed hard. From Jack's appearance it was obvious that he'd been treated harshly, to put it mildly. After putting an oxygen mask over his face, Janet pulled a handkerchief out of her lab coat pocket and unfolded it. She discreetly covered Jack's private area before ordering her team to get him onto the gurney and to the infirmary.

Sam, Teal'c, and Daniel tried to follow, but were stopped by Hammond for a report and an explanation of the strangers that followed them through the Stargate.

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When the gurney carrying Jack entered the infirmary, Janet began to check him over while shouting orders to her team. Nurses rushed around Jack, washing him before attaching monitors, an IV, and a catheter. Janet's eyes quickly scanned Jack's body, noting the bloated and bruised appearance of his stomach. Janet's heart sank when she saw clear fluid and blood leaking from Jack's right ear, a surefire sign of a brain injury. Both of his ears were caked with dried blood. The depression in his skull was starting to bulge outward from the swelling of his brain pushing against the bone fragments. Janet pulled her penlight out of her pocket and pulled Jack's eyelids open to check his pupils, unequal with a slow reaction. Damn!

"Dr. Frasier. There's no urine," a nurse informed Janet as she taped the catheter tube to Jack's leg.

Janet's face wrinkled into a concerned and fearful expression as she took in the low readings from the machines attached to Jack. A feeling of foreboding gripped her heart as her eyes fell to her patient. She placed a gentle hand on his left cheek to get his attention.

"Colonel? Sir, open your eyes if you can hear me, "Janet said hoping for a response, and gently caressing his slightly fevered cheek.

To her delight, Jack's good eye slowly opened into a slit and shifted to her. The joy faded fast as Jack's eye rolled back into his head and his body shook with convulsions, a bloody froth foaming from his lips. Janet quickly enlisted a nurse to help roll Jack onto his left side. The seizure no sooner stopped when the heart monitor screamed an alarm. Jack was quickly and gently returned to his back. Janet and her staff hurriedly began doing CPR. Janet did chest compressions while a nurse removed the oxygen mask and replaced it with a bag-mask to pump air into his lungs.

“Get the paddles over here! "Janet ordered then injected five cc's of epinephrine directly into Jack's heart . When there was no change in his condition, she grabbed for the paddles. "Charge to 200. Clear!"

She held the paddles to Jack's chest and pressed the button. Jack's body spasmed and fell still.

“360. Clear!"

Once again, she held the paddles to Jack's chest; he convulsed and fell still.

"Come on, Colonel. Don't you dare give up on me now!" Janet pleaded with him as she kept a hopeful eye on the heart monitor.

After several tense moments, the monitor spiked then settled into a regular beep.

"That's it Jack. Keep fighting." Janet breathed a sigh of relief. “Let’s get him intubated and a chest tube in, " Janet yelled. "Get a CT scan and x-rays. Let's start him on two units of O-neg and a broad spectrum antibiotic." Once Jack was stable, Janet told her nurses to get him cleaned up and ready to be transferred.

With one final look at her patient, Janet grabbed Jack's chart and rushed to the briefing room to speak to General Hammond. She tried to swallow the lump in her throat when she entered and found the remaining members of SG-1 seated around the table where they had just finished their post-mission briefing. They looked so lost sitting there, tired and dirty. They obviously hadn't had time for a shower after their post-mission medicals. At least they were unharmed, which she wholly wished that she could say the same for Jack. Lord, she hated being the bearer of bad news.

"How is he, Doctor?" Hammond asked in his stern, but quiet voice.

"He's stable for now, but he needs to be transferred to the Academy Hospital as soon as possible, sir," Janet replied.

“I’ll call and get the helicopter ready, "Hammond said sensing the urgency in her voice. During her tenure at the SGC, he'd learned never to question her judgment. If she said that Jack needed to be transferred immediately, then by God he would be transferred.

Sam looked fearfully at her friend. “Janet?" It was all Sam could get out.

“When we got him into the infirmary, he had a seizure and his heart stopped," Janet 's voice wavered. She knew she had to be professional, but Jack was in bad shape and he was a friend. "He needs surgery, but I can't do it here because of the severity of his head injury."

Hammond hung up the phone and turned toward Janet. “The helicopter will be ready on the tarmac in five minutes."

“Permission to get the Colonel ready?" Janet requested.

“Granted," Hammond said.

Janet was out of the door before the word left Hammond's lips. 

Sam, Teal'c, and Daniel leaned forward in their seats, looking at Hammond with pleading expressions, eager to get to Jack's side.

“I know that you are all anxious to get to Jack, so we'll finish this at a later time. Dismissed," he said.

Sam, Daniel, and Teal'c stood and rushed toward the door. Before Sam left, Hammond got her attention.

"Major O'Neill, I'd like to talk to you." Hammond's voice was stern. "It concerns your actions during the mission."

“Yes, Sir," she said quietly and reluctantly sat back down.

Hammond gave her a long look. “Major O'Neill, I must say that I am very surprised at your conduct. I'd expect something like this from Dr. Jackson, but you, as an Air Force officer, should have known better than to go against orders. Under the circumstances, I am not going to put you up for a court martial. I know that you all went through one hell of an ordeal out there. However, I am going to suspend you for thirty days without pay, "he said a little more gently.

"I understand, sir," she acknowledged, briefly scrunching her eyes shut.

"Dismissed."

Sam went to walk out of the office, but stopped halfway out. She turned around slowly, a look of unrestrained anger on her face. “I might have messed up and got Jack hurt, but, you, Sir, let us down by not sending help!" she spat before she stormed out.

General Hammond sat back down as Sam's words slammed into him. He felt horrible for yelling at her the way he did, but the emotion of the events had everyone frazzled and unable to think clearly. He was worried about Jack and totally confused. If Jack had been tortured every day for the past six days, then who the hell had been making the check-ins?

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Tears streaked down Sam's face as she ran to the infirmary. Just as she arrived, the infirmary doors swung open and a gurney carrying a bundled up Jack was rushed out. Nurses carrying life support equipment ran alongside, Janet keeping her place at his side. The grim procession made their way topside to the awaiting helicopter. Sam found comfort in Teal'c's strong arms as Daniel watched tearfully when Jack was loaded into the helicopter.

Sam pulled away from Teal'c and took a few steps toward where Janet was standing. "Janet? Please?" Sam pleaded tearfully.

"Alright, Sam," Janet told her sadly, motioning Sam to come on. She knew Sam's plea was to be with Jack and under such dire circumstances she would permit her friends to be together.

Sam quickly climbed into the helicopter and the door was slid shut. Daniel and Teal'c watched the helicopter take off, squinting as the wind from the blades blew dust into their eyes. Their eyes were glued to the chopper until it disappeared from sight then they raced to Daniel's car. Daniel's tires squealed as he sped out of the parking lot. He barely kept his speed under the limit as he drove the ten miles to the Academy Hospital.

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Sam sat at the head of Jack's gurney, quietly sobbing at the sight of him in such a state. Jack was bundled in a dark gray emergency blanket, his head was immobilized with a neck brace and two large foam blocks on each side of his head with Velcro straps across his chin and forehead. His head was loosely wrapped in bandages and despite the nurses' attempts at wiping him up there was still an alarming amount of dried blood on his face. The sounds of the monitoring equipment and the medic's voice as he radioed an update on Jack to the Academy Hospital came to Sam's ears as garbled sounds. All she could concentrate on was her silent prayer that Jack would live.

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They just got back." The young man's voice was no more than a whisper as his beady eyes flicked around making sure there was no one around. His knuckles were snow white as he gripped the phone's receiver tight to his ear.

"Did it go as planned?"

"Yes. He was pretty bad, but still alive. I don't think he'll stay that way much longer though." The young man paused to take a quick look around. "Fraiser had him flown to the Academy Hospital. It didn't sound good."

"Excellent. I wanna know the minute that son of a bitch is dead."

"I'll call when I hear anything."

"When will the pictures be ready?"

"I don't know, Sir. I haven't received word of his return yet."

"Damn. Oh, well it'll be like waiting for Christmas. Just get them to me as soon as they are ready."

"Yes, sir."

"Be careful and don't get caught!"

"You doubt me?"

"Don't be so damned cocky! I doubt everything and everyone when the situation is so important. That son of a bitch has been a thorn in my side for too fucking long. I want him to be a memory and I don't want no cocky little punk like you screwing things up. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"

"Oh, yes, sir!" The young man snapped and slammed the phone back down on the hook. He quickly bit down on his bottom lip and looked around, worried that someone had heard him. Sweat began to bead on his forehead as he rushed from the room.


	8. Chapter 8

A team of emergency staff was waiting for them when the helicopter landed on the roof of the USAF Academy Hospital. The skids no sooner touched the landing pad when the side door of the chopper was opened and the backboard carrying Jack's still form was slid out onto a gurney. Sam jumped out and ran to catch up to the group as they disappeared into the emergency department doors. Her heart clenched in her chest when she saw Jack's gurney disappear into the trauma bay of the ER. She took two steps to go to his side, but was gently grabbed by the shoulders and ushered into a nearby private waiting room. Being taken away from Jack was all that Sam could take. She plopped down in a chair near the door and burst into tears.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Teal'c, Daniel,and Sam sat in the waiting area of the newly modernized Neuro-ICU at the USAF Academy Hospital. It had been four hours since Jack had been taken into surgery and they had yet to hear any news. Daniel moved to the seat near Sam and put his arm around her for comfort. Teal'c had practically carried her here when the nurse came in to the emergency waiting area two hours ago and told them that they could come here to wait since this is where Jack would be brought after he came out of surgery. 

Sam's eyes were red and slightly swollen from crying. The tightness in her stomach that formed when Jack was wheeled away from her when they arrived still remained. The door to the waiting room opened, causing the trio to jump to their feet. General Hammond entered, followed by a nurse with a cart of coffee and sandwiches for them.

"Is there any news on Colonel O'Neill?" Hammond asked the nurse, his voice was low and tight to hide the emotion in it.

"No, Sir. I'm sure as soon as there is any, someone will be out to speak with you. I'm sorry," the young nurse replied then took her leave.

Sam's heart sank as she watched the nurse leave the room, wanting to scream at her to go and find out how Jack was doing. More tears filled her eyes, warping her vision. 

Hammond quietly took a chair across from the three teammates and folded his hands in his lap, rubbing them together in an attempt to still his nerves. He wanted to say something to comfort Sam, but General Hammond, Commander of Stargate Command, found himself at a total and complete loss for words and actions. Jack O' Neill was more to him than his Vice Commander and an attitudinal Colonel; he was a friend.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

The operating room was a cacophony of noise and shouts from the various surgeons that were simultaneously operating on Jack. Janet looked down at him. His chest was wide open with the surgeons she was helping working swiftly to repair the internal bleeding and flailed ribs. She quickly glanced up towards Jack's head where the neurosurgeon was trying to fix the damage to Jack's skull, carefully removing the shattered pieces of bone from his brain. It was heart wrenching to see Jack, her friend, this way. They had had a close call with him a few hours ago, but thankfully he remained stable since and they were nearing the end of the numerous repairs that his body needed. She prayed that he would survive. She didn't want to lose her friend and then have to tell his wife and son that she had failed them and let Jack die. Her thoughts went to his son, sitting in her home with her daughter totally unaware that his father was fighting for his life. His wife sitting out in the waiting room no doubt worried out of her mind about him.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sam’s mind was reeling, thoughts swirling around like a hurricane in her head. Her heart felt fit to burst inside of her chest and her breath would catch in her chest whenever an announcement would come over the public address system, each time expecting it to be a Code Blue in the OR. The smells from the coffee and sandwiches mixed with the common hospital scent, causing the nausea in her stomach to flare. She wished that she knew something about how Jack was doing. Was he alive? Was he dead? If he was dead they would have told them by now, wouldn't they? Something would have to be wrong because they have been in the operating room for over five hours now. Was no news good news at this point? Was Janet in a quiet room somewhere, preparing herself to come and say that Jack had died? How would she tell Andy?

She looked around the room at her friends. It was obvious that this cruel waiting game was taking an emotional toll on them as well. Even General Hammond looked pale and drained as did the normally stoic Teal'c. It felt so good to have them here, she truly didn't think that she would've had it in her to do this alone.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Three hours later, a very weary Janet entered the waiting area accompanied by a tall middle-aged man, both dressed in light green surgical scrubs. Janet's heart ached. She mentally reminded herself to be a doctor ahead of being a friend, but, that's what they all were, friends. No, they had become closer than that; they had become a family, always there for each other through the good and the bad. Now she was in a situation that she had never, in her life, had ever wanted to be in. She had to look her friends, her family, in the eyes and tell them that the man that, over the years, had become the glue that held them together was as close to death as he'd ever been. She closed her eyes and breathed in deep, the smell of the fresh plaster and paint filling her nose. 

She silently prayed for the strength to keep herself together and opened her eyes. "Colonel O' Neill had some internal bleeding along with numerous broken bones including badly dislocated hips and a fractured pelvic girdle on the right side. His right leg was broken and there numerous stab wounds to both of his legs. He is severely dehydrated and malnourished. All of his open wounds, including the burns on his feet, were badly infected." Janet paused and collected herself, swallowing hard to suppress the tears that threatened. After a deep breath she continued, "We repaired the internal bleeding and debrided the burns on the bottoms of his feet. The orthopedic surgeon fixed his broken leg and stabilized his hips. We also stabilized his ribs with plates and screws. The hardware will be removed in a few weeks after the ribs have healed properly."

A tense silence fell upon the room, emotions hanging in the air like a heavy blanket. Teal'c bowed his head sadly as tears streamed from Sam and Daniel's eyes, even General Hammond began to shed a tear. 

Janet swallowed hard to keep her emotions down, she needed to be strong for her friends. She gave a subtle nod to the other doctor.

"I'm Dr. David Ward. I'll be Colonel O' Neill's neurologist and I performed the surgery on his skull," the man said introducing himself. "Colonel O' Neill had a linear fracture to the back and a severe depression fracture to the right side of his skull. These caused his brain to bruise and swell, causing his brain to push into the interior of his skull. I removed the portion of damaged bone from the depression fracture to allow room for the brain to swell. We'll replace the section of skull with a plate when the swelling goes down and stays down. That could take anywhere from a few weeks to a few months. When it comes to brain injuries, there is no way to predict anything."

"Brain injuries?" Sam asked, barely able to get the words out.

"There is significant damage to his brain, but we won't know how bad or how it will affect him until we can test him," Dr. Ward added.

"W-will he be okay?" Daniel asked, his voice cracking with emotion.

Janet shook her head sadly. "We won't know until he wakes up. I'm sorry, but he's lapsed into a deep coma."

They sat in stunned silence. Sam grabbed Daniel's hand and squeezed it for strength. It was all her fault. It might as well have been her that beat Jack.

"C-can we, uh, go see him?" Sam choked.

Dr. Ward politely excused himself. He knew the following conversation needed to take place privately between friends. 

Janet took the seat across from where Sam and Daniel were, laying Jack's chart on her lap. She fiddled with the edges of it in an attempt to keep her hands from shaking. "Yes, but, there are some things that I want to talk to all of you about first, to prepare you for what you are about to see. I don't mean to scare you. I just want you to be prepared is all. Right now he's in critical condition and on total life support. He's very weak. His body was put through a lot of trauma compounded with the blood loss and infection." 

Janet closed her eyes and tried to steady her breathing. She could feel the tears fighting their way to the surface, burning to be shed. When she had herself settled more, she opened her eyes and continued, "He is covered in bandages and bruises, not to mention all of the supportive equipment. We'll do what we can to help him, but it's up to him to survive. The next twenty-four hours are critical."

When everyone had caught their breath, they stood to go to Jack's room. Janet reached out and laid a comforting hand on Sam's arm. "Sam, do you want me to call Cassie and have her bring Andy?" Janet asked quietly, trying in vain to hold her tears back.

"Yes, please," Sam sniffed and wiped the tears from her eyes.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

On the way down the long glass walled hall of the Neuro-ICU to Jack's room Janet explained the new additions to the ward. There were now family living quarters attached to the patient's room so the family could be with the patient at all times. It was her small way of trying to comfort them, letting them know that they could be by Jack's side and help him throughout his long journey to recovery. Her petite frame stopped in front of room number five and Sam craned her neck in a futile attempt to see past the privacy curtain around the bed. 

Janet gave them a gentle smile and waved the group through the doorway. The sight before them as they stepped around the curtain had a profound effect on every member of the group, including General Hammond. Janet nodded to the nurses that were still there settling Jack into the bed and they took their leave.

The room was deadly silent except for the steady beep of the heart monitor and the click-hiss of the ventilator, the antiseptic smell from a fresh surgery hung in the air. Jack's pale form lay perfectly still on the semi-reclined bed, the dark blue sheets heightening his ashen appearance. He was naked with the exception of a white hand cloth covering his groin. His bandage-swathed head was tilted to the left, the Inter Cranial Pressure monitor perched on top. A blue breathing tube in his mouth and a white feeding tube in his nose nearly covered the left side of his bruised and slightly swollen face. There was a white bite guard between Jack's teeth to prevent him from biting down on the vent tube during a seizure. Between that and the thick tape holding them in place, Jack's lips were almost completely covered. Thick, clear tape held his eyes closed. Various other tubes and wires, including a chest drain and a central line between his neck and shoulder, were going in and out Jack's body. Bandages from the surgery nearly covered his battered chest and along his right hip. His long legs were bandaged from the tips of his toes to his knees and the right one was in a traction device that resembled the ramps to pull cars on for repairs. Both arms rested on pillows.

Sam walked up to the bed and carefully grasped his limp hand in hers. She was careful of the bandage wrapped around his wrist and the IV nestled in his forearm. She ran her thumb along the back of his hand, letting the tears fall from her eyes unchecked. Out of the corner of her eyes she saw Daniel take up a spot to the left of Jack's bed, putting his hand gently on Jack's arm above his elbow. 

Daniel's tear filled eyes fell upon the soft brace on Jack's wrist. “General, is there a way that you can contact our allies? Maybe they can help him?" Daniel stammered.

"No," Sam said in a quiet voice.

They all looked at Sam with confusion. Of all of them, they thought that she would be the one that would want to get Jack help. They were speechless, but it was Daniel who spoke, finally put their looks of disbelief in words, "What?"

"After what happened with Kanan, he told me no more alien intervention. He said that he would rather die than get help from aliens. He made me promise him," Sam replied quietly, her voice was heavy with emotion.

It was hard for Sam to deny the urge to get him the aid, but it would've been harder to betray Jack. She took in the understanding looks of the others before turning her attention back to Jack's battered form. It was a common understanding among them how Jack felt about accepting alien help, but they desperately wanted him to live. Even if she'd be willing to go against Jack's wishes, she wouldn't be able to. The Goa'uld healing device was currently at Area 51 and they weren't allowed access to it.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Janet stood nervously at the entrance of the hospital, waiting for her daughter to bring Andy to see his dad. She hoped that it wouldn't scare the little boy too badly to see his father in such a state, but if, God forbid, Jack wouldn't make it, the boy had the right to say goodbye to him. She had instructed Cassie not to tell Andy anything, just to bring him down right away. Now she was trying to work out in her head what to say to him when he got here. How do you explain to an eight-year-old boy that his daddy may not live to watch him grow up?

As that thought popped into her head, Janet saw her daughter's compact car pull into the parking lot. She closed her eyes and breathed in cool night air, letting it wash through her. Visions of Jack's surgery began to flash in her mind, causing her to open her eyes in a snap just in time to see her teenage daughter approaching with a very sleepy looking little boy in tow. Her heart sank when she saw the fretful look on Cassie's face. "Hey, sweetheart," Janet greeted her daughter with a forced cheerfulness. "Hi, Andy."

“What’s going on, Aunt Janet? Is Mom and Dad okay?" Andy asked through a yawn.

"Why don't we go inside to my office and talk over a nice cup of hot chocolate?" Janet offered trying her damnedest to keep her voice calm.

"Okay, Aunt Janet."

With a grim smile, she nodded to Cassie and put her arm around Andy's shoulder to lead them inside. It took all she had to keep a tight hold on her emotions as they made their way into the building and then down the long dim corridor to her office. Without a word, Janet lead him to sit in the chair near her desk and set to work making them hot chocolate. From the corner of her eye she could see Cassie bouncing on her heels. She hadn't told Cassie much other than SG-1 had finally come home and that Jack was hurt pretty badly. When the chocolate was ready, Janet put the mugs one a tray and carried it over to her desk. She sat down and passed out the mugs, taking a sip of her own before she began to speak.

"Andy, your Mom, Dad, Uncle Teal'c and Uncle Daniel finally came home today." Janet had to bite down hard on her emotions when Andy reacted with whoop at the news of his parents' return. Dear Lord did it make this harder, she thought. "Honey, there was an accident."

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Janet stood quietly in the elevator, her hand resting on Andy's shoulder. She had explained to him and Cassie about what had happened to Jack. It was a lot for a little boy to take in and he cried at first, but then he bucked up. Andy sat stiff-backed in the chair, and he said in no uncertain terms that he wanted to see his daddy and that he would help his daddy get better. The news hit Cassie hard as well, but she held strong for Andy's sake. The ding of the elevator announced their arrival, they exited and made their way down the hall to Jack's room.

"Do you remember what we've been talking about?" Janet questioned.

"Yes, Aunt Janet. Daddy got hurt really bad. He's in a special part of the hospital and hooked up to lots of scary looking machines. He's deep sleeping and won't be awake when you bring me. He may look scary, but not to be afraid of him 'cuz you are doin' everything you can to help him, ”Andy replied.

"That's right," Janet had to smile at Andy's words. "I just don't want you to be scared when you see him. It can be a little scary you know. Even for adults."

"I can handle it. I just want to see my daddy," Andy said when they stopped just outside Jack's door.

They entered Jack's room to find Sam sitting at his side holding his hand. Andy gasped and Cassie's hand flew up to her mouth when their eyes fell upon him. Janet was right, it was scary, but not the way he thought. It was scary for the simple fact that Jack was so still and quiet. 

Andy's resolve vanished when he took in the full sight of his father's battered body. Tubes and wires going in and out of him, bandages and bruises covered him while the life support machines played their symphony. With a shaky gait, Andy approached the bed and crawled into his mother's arms. 

After giving Sam a hug, Cassie reached a trembling hand over the padded safety rail and grasped Jack's while Andy still sobbed into Sam's shoulder. "Hey, Uncle Jack. It's me, Cassie. Andy's here too." Cassie made her voice as cheerful as she possibly could. "You gotta wake up and be okay."

Andy stood straight and wiped his nose and eyes with the tissue that Sam had given him. With a deep breath, he walked up to his father's side and put a tremulous hand on Jack's arm in between the bandages. "Dad? I'm glad you're home," Andy said, his voice cracking with emotion. “Daddy, please wake up! Me and Mommy need you." It was all that Andy got out before he broke down in tears, his skinny frame shaking hard with sobs. 

Sam pulled her son into her arms to comfort him.


	9. Chapter 9

General Hammond had departed a little after midnight to see if there was any word from Major Davis on the investigation that had been launched into the Tritaria mission, leaving the teammates alone with their injured CO. Teal'c stood at the foot of Jack's bed, while Sam and Daniel were in the chairs at both sides. Andy was still curled up on Sam's lap, fast asleep and still sobbing.

"Jack was going to retire after this mission so he could stay at home with Andy," Sam spoke suddenly and quietly, one hand ghosting over the back of Jack's hand while the other was wrapped protectively around her son's back.

"Uh, what?" Daniel stammered as he looked up from writing in a fresh journal that he had brought in from his car, a confused and shocked expression painted on his tear-stained face.

"We had talked about it Saturday night and when he got up Sunday morning, he woke me with a smile on his face saying that he made up his mind. He said that he had gotten a second chance with me and Andy and he wasn't going to blow it," she said in a flat almost robotic tone, her eyes never leaving Jack.

"You are okay with that?" Daniel asked.

Sam sobbed as she nodded, grabbing another tissue from the box on the bedside table.

"I'm sorry, Sam. I didn't mean to say it that way," Daniel apologized.

"It's okay, Daniel," Sam said then gave him a little smile. "I understand what happened with Sara and Charlie. He's given enough of himself to the Air Force, but I ruined it. I messed up and nearly got Jack killed."

Daniel stood up and went around to Sam'side of Jack's bed. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder in an embrace. Her resolve vanished like smoke in the wind, and she laid her forehead on the thick plastic safety rail on Jack's bed and let her emotions go. 

Her body wracked with sobs as Teal'c came up beside her and rested a strong hand on her back. "You were trying to help the woman, Major Carter. It was not in your intentions to get O'Neill injured," Teal'c said. "I do not believe that he would hold you to any fault."

"He's right, Sam," Janet's quiet voice came from the doorway. She walked up to Sam and laid a comforting hand on her shoulder. "You've all been through hell and I know that you want to be here for Jack, but you need to rest. If you get sick you' ll be no good to him or to Andy. Now let me take Andy and put him to bed while you go and get cleaned up. ”

"But..." Sam began to protest as Janet hefted the sleeping eight-year-old from her lap.

"No buts about it, Sam. Now, they put family living quarters in the rooms for a reason. Get a shower and then get some sleep," Janet said giving them a 'You'd better listen to me or else!' look. "I arranged for a nurse to bring some extra scrubs in for all of you."

"Mommy?" Andy asked sleepily.

"Yes, sweetheart?" Sam said, soothingly rubbing his back.

"If something happens with Daddy during the night, ya promise to wake me up?" the little boy asked not even opening his eyes.

"Yes, honey. I'll wake you if something happens with Daddy, but nothing's going to happen. Okay?" Sam replied while fresh tears rolled down her cheeks.

Janet shot Sam a heart wretched look and began to pat Andy's back.

"I will remain with O'Neill," Teal'c volunteered.

Sam and Daniel followed Janet into the living area like two mindless zombies, physically and mentally exhausted. Janet laid Andy on one of the three small beds in the room and tucked him in. It was at that time that a young nurse brought in a stack of teal scrubs, setting them in the family room before leaving. Assured they were going to get cleaned up and go to bed, Janet went back out to check Jack over. 

Teal'c maintained his stance at the foot of Jack's bed, his eyes never leaving Jack.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Daniel sat on the edge of the bed. He couldn't sleep so he decided to write more in his journal. With his pen poised on the paper, an idea struck him. He quietly put his pen and journal on his bed and went out to his car. When he came back into Jack's room, he noticed Teal'c looking at him with a questioning expression. "Sorry, Teal'c. I was writing and I got an idea for something to do for Jack. I got my camera and another journal out of my car. I thought that we could make him a book for when he wakes up. We could write in it everyday about what is going on or what we are thinking, and every now and then take pictures so he knows what happened while he was sleeping," Daniel prattled nervously.

"That is a good idea, Daniel Jackson. O' Neill will be most curious as to what he had missed," Teal'c replied with a forced smile.

Teal'c stood up and stepped away from the bed as Daniel readied his vintage Polaroid camera. He snapped a picture of Jack, catching it as it slid out of the camera. He shook it until it fully developed and then stuck it inside the journal. Daniel looked up toward Jack, and tears began to well in his eyes once more.

"Perhaps you should try to rest more, Daniel Jackson. O' Neill will need us when he awakens," Teal'c said. His deep voice was low yet enough to snap Daniel back into the present.

"Huh? Oh, yeah. I guess your right. Wake me up in a few hours so I can relieve you with Jack."

Teal'c nodded as Daniel turned to go back into the family living quarters. Daniel sat on the bed and looked at Sam's sleeping form on the bed across from his. Janet had given her a sedative to make her sleep, her eyes still puffy from crying herself to sleep. He picked up his pen and began to write in what he labeled 'Jack's Journal'.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Sunday, May 19, 2002

Oh, Jack, I'm sorry that this happened to you. We’re here at the USAF Academy Hospital in the family living quarters attached to your room in the ICU. I couldn't sleep so I got an idea to start this journal for you. I guess you could say that it'll serve two purposes, one to let us get some things out of our heads and two, to keep a record of the things that happen with you so that when you wake up you will know everything. We all know how you have to know everything.

I guess I'll start things off by telling you all of your injuries and there are a lot of them. You have: seven broken ribs - three on the left and four flail on the right (one of the ribs punctured your right lung), both hips dislocated and your right pelvic girdle is fractured, depressed skull fracture. They removed that part of your skull and will replace it with a plate later when the swelling in your brain goes away. You've got a linear fracture on the back of your skull, second and third degree burns and lacerations to the bottoms of both of your feet, stab wounds and burns to both of your shins, bruising and swelling to your brain; most damage was to your right frontal lobe, but there is damage to other places as well, plus, there was time when your brain didn't get enough oxygen so Janet said that you suffered anoxia; bad bruising that covers nearly the entire right side of your face and most of your body, welts on your chest, stomach, arms, and legs. All were badly infected. Both of your wrists and ankles are rubbed raw from the shackles. You have fractured tibia and fibula in your right shin which will be in traction for a while and fractured fibula in your left leg.

You are badly dehydrated and you lost a lot of blood, not to mention the bad infections and the very high fever. You were in shock when we got back from the planet. Janet has been pumping blood and fluids into you.

You are hooked up to so many machines; a heart monitor with four leads, a drainage tube in the right side of your chest to drain the air and blood from your chest cavity so your lung stays inflated, an atrial line which measures your blood pressure and blood oxygen levels, a central venous line in the side of your neck which measures your central venous pressure and allows long term fluid and medication delivery. They can also use this to take blood samples. Then there's a regular IV in your right arm, NG tube in your nose to feed you, a breathing tube in your mouth, a monitor attached to your skull by a bolt to measure the pressure inside your head, and a shunt that runs from your brain to your neck for draining the excess blood and fluid from your brain.

You are naked except for a cloth over your groin. Dr. Ward said that it's because they need to cool your fever and that your being cold also helps lower the swelling in your brain.

Janet said that it was tricky bracing your legs because of the burns on your feet, so they put a soft cast on it with your feet free. The broken parts of your legs are now stabilized with that and the traction ramp, but they can get access to treat the burns on your feet.

You have a large bandage from the edge of your neck to bottom of your stomach from the surgery. There is also one near the chest tube. There is a long one alongside your right hip from the surgery they did to it. The gauze wrapped around your head looks like a turban with a little extra padding where the bone section was taken out. With all of the machines and bandages you barely have any room for us to touch you. If we're careful, we can hold your right hand and whoever is on your left can rub your bicep or hold your fingers. Dr. Ward told us that touch is important for people in a coma. I guess it helps to keep you comforted and oriented. Janet put tape on your eyes to keep them closed, especially your right one because it was swollen so badly that it was opened into a slit. She said it will help keep them moist while you are sleeping.

It's after three in morning so that means you were brought here to the hospital twelve hours ago. We got back from the planet around one-thirty yesterday afternoon and you were brought here by helicopter about forty-five minutes after that. You spent nearly eight hours in surgery.

So, now we wait and pray. It's so hard seeing you like this, Jack. The way they have you laying in your bed, if it weren't for all the medical paraphernalia and you being naked, it would almost look like you were lounging in an armchair. Stupid thought I know, but right now that thought is all that is keeping my head on straight. It's just not fair.

Cassie brought Andy in to see you right after they brought you up to your room. He fell asleep on Sam's lap with his hand on your arm. He's quite the little man, Jack. He acts just like you in a lot of ways. He cried a little when he saw you, but he put on a brave face just like you do. He's sleeping here tonight. Cassie tried to take him back home, but he threw a fit. He flat out refused to leave his dad's side. Janet thought it would be good for him to at least stay tonight since... well let's just not go there.

You are a good man, Jack, and yet it seems that shit always happens to you. I'm scared of losing you. You are more than my friend, Jack, you are the big brother I never had. Please, please live. I know that it's not fair to ask you to fight anymore, but I'm begging you to.

Daniel

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The next morning when the nurses came in to tend to Jack, Sam planted a soft kiss on his cheek and backed away from the bed. Tears streamed from her eyes while she watched them change the bandages on his feet. The sight of the burns took her breath away. Between the severity of the burns and subsequent debridement, there didn't seem to be much flesh left on the soles of his feet. Flashes of Aceaus holding the hot coals to Jack's feet and his grunts of pain assaulted her memory while she intently watched Jack's face for any reaction when they rubbed an ointment on the burns, but to her dismay there was not so much as a twitch. After bandages were changed and medication was given, they gently shifted his position on the bed then took their leave.

"Oh, God. Jack. I'm so very sorry that this happened to you. This is all my fault!" Sam said tearfully, taking his hand in hers. As she leaned over to kiss his forehead, a slight cough snapped her to attention, and she spun around. "Sir? I'm sorry I didn't hear you come in."

"It's alright Major," General Hammond addressed her and looked sadly down at the Base's Vice Commander. “How is he?"

"There hasn't been any change, Sir," Sam said then swallowed hard. She could hear the nervous tension in her voice.

"How's Andy handling it?" Hammond asked. He had become a surrogate grandpa to Andy over the past three years that he'd been on Earth.

"He's scared of losing his daddy, but he's trying to be brave like Jack would be," she said then sniffed. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, she began to talk with a shaky voice. "Daniel and Teal'c took him down to the cafeteria for lunch. Cassie is coming to take him home at four. I had Janet call the school and tell them that he'll be missing a few days."

"Don't hesitate to let me know if there is anything that you and Andy need," George offered in a comforting tone and put his hand on her shoulder.

She turned to him and he wrapped his arms around her in fatherly hug. His simple act of comfort allowed her to once again let her emotions flow. He rubbed her back in comfort as she cried and sobbed into his shoulder, his own eyes misting up. A few minutes later Sam jerked away from him in shock, realizing that she had just let loose in the Base's CO's shoulder. Her face turned a rose red in embarrassment. "I'm sorry, sir," Sam stammered. She reached over to get a tissue from the box on Jack's bedside table, using it to dry the tears from her eyes and wipe her nose.

"No harm done ,Major," George said in a consoling voice.

"Yes, Sir. Thank you," She looked lovingly down at Jack, wishing that he would've been awake.

"Sam, there's something that I need to tell you," Hammond said quietly, swallowing his emotions down.

Sam looked confused. "Sir?"

"I talked to the President a few weeks ago about retiring. The day after you guys left for the planet, I got the papers. Jack was promoted to Brigadier General. He was to take over the SGC."

A large lump of emotion formed in Sam's throat, threatening to choke her. Yet again, she found herself crying. Jack had finally made it to General and one stupid mistake took it all away from him, a mistake that she had made. George put a comforting arm around her shoulders.

"Before I came here when Jack was admitted, I called the President to inform him of the circumstances. He agreed that, despite the everything that's happened, the promotion stands. Whatever happens from this point on, Jack is officially a General," he told her softly, but with extreme pride.

Hammond couldn't stop the broad smile that spread across his lips or the pride swelling in his heart at the news, but, as he looked down at Jack's inert form, sadness gripped his heart. He just wished that for once things would go good for Jack and that he could enjoy it. Jack finally got to marry the woman he loved, got another chance at being a father, and was promoted to General, yet he was laying in a hospital bed fighting just to live. Life can be so damned cruel.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Daniel and Teal'c were in the family living quarters sleeping and the nurses had just been in to tend to Jack's needs, so Sam took the time to just sit quietly with her husband. As she stared at the battered features of his face, her thoughts went back to when they were stuck in Antarctica. He had had a similar bruise on the same side of his face then and even though it was a painful memory, it gave her a renewed sense of hope. He'd been near death then and survived, so he could do it again. That was a recurring sad fact when it came to the life of Jack O'Neill, too many near death experiences for one man to endure. Yet, if meant that he would save someone, he'd do it again without question. That was a lot of what made her love him, his heart. The sound of someone entering the room took Sam from her reverie.

"Hey, Janet," Sam greeted.

"Hey, Sam. How's it going?" Janet returned the greeting as she approached the right side of Jack's bed.

Sam stood and moved over to the other side of Jack's bed to make room for Janet, putting her hand gently on Jack's shoulder to let him know that she was still there.

"Whatcha doing?" Sam asked when she saw Janet cutting Jack's hospital ID bracelet off.

"Well, I had a talk with General Hammond a while ago and he informed me that Jack is a General now. So, I went down to admissions and had them make him a new bracelet with his new rank on it. We can't have a General getting Colonel level treatment now, can we? "Janet replied as she worked at getting the new bracelet on Jack's right wrist just below the bandages. "There we go, all set. Here, Sam, do you want this to put in his book that Daniel made for him?"

Sam took the bracelet from Janet and smiled at the comment Janet made, she appreciated Janet's attempt to cheer her up. She looked back at Jack, losing herself in the rhythm of the machines attached to him. She watched silently as Janet went about checking him over and adjusting the many IV lines that went into his body. When Janet had finished she looked up to Sam and gave her a gentle smile.

"Everything looks good. How are you holding up?" Janet asked Sam.

"I'm fine."

"Well, just make sure that you get enough sleep, Andy needs you now and Jack's going to need you when he wakes up."

"I will, Janet."

"You'd better or I'll give you another sedative," Janet threatened then gave Sam a wink.

Sam smiled at her and gave a little wave as she left the room. She stood and went back over to Jack's right side, sitting down in the chair at his bedside. Tears began to form in her eyes and her lips turned into a little smile when she read his name off of the new bracelet: General O' Neill, Jonathan.


	10. Chapter 10

George Hammond studied the appearance of his unconscious 2IC, his eyes scanning the livid bruises and scratches that covered his face and body. There were no lines of pain, no movement, only an eerie calm. Calm and still were not usually in one's list of adjectives when describing Jack O' Neill, a man who couldn't sit still for any length of time. He leaned over the bed and took Jack's limp hand in his own, placing gentle pressure on it as if giving Jack strength to recover.

“Everything is going good at the SGC. Well, as good as usual. Though, I must say that it's too quiet around there without you." George's voice was quiet. Heavy emotion gripped at him as he leaned over the thick plastic rail of Jack's bed, after a steadying breath he continued with a shaky voice, "Jack, you' re like a son to me. I've been extremely honored to have served with you. You need to wake up, son. No matter what happens we just want you back with us."

A small tear crept from George's eye and slowly tracked its way down his face. He didn't care whether or not this was conduct unbecoming a general. His only care was that Jack would live, disabled or not. He sat in silence, rubbing the back of Jack's hand in comfort.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Tuesday, May 21, 2002

Well, Jack, you made it through the critical forty-eight hour period. Not that we doubted that you could do it, but you did have us worried. You were hurt pretty badly.

Sam is sitting by your bed sleeping with her hand resting on your arm. She hasn't gone to bed since the first night you were admitted and Janet forced her. None of us have really slept. I know that I'm afraid that if I fall asleep we'll lose you. I'm pretty sure that everyone else thinks that way.

Cassie finally got Andy to go home with her today. Janet told him that you needed to rest so you would get better and that you'd want him to be a good boy and go to school. Cassie said that she would take him to the store to get you a present and some art supplies to make you pictures for your room. That seemed to make him happy. So, after saying goodbye to you for twenty minutes straight, he gave you a kiss and let Cassie take him home.

Keep fighting, Jack.  
Daniel

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sargeant Yesnik nervously poked his head in the doorway of Jack's room, his eyes falling upon the still form on the bed. Sam was at Jack's side with her head resting on the safety rail in sleep. Quietly, he made his way in and put the basket of flowers that he had brought on the windowsill. He tried hard not to disturb the Major, but when he approached Jack's bed his foot bumped the trashcan and she woke with a start. "I'm sorry, Major. I tried not to wake you," Yesnik apologized timidly.

“It’s okay, Sergeant," Sam replied before a big yawn cracked her face. "Hmm. Sorry."

"No problem, Ma'am. So-uh, how's he doing?"

"He's holding on. Dr. Fraiser said that she'll take the chest tube out later," she told him as she caressed the back of Jack's hand.

"That's good. So then he's improving?" Yesnik asked with his eyes glued to Jack's pale form.

"He has a very long way to go, but yes. He's well on his way," she replied wondering who she was trying to convince more, Yesnik or herself.

"Colonel O'Neill is a fighter, Ma'am."

"Yes, he is, but, Jack's a General now. His promotion came in while we were on the planet and the President decided to let it stand", Sam told him with a hint of pride, well okay it was more than a hint.

"Oh. Uh-th-that's great!" Yesnik stammered. "Well, I-I'd better be going. I'm on duty in the control room today."

"Thanks for stopping by. Jack would appreciate it."

"Get better soon, Sir," Yesnik said as he placed a hand on Jack's shoulder. With a nod of respect he made his way from the room.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Wednesday, May 22 , 2002

Janet took your chest tube out and put a hospital gown on you. Daniel said that he could just hear you complaining about having to wear a dress that left your bare ass hanging out. It was a good laugh that we all desperately needed. I must admit that it's a pretty colored dress. It's light blue with smears of dark blue and pink. The seams are deep blue. There are a row of snaps that run from your neck to the edge of the sleeve on both sides. Janet said that its to make it easier to get it off in case something happens. Please, Jack, don't let anything happen.

Your fever has finally started to go down. Janet was worried that the antibiotic wasn't taking care of all the infection quick enough, but, as usual, you showed her differently. She ordered breathing treatments for you too because you are sounding a bit congested. So, the nurses are coming in here more often. Dr. Ward was here a while ago to check on you. They did another MRI of your brain. The swelling is still bad, but it did go down a little. He said that it'll be a few more days until he can even think about taking the drain out.

General Hammond came this morning. He said that Major Davis found evidence that the mission to Tritaria was a set up. After we told them about what happened, Davis came up with the theory that someone using a mimic device posed as you and made the check-ins while we on the planet. So, Hammond ordered Sergeant Harriman to run a diagnostic on the dialing computer to see where the signal came from when they did the check-ins. That's why no one came to rescue us. So, now there is a full investigation going on.

Andy made enough pictures for you to cover a whole wall. He's been such a trooper. Janet and Cassie have been taking care of him at their house and he likes it there. George has next weekend off and he asked if Andy could spend that weekend with him. He said that he's going to visit his daughter and take Tessa and Kayla to the zoo. Andy is all excited about going with Grandpa George and the girls. He's been doing good in school. It's hard to believe that summer vacation starts in two weeks.

Oh, Jack, I wish that you would wake up. I love you and I miss talking to you. We have been taking turns writing in this journal for you, even Andy. One of the nurses took a picture of all us of around your bed. I can't wait until you see it. I just wished that it would been taken at home instead of here, like this.

I love you my darling. Please wake up!  
Sam

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Thursday, May 23, 2002

You gave us quite a scare today, Jack. You had a pretty bad seizure and pulled some of your wires loose. Janet said that she is going to try another anti-seizure medicine and see if it works better. She put bumper pads like the one in a baby's crib over the safety rails so when you hit them during a seizure, you won't hurt yourself. Thankfully, you didn't re-hurt yourself with this one.

Your temperature is going back up a little, not much, but enough to make us worry. Janet thinks that you may have a minor lung infection. I hope not. Enough bad has happened to you.

With love,  
Sam


	11. Chapter 11

Daniel walked quietly up to Jack's bed and sat down at his right side. With a tremulous hand, he reached up and took Jack's hand into his. Even though it had been a week since Jack was admitted to the hospital, it was still hard to see him in such horrible condition.

“Jack. I just wanted to thank you for everything that you have done for me the past few years. You have saved my ass more times than I could ever begin to count and never once did you tell me that I owed you. I'm proud to call you a friend," Daniel paused and wiped the tears that crept from his eyes. He swallowed hard to steady his voice before he continued. “I’m really happy for you and Sam. The two of you deserve to be happy and to have each other. I still haven't taken your advice about talking to Janet yet. I don't think it is the appropriate time to because of what happened to you. You know you can wake up and yell at me anytime you want to. Like now would be good."

Daniel stared at Jack with a hopeful expression, waiting and watching for any sign that Jack was waking. Nothing. Daniel bowed his head and sobbed. His heart began to ache when he thought back to the trial when his friend's pain was other people's entertainment.

Daniel jumped when a small hand touched his shoulder, he was so deep in thought that he hadn't noticed the young nurse enter the room.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Jackson. I didn't mean to scare you," the nurse said in a quiet voice.

"Its okay, Kelly," Daniel replied as he swiped a stray tear from his cheek.

"It's time to give the General his medication and change his bandages."

Daniel gave Jack's hand one more gentle squeeze before he stepped back out of the way. With a heavy heart, he walked quietly into the family living area and poured himself a cup of coffee. Careful not to wake Sam, he sat at the small dining table near the cot where she slept and began to flip through a copy of an archaeology magazine though his mind was still on Jack.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Sunday, May 25, 2002

Your fever rose a little more and your lungs sound more congested. Janet said that if things are still the same in the morning she's going to do a chest x-ray to be sure that you aren't getting pneumonia. She started you on another antibiotic just to get ahead with whatever is going on. Oh, Jack, why can't you ever get a break?

Andy misses you, Jack. I miss you. Please, please wake up.

Love,  
Sam

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Monday, May 26, 2002

I ask again, will you ever get a break? It is pneumonia. Janet has you on a strong antibiotic that should take care of it. Thankfully it's a mild case, but you are back in critical condition. The respiratory therapist comes four times a day now to give you breathing treatments. Janet said that'll help as well.

I'm in the family living quarters because Janet and the nurses are with you now. After Janet finishes checking you over, the nurses will bathe and shave you. Even though you have a special mattress to prevent pressure sores, they still shift your position. It scares me when they move you around. You look like a limp rag doll. I wonder if it hurts you or if you even realize that they're doing it. Janet said that they think that people in comas are aware of what is going on around them. So now I hope that they aren't hurting you.

Jack, please get better and wake up.

Love,  
Sam

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

"It's been two weeks, he should have been dead by now!" the older man growled, slamming his fist down hard onto his desk.

"I thought so too, but he's still alive. The Doc says that even though he has pneumonia he's actually starting to improve," the young man's voice was nervous.

"I should've expected as much. That son of a bitch is too stupid to give up," the older man spat.

"Do you want me to finish him off?"

"No! It's too soon. We can't risk getting caught. They already suspect that it was a set up."

"So what do we do?"

"Just get the hell out of there. Dye your hair back to the way it was and get your ass back here. Make sure you burn the contacts. As far as I know from this end, they don't know who you really are so you'll be safe."

"What about the others? Should I contact them?"

"No. Just come back here and we'll figure out what to do. I'll get a hold of the others when we come up with a plan."

"Okay. I'll pack and be out of here tonight."

"I'll have a plane ticket waiting for you at the airport."

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Janet stood up straight and stretched her aching back. She had just finished checking Jack over and health wise, he was doing good. With a heavy sigh she picked up his chart and walked toward the family room to talk to Sam. She swallowed hard when she saw the hopeful expression on Sam's face. God, do these things ever get any easier?

"How's he doing?" Sam asked.

"So far he's doing fine. His recovery is going great considering what he's been through," Janet replied though in her mind she was trying to come up with the easiest way to break the news that she had. With a deep breath, she continued, "Sam, it's been two weeks and Jack isn't showing any signs of waking. At this point he's still not able to breathe in his own. If he doesn't wake up by tomorrow, I'm going to have to perform a tracheotomy and put his breathing tube through his neck directly into his trachea."

Sam felt like she had been hit head on by a runaway freight train.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sam took a sip of her coffee and sat back down on the table before she dropped it, her hands were shaking like there was there was an earthquake going on inside of them. Daniel had brought her to the cafeteria for coffee while they did the tracheotomy on Jack. She couldn't stand the thought of being close by while they cut at Jack's throat even though they were doing it to help him. She wished that he would've woken up by now so that they didn't have to put a breathing tube into his neck. The wait was hard on her; she wanted to be with Jack when it was done.

An hour later, they headed back up to Jack's room. The procedure had long been completed, but Janet had asked that they wait an hour before returning so that they could do his check up afterwards. Sam nervously walked into Jack's room and up to the bed. She put her hand over her mouth to stifle a gasp when she saw the tracheotomy tube and the blue collar that wrapped around his neck to hold it in place, tears rolling down her cheeks. She reached down and gently ran her hand across his now bare cheek. It was the first time that she had got to touch it in three and a half weeks. His lips were closed into a thin line and Sam couldn't help but lean over to lay a chaste kiss on them.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal; Monday, June 3, 2002

It's been two days since you got your tracheotomy. Andy asked about a million questions about it when he first saw it. His main worry was if it hurt when they did it and if it was hurting you now. Janet explained to him that it was helping you breath and it was better for you than the one that was in your mouth. It saddens me when I see it, but at least now I can give you a proper kiss.

Daniel, Teal'c, and I got called back to the SGC. Hammond said that he couldn't justify the time off for all of us to Washington. I took my vacation time so I could stay with you a little longer. Daniel and Teal'c will come visit when they can.

Everyone at the SGC has either sent a card or have come to visit. Those that came to visit wrote you a little note in here. I hope that you don't mind, but I read over some of them. They are so sweet. You mean a lot to a lot of people, Jack, whether you want to believe it or not. We all miss you.

The new seizure medicine seems to be working because you haven't had one in a while except for a few little tremors. You've been doing good health wise the last few days.

Andy is so excited that school is over on Wednesday. He's kept a countdown on the calendar on your wall. He is so much like you that I could swear he was your biological son.

Love,  
Sam

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Wednesday, June 5, 2002

Hey, Jack! It's me, Daniel. Sam went home with Andy since it's the last day of school. They'll both be in later to see you. So it's just you and me here.

Yesnik disappeared the day after he came to see you. We've been looking for him, but there's been no sign of him yet. We did find out that Dean Yesnik isn't what his name really is, it's Dane Kinsey. I found it out totally by accident. I was reading over a report and saw a reflection of his name in my coffee cup. Major Davis did some digging and found out that he is Senator Kinsey's son from a previous marriage and he isn't even military. God, Jack. I'm so sorry. I should have seen this coming.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Daniel's hand trembled slightly as he rubbed the lip balm on Jack's dry lips. The nurses had just been in to change, bathe, and shave Jack. Sam and Teal'c were in the family quarters sleeping since it was Daniel's turn to sit with Jack. When he finished spreading the balm, Daniel sat back down in his chair and grasped Jack's limp hand into his own.

"Come on, Jack. It's been a month now. Time to wake up. You've slept long enough." Daniel swallowed hard to steady his voice and fight back the tears that were forming. "We miss you, Jack. Sam and Andy miss you."

Nothing. Not even a twitch. Disappointment and worry flooded Daniel's mind. He may not have been a medical doctor, but even he knew that the longer a person was in a coma, the bleaker the outcome could become. The fact that the severely injured man in the coma was his best friend didn't help. Daniel said a silent prayer that Jack would soon wake and that he would have the ability to recover.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sunday, June 16, 2002

Happy Father's Day, Dad! I made ya a card and picture. I hung them on the wall so that you can see them when ya wake up. I brought ya presents, too. I put them on the table for you to open when you can. Mommy brought you some pretty flowers and some balloons. One of the balloons has Homer Simpson on it and it says Happy Father's Day!

It's been two years ago today that you had adopted me. Mommy said that you officially became a daddy on Father's Day. I wish that you woulda been awake to celebrate with us. Guess we can wait til ya wake up.

Grandpa George said that Tessa and Kayla want me to stay at their house next week and go to Bible School with them. Mommy said that it was okay. I can't wait to go again. I had so much fun last year. Ya remember that picture frame that I made you out of macaroni noodles last year at Bible School and you put that picture of me and you at the hockey game in it? Mom put it on the table by your bed. I'm gonna make something again this year.

Thank you for being such a good Daddy to me. I love you very much. I hope that you wake up soon.

Love your son,  
Andy

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sam sat by Jack's bed holding his hand and reading the newspaper to him. She was half way through an article about a charity bazaar when Daniel entered the room. She didn't realize he was there until the article was read and she looked up to rest her eyes.

"Hey, Sam. How's he doing?" Daniel asked as he pushed his glasses up his nose.

"Oh hey, Daniel. He's doing good today. It's about time for the nurses to come in to attend to him," Sam replied as she looked back down at Jack. "How did things go with the hearing?"

"Well, let's just say that Dane Kinsey will be a very old man by the time he gets out of prison. IF, he gets out of prison," Daniel said quietly, yet with a tinge of pride. "Naturally, he denied everything at first, but when he was asked about the classified files from the SGC that he had on him when the DC Police arrested him, he fessed up. Dane rolled over on the others at the SGC and the Russians. Hammond thinks that things will be pretty rough on them as well."

"What about Senator Kinsey and the other people involved?"

"Nothing's for sure yet, but rumor has it that Kinsey's going to resign," Daniel replied as he sat down on the opposite side of Jack's bed.

"What about the guy on the planet with the mimic device?" Sam asked apprehensively, not being too quick to accept that it was totally over. Past experiences proved that it was virtually impossible for the bad guys to up and just go away. The story always goes - just as you think you have them all, BAM! They come back for one more round.

"Yes, Sam, they got him too. He was arrested along with three others in the Russian Stargate Program. They found the mimic device in his apartment when it was searched, along with some..." Daniel stopped dead silent. Major whoops. He wasn't supposed to tell Sam about the pictures. He silently cursed himself for starting to let it slip because he knew full well that Sam wouldn't let it go until she got it out of him.

"Daniel?" Sam inquired, giving Daniel the full force of her 'spill your guts or else' glare. "Along with some what?"

"Uh," Daniel stammered. What were the right words to tell your friend that there were pictures of her husband's torture and near death in the hands of one of their worst enemies? "Pictures, Sam. Apparently, he wasn't there to just do the check-ins. He had taken pictures of us on the planet. Especially of Jack."

Sam held her hand up to stop him. She didn't need to hear what the pictures were because she knew. She swallowed the huge lump in her throat as she looked down at Jack. Now more than ever she wanted to wrap her hands around Kinsey's neck and squeeze the life out of the bastard. "So they got everyone involved then?" Sam asked quietly.

"Yes, Sam, they got everybody involved. Jack's safe now," Daniel said. He understood the worry and anger that Sam felt, because he too felt it.

Sam let out a huge sigh of relief. It was over and those who were responsible would pay for their part in what happened to Jack. She only wished that Aceaus was here on Earth so that he too would pay. She picked up Jack's limp hand and brought it to her lips, kissing it softly.

"Did anyone say why they did this?" Sam asked, not taking her eyes off of Jack.  
"Apparently, Dane hadn't had much of a relationship with Kinsey growing up even though he idolized him," Daniel rolled his eyes at that, wondering how anyone could idolize a weasel like Robert Kinsey. "When he grew up, he came to Colorado and found Kinsey. They had a bit of a rocky start at rebuilding a relationship. So, he did some research and found out what a pain in Kinsey's ass Jack was. He came up with a plan to get back at Jack to get in Kinsey's good graces and it worked, at first. Kinsey loved what he came up with and helped him put the plan into motion."

Just as he finished the sentence, the nurses came in to take care of Jack.

"Come on, Sam. Let's go grab some breakfast while we wait," Daniel offered.

"Okay," Sam agreed. She stood and kissed Jack's forehead before making her way to the cafeteria with Daniel.


	12. Chapter 12

Sam snapped upright in her chair, her face covered in sweat and her breath came in hitched sobs. She wiped a tear from her eye and looked at her unconscious husband making sure that he was safe. It was only dream, a horrible memory. With a shaky hand she reached over the thick safety rail and grabbed Jack's hand. Her heart rate finally began to slow and her breathing steadied. She couldn't help but wonder if the nightmares would ever stop. With a deep breath she stood and leaned over to give Jack a kiss on his lips. "Please wake up, Jack."

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

It was a bright and sunny Saturday morning, Janet and Dr. Ward were in Jack's room examining him. It had been five weeks since SG-1 returned from their mission to Tritaria and Jack still remained in a coma. Day after day Sam, Teal'c, and Daniel took shifts sitting with Jack, even George Hammond took a few turns, Andy would prattle on about what he had been doing and anything else that popped into his head. They read to him and talked to him about the weather or the news reports from the day, pleaded with him to wake up. Each day the nurses came and went, giving him medication, changing his bandages, bathing him, and shifting his body position on the bed. His room was beginning to look like a floral shop, quickly filling with flowers, balloons, and stuffed animals. Even the kids at Andy's school where Jack had made many visits had sent him handmade cards and a big banner that read "Get Well Soon, Jack!" . Everyone hoped that he would wake up and yell about the childishness of it all.

Sam, Daniel, and Teal'c sat around the table in the family quarters waiting anxiously for news, periodically glancing out at Jack's curtained off bed. It seemed like an eternity before Janet and Dr. Ward finished and came to give them the news.

"He's definitely showing some improvement. I'm hopeful that it'll only be a matter of time before he begins to emerge from the coma," Dr. Ward's deep voice was full of optimism.

There was a collective sigh of relief in the room; it was indeed good news.

"Any idea when you can put the plate in his skull?" Sam asked.

"No, I'm sorry. The swelling has reduced, but it still has a long way to go yet. That could take a few more weeks. Maybe even months," Dr. Ward explained.

"Is he going to be okay when he wakes up?" Daniel asked.

"There is significant injury to his brain and he did suffer from some anoxia. So there will be some disability. We won't know for sure what or how bad until he wakes up and we can test him," Dr. Ward answered somberly. This was the hardest part of his job, telling families that their loved one will never be the same again.

It was difficult to hear that Jack would never be the same, but he was alive and for that they were extremely grateful.

"When will he have the next surgery on his leg and hips?" Sam asked looking at Janet with tear filled eyes.

"It will be a while yet. I'd like to wait until he wakes up. I don't want to risk putting him under anesthetic unnecessarily while he is still in the coma and the swelling to his brain is still so bad," Janet replied. Her heart broke at seeing the forlorn expression on Sam's face. She desperately wished that she could make Jack better and tell her friends what they wanted to hear. Reality really sucks sometimes, she thought.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Monday morning Janet was at Jack's bedside doing her usual exam. It had been forty-four days since Jack lapsed into the coma and she was hoping that he would soon show some signs of waking. Most of his physical injuries were healed almost completely and the burns on his feet were healing nicely as well. Dr. Ward was still concerned with the bruising and swelling to Jack's brain, however. Jack only had a few mild seizures over the past few weeks so it seemed that the medication was controlling them. 

Sam sat in the chair by Jack's bed and watched every move that Janet made. She cringed as she watched Janet remove the tape from Jack's eyes.

"Come on, Jack. We're waiting for you to wake up," Janet said and rubbed her hand gently across his cheek.

"Is he okay?" Sam asked quietly.

"He's doing as well as can be expected, better than most people would be with the injuries that he had," Janet replied as she jotted notes in Jack's chart. She glanced at her watch then turned her attention to Sam. "Well I'm going to get going. I'm on duty at the SGC this afternoon and I have to stop at the house to check on Cassie and Andy. I promised Andy they could order pizza for supper tonight since he's been helping out around the house."

"You are going to have him totally spoiled!" Sam said with a smile.

"Hey, that's what aunts are for," Janet replied with a grin. "Well I better go. I'll be back to check on Jack on my way home tonight ."

"See you later, Janet. Tell Andy that Mommy loves him and I'll call him later."

"I will, "Janet said with a teasing grin and disappeared down the hall.

Sam leaned over Jack's bed. "You need to wake up and help me out here, Jack. I can't come up with great comebacks like you can," she said then kissed him on the lips. "Jack, please wake up. I miss talking to you."

Reaching down she took a hold of his hand, lifting it up to her lips and lightly peppering it with kisses. Without letting go of his hand, she sat down and studied it. His long slender fingers were curled inward. Suddenly, her eyes widened. Wondering if she was hallucinating, she waited with bated breath. There it was again! She reached up and hit the call button, hardly unable to keep from screaming with joy. Within seconds a nurse rushed in the room.

"Is everything okay, Mrs. O' Neill?" the nurse asked, nearly breathless from her rush to the room.

"Yes! His finger twitched! Three times!" Sam shouted with delight.

"I'll page the doctors." The nurse smiled brightly then left the room.

"That's it, sweetheart. Wake up for me, please. Open your beautiful brown eyes, "Sam pleaded, but received no more of a response. The noise of feet entering the room got her attention. She turned to see Janet and Dr. Ward come rushing in. "Janet. I thought that you left?"

"I was on my way out when I got the page that Jack moved. No way would I miss this!" she replied cheerfully.

"His finger twitched three times, but that was it," Sam told her with excitement.

"Sir? Can you squeeze my hand? Come on, sir. I know that you're in there," Janet said as she leaned over Jack and took his hand in hers, but there was no more movement.

Sam backed away from the bed and let the doctors examine Jack. She couldn't wait until Teal'c and Daniel came back to tell them. Her joy rapidly turned to utter fear when Jack's body began to shake violently .

"It's just a seizure, Sam. He'll be okay," Janet comforted her.

Relief washed over her when it stopped; thankfully it was mild and short. Then something happened that caused all present to gasp in shock. Teal'c and Daniel had just entered the room and stopped dead in their tracks. Jack groaned!

"Jack! Honey, can you open your eyes for me?" Sam said as she rushed up to Jack's bedside and took his hand in hers. "Come on, Jack. You can do it."

Everyone gathered tightly around Jack's bed, staring at him with hopeful anticipation. Sam nearly jumped out of her skin when Jack's eyelids fluttered slightly.

"That's it, Jack. Open those wonderful eyes of yours," Sam urged, biting back her excitement.

His eyes remained closed. It was a bittersweet development; all were glad that there was movement and yet disappointed that Jack had not awakened.

"It'll take time before he will fully awaken. It's normal for patients who have been in a coma as long as he's been," Dr. Ward informed them in a comforting voice.

Daniel let out a disappointed sigh. "How long?"

"It could take days, weeks even before he's fully aware, but, this is a good sign." He glanced down at Jack with a hopeful expression, then turned his attention back to the group. "Keep talking to him like he is awake and encourage him. The reason why we remodeled the ICU here is because it is believed that the family and friends' constant presence is a great boost to a coma patient's recovery. Jack is our first patient in this new program and so far, he's proving that the study was right."

"Well, General O' Neill has beaten the odds many times before and something tells me that this time isn't going to be any different," Janet told him with a smile.

They all smiled and nodded in agreement. They all knew Jack O' Neill. It was the collective hope that he'd soon be cursing the nurses for bothering him and harassing the doctors to go home.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sounds permeated the darkness. Low, muffled drones. What was it? Something was touching him. It had a hold of his hand. He wanted to grab it and pull himself out of the darkness. All he could manage was a few quick twitches of his finger. A louder noise. What's going on? Why is it so dark? He tried to open his eyes, but they were like the rest of his body, didn't want to move. He tried to talk, but all that came out was a groan. He wanted to try more, but he was too tired. He fell back into the darkness.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Janet wrapped the leftover pizza in plastic wrap and put it in the refrigerator before pouring herself a cup of coffee. After turning the coffee pot off, she turned to go into the living room only to find Andy standing in the kitchen doorway.

"Hey, honey, shouldn't you be in bed?" Janet asked the little boy and tousled his hair.

"Aunt Janet, do you think that Daddy will wake up in time to see the fireworks tomorrow?"

"I don't know, sweetheart. I hope so," Janet answered sadly.

"Me, too. Uncle Danny got me a big bag of fireworks, but I wanna save them for when Daddy comes home," Andy said then yawned. "Will Daddy be able to see the fireworks?"

"If he's awake, yeah. They'll be viewable from your Dad's window and if he's awake we can put him in a special chair so he can be near the window to watch them with you. Okay?"

Andy's face lit up like a Christmas tree and he wrapped his arms around Janet's waist. "Yeah, Aunt Janet!"

"Okay, now that we have a deal, I want you in bed young man. You want to be rested up to see your Dad and the fireworks all in the same day, don't you?"

"Yep! Night, Aunt Janet."

"Night, Andy, "Janet said as she watched the little boy go back upstairs. Oh, Jack, please wake up tomorrow, she thought to herself as she went in and sat down on the couch.

The next day after lunch, Andy strolled down the long corridor to his dad's hospital room. One hand held onto Cassie's hand and the other clutched the handle of a large shopping bag. He'd earned some money mowing lawns and helping Janet with chores so he sweet talked Cassie into taking him to the mall where he proudly spent all of his money buying 'get better' presents for his daddy and an 'I love you' present for his mom. As they entered Jack's room Andy hoped that he would find his dad awake and waiting for him. The little boy let out a regretful sigh when he entered to see his dad the same way he was when he had left the hospital the day before.

Jack lay tilted onto his left side on the partially reclined bed, a large prism-shaped pillow behind his back to support him with another similar pillow between his legs. His strong hands were curled inward. The blue breathing tube in his neck shook each time that the machine ran a cycle. Despite the tube in his nose feeding him nutrients, he had lost a lot of weight. The nurse by his bed finished replacing his 'food' bag and after switching the pump back on, she gave the group a comforting smile and left the room. 

Andy put the bag down on the chair and gave his mom a big hug. "Hi, Daddy. I came to watch the fireworks with ya. I brought ya some presents too," Andy said then grabbed his dad's hand and gave it a gentle kiss. He walked over to the bag and paused a minute to decide what to get out first. With a smile, he reached in and pulled out a stuffed golden retriever. The foot high animal had a softy velvety fur and was filled with air beads. "Here, Daddy. I got you this so you would have a friend to sleep with," Andy said happily as he tucked it under Jack's left arm. "You can name him when you wake up."

Andy turned his attention back to the bag, his face scrunched in thought as Sam, Cassie, and Janet watched him. No one saw Jack's eyelids flutter and open into slits, a sliver of velvet brown showing beneath them. 

Andy had finally decided to get out a small Wayne Gretzky action figure that he'd picked out himself. When he turned back to the bed, his eyes widened and the figure plopped to the floor. “Daddy!" Andy squealed, causing Janet and Sam to jump up to the bed.

"Jack? Sir, squeeze my hand if you can hear me," Janet requested softly as she took hold of his left hand, hoping for a response. There was none. His eyes were blank and remained fixed in a dead stare, no movement. One blink. Two blinks. Then they drifted closed once again.

Sam cast a worried glance to Janet.

"It's perfectly normal, Sam. Unlike on TV, a person doesn't become fully aware right away after awakening from a coma."

"Aunt Janet, will you put Daddy in the special chair now so he can see the fireworks?" Andy asked excitedly.

"Yes, I'll put him in a special chair to watch the fireworks with you. A deal's a deal, but, it'll have to be later on okay?" Janet answered.

"Okay!" Andy replied and looked over the rail at Jack. "You get ta watch the fireworks with me now, Daddy."

“I'll go and talk to Dr. Ward about setting up the testing," Janet turned her attention to Cassie before continuing, "Would you stay here with Jack and Andy for a few minutes?"

"Sure, Mom," Cassie replied before she shot Janet the infamous 'What? Do I look like a baby?' look that she had learned from good old Uncle Jack. Janet just smiled at her and breezed out of the room. Sam ducked into the family room to call Daniel and give him the good news.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

He was floating in the darkness, caught in the cobwebs that hung between sleep and consciousness. He felt heavy. The sounds returned, trying to break through the cotton between his ears and them. He wanted to see what the noises were. Someone was lifting his arm up. They put something soft under it. He really wanted to see what was going on. With all the might he had, which wasn't much, he fought his eyes open. It was bright and white. Blurry images appeared before him. It seemed more than he could handle. He was tired. His eyes drifted back closed. Too tired.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

At around eight that night, Janet entered Jack's room pushing something that looked like a combination of a bed and a wheelchair. It had a high back with raised sides and the leg rests were one solid piece with high sides to prevent Jack's legs from sliding off and hitting the wheels. The armrests were wide and stretched out over the wheels to keep Jack's hands from hitting them. Just as she parked it beside Jack's bed, two large orderlies and a nurse entered the room.

"Hey, Jack. It's me, Janet," she greeted him as she walked closer to his bed. “Are you ready to get out of bed?"

Janet motioned for the orderlies to help and untied the padding on the safety rail on Jack's bed and lowered the rail. Janet and the nurse worked on getting Jack's IVs onto the pole that was attached to the back of the wheelchair and the rest of his tubes and wires situated for the transfer. Carefully, the two orderlies lifted Jack up and eased him into the wheelchair. The taller orderly held Jack upright as the shorter one pulled the robe closed and tied it. Janet grabbed the catheter bag from the frame of Jack's bed and attached it to the special hook on the wheelchair. The orderlies fastened the restraint vest around his chest so he didn't fall out of the chair. Once Jack was situated, the orderlies left the room. Janet smiled at Jack while she fidgeted with adjusting his respirator and tubes. The young nurse pushed the ventilator behind the wheelchair as Janet pushed it toward the window.

Andy watched, biting his lip with tear-filled eyes. He was excited that his dad was awake to watch the fireworks with him, but he got a little scared as he watched them move his dad into the wheelchair. The fear quickly faded once the fireworks display began, as the view from Jack's window was breathtaking, and Andy's attention switched between the fireworks and his dad, watching as the bright flashes of light cast colored shadows across Jack's sleeping face.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Thursday, July 4, 2002

Thanks for waking up today, Daddy! I told Mommy that you got awake to see what I got you and see the fireworks with me. I was sad that you can't talk yet. Aunt Janet said that it will be a while before you can and that I gotta be patient. I'm trying, but I miss talking to you, Dad.

I hope that you had fun watching the fireworks with me. You slept most the time, but when you was awake I think you liked them.

I've been being a good boy for Mommy and Aunt Janet and Cassie. I help them clean and everything. Grandpa George is gonna take me, Tessa, and Kayla to the zoo one more time before school starts. I wish that you could go too.

Well I gotta go now. Mom said that we have to go home for the night. I don't want to go. I want to stay with you. Don't worry, I'm going. I don't want Mom to get upset. I love you, Dad.

Love,  
Andy

PS: Mom had ta help me with my spelling a little. She had to read this to do it, so I hope ya don't mind.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Friday, July 5, 2002

You've opened your eyes a few more times since yesterday, but you just stare straight ahead. Dr. Ward called it a semi-wake state. I'm so glad to see your beautiful brown eyes. Every now and again you twitch your fingers and your hands jerk a little. Janet started the process of weaning you off of the ventilator today. She hopes to have you off of it within a week.

Dr. Ward said that he thinks that he'll be able to remove the ICP monitor and drain next week. Your brain is still swollen, but its gone down a bit.

You are doing good, Jack. Keep it up.

Love,  
Sam


	13. Chapter 13

Jack's Journal: Tuesday, July 9, 2002

You are responding a little more to your environment. The nurse was changing the formula bag this afternoon and when she went to put up the fresh one she looked down at you. You were watching every move she made. Sam will have a fit that she missed it! Daniel and Teal'c took her and Andy down to cafeteria for lunch.

Dr. Ward took the pressure monitor and drain out of your head yesterday. The swelling is still there, but its slowly going down.

Dr. Thompson, your orthopedic surgeon, did the surgery on your legs and hips today. Your leg isn't in traction anymore since it's 'fixed', but it's on the therepeutic wedge pillow that they put behind your back when you are on your side so you don't roll back. He also fixed the tendon damage in both of your legs. As far as your hips, he put in a plate and screws for now. Dr. Thompson said that you may need to have a hip replacement done in a few months. There was a lot of scar tissue in the hip sockets that he removed. There was a lot of damage in there, Jack, quite a few nerves were severed. He said that you may be confined to a wheelchair because of the amount of damage to your hips and legs, but with your stubbornness we have faith that you will walk again.

Since your leg is out of traction we put a dark blue sheet and white blanket on you.

Keep fighting, Jack.  
Janet

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Thursday, July 11, 2002

Janet took you off the ventilator today. You did good with it and your oxygen level stayed up. So, she capped off the tracheotomy and put in a nasal oxygen catheter in just to help you keep up your oxygen levels. They'll take the tracheotomy out in three days. Way to go Jack! She wants to keep you in the ICU for a few more days to keep an extra eye on you. If all goes well you'll be moved to the regular neurology floor next Wednesday. You haven't had any problems since the pneumonia, which is very good.

You're staring at me again. I really wish that I knew what you were thinking. I can't help but wonder if you know who I am and if you remember your son. I think you do sometimes because you look at us and I can see the love in your eyes, but, there are times when there is no expression in them at all. Every time someone comes to visit, you just stare at them for a while then go to sleep. Daniel said that you are just being your typical self. I have to agree.

You haven't moved by yourself other than an occasional twitch of your right arm and fingers. It has me worried, but Janet and Dr. Ward assure me that it is normal. That you'll come back in your own good time. Now that is typical you.

I love you, Jack. Thank you for living.

Love,  
Sam

Jack's Journal: Tuesday, July 16, 2002

Well tomorrow is moving day. They removed most of the machines that you were attached to. All you have left is a single IV in your right arm, the Foley catheter (your favorite ), heart monitor, a nasal oxygen catheter, and the NG tube. Dr. Ward removed the bandages from your head as well as the ICP monitor and drain. He put a bootie cap on your head. Now you can see the depression in your head where they removed the damaged part of your skull. Your hair has started to grow back. Its like fuzz. I'm tempted to rub my hands over it, but I'm scared that I'll hurt you.

You have a bandage on your neck where you had the tracheotomy. Janet said that they stitched it closed and put the bandage on it so you don't do anything to it when you move or have a seizure.

I can't seem to stop crying for you. Me, I wish that it wasn't that way, but, my love, I'm worried about you. Will you ever understand? They said that there will be brain damage, but it'll be a few weeks before they can test you to see what the extent of it is. Just remember, Jack, I love you no matter what.

Love always,  
Sam

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's eyes remained fixated on Teal'c as the Jaffa read the newspaper to him. Teal'c kept one strong but gentle hand on Jack's arm and held the paper with the other, taking great care in comforting his warrior brother. It was an odd sight to anyone who passed by the room seeing the large man reading to an injured friend who seemed so small in comparison, but to Teal'c what he was doing was a great honor and he took pride in it. He continued to read each article slowly and carefully until the nurses came in to give Jack his medication. Teal'c stood and moved away from the bed to allow the nurses better access, but his eyes never left Jack.

"I will not be far, O' Neill," Teal'c assured his friend, remembering the fact that Jack would get upset easily if he wasn't in physical or visual contact with those who were familiar to him.

Then something happened that even caught the battle-hardened Jaffa by surprise. Jack raised his right arm! It all began with a small twitch of Jack's hand, almost as if he was searching for something to his whole arm lifting slightly from the mattress. A big smile spread across Teal'c's lips as well as the nurses'. Teal'c stepped forward and grasped Jack's contorted hand. Teal'c's smile widened when Jack turned his eyes to him, then the smile disappeared when sadness flooded Jack's face and a tear fell from the corner of his eye.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sam sat at Jack's bedside with Andy curled up on her lap. Jack had fallen asleep about an hour ago, so they just sat quietly and listened to the heart monitor beep. It was nearly time for Cassie to come pick Andy up to take him home for the night. He wanted to be with his dad on his last night in the ICU and he was content just to watch his father sleep. As he put there, questions about his dad began to swirl around his mind. In the three years that he had been on Earth, he had caught on pretty quickly to things. Things weren't that much different here than on his own planet, except for the technological things like televisions and such. The main difference was medical care. He had never seen a hospital or anything like that until he had come to Earth. When he had first been brought to the hospital when Jack had been admitted, Sam had explained everything to him, what each machine was and what it was doing to help his dad, but as he stood there and watched his father sleep, a few things ate at his mind and he just had to know.

"Mommy, why is that side of Daddy's head dented?" Andy asked timidly, hoping that he hadn't upset his mother with his question.

"Because Daddy hurt his head really badly and the doctor had to take out the broken pieces of bone so they didn't hurt his brain more than it already had," Sam replied, rubbing Andy's arm to let him know that it was okay to ask questions.

"Are the doctors going to fix it?"

"Yes, sweetheart. They just have to wait until the swelling in his brain goes down first," Sam answered.

"Will he be okay?"

"I don't know, honey," Sam said sadly and rubbed her hand across Andy's cheek.

"He'll be okay, Mom. I'll help him," Andy said as he snuggled back down into Sam's chest.

"I know you will. You are such a sweet boy," Sam said with a smile, then tousled Andy's hair.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Wednesday, July 17, 2002

You handled the move okay. You are now in room 160 in the Neurology Ward on the third floor. This is where you'll be until you are discharged. You'll get speech, physical, and occupational therapy here.

You seem to like your new room because you keep looking around. Well, you do when you are awake, which isn't much and not for very long. I took a picture of you after they got you settled in. There were tears coming from your eyes. You can kick my butt for that picture whenever you are ready, okay? The sheets on your bed are the same dark blue. There are no in-room living areas on this floor so we have to go home at night or sleep on the couch.

The walls are white with a blue floral pattern border around the upper wall near the ceiling. There was a large bulletin board on the wall. A big clock with large numbers hung near a table that sat up against the wall. There was an organizer with pens, pencils, and other bits of writing utensils along with tablets on the table. Just off to the right of the door was a spacious bathroom adapted for a disabled person. Each thing in the room had a label on it in big letters and small dry erase boards were attached to various places on the walls. The window stretched the length of the wall and went from the ceiling to about four feet from the floor with white, wide slat blinds instead of curtains. There is a mauve sleeper sofa (the couches that fold out into a bed. I know-Duh, Daniel.) and four matching armchairs. There is a TV hanging on the wall that can be seen from your bed and the chairs, plus a little one that hangs from an arm thing above your bed just for you. There is a small dining table in the middle of the room and a coffee table over by the chairs. They look like the furniture that you have in your house actually.

They put a little shelving unit in the corner for all of your flowers and stuffed animals. As you'll be able to see by the picture I took for you, there are a lot of them. We are worried that if you get any more balloons, your room will float away with all of us in it! (smile). It took the orderlies nearly an hour to move all of them here.

You just had a seizure. It was a mild one. It was the first one in almost two weeks. I guess that's good, not that seizures are ever a good thing. It's good that you don't have them a lot. Oh, boy. I'm rambling. I can just hear you say "Shut up, Daniel!"

Sam's sitting beside you now. She had just gotten out of the shower when you had the seizure. She didn't even dry herself off, just threw her clothes on and came running. Now we can't get her to go put dry clothes on. Janet is telling her that she is going to catch a cold and won't be allowed near you. That did it, she's going to change.

Well, I rambled on long enough and it's about time for the nurses to come change you and bathe you for the night. Get well soon, Jack.

Daniel

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Something doesn't feel right. Everyone is rushing around and acting funny. He felt nervous. Janet had come in his room with a clipboard and gave it to Sam. She scribbled on it a few times and gave it back. Sam looked down at the floor then back up to him. She looked worried. The wet stuff came from his eyes. Sam rubbed his arm and smiled. Different men came to him and took his blanket off. He looked down at his braced feet and rail thin legs. Why were those things on his feet? The men were pulling at the sheet he was laying on and lifting it up with him still on it. He wanted to grab onto something to stop them but his arms wouldn't do what he told them. The wet stuff came from his eyes; he was afraid. He tried to tell them to stop, but all that came out was moans and screeches. They stopped and Sam came up to him again. She said that it was okay, they were just taking him to the new place she told him about. When he settled down, the men moved him onto another bed. They all left to go to the new place.

He was in the new place. It was nice. There was lots of pretty colors. Daniel made the bright light in his face again. Why does he do that? He looked around his new room. It was all too much. He fell asleep.

Strange people were touching him again. He wished that Sam wouldn't have left. She always made things better. By now he was used to what they were doing to him, the poking and prodding, but the fact that it was strange people made him nervous. He hoped that they would be done soon. Now they were trying to get him to do things, things that he could only dream of doing. Crap! Everything was turning sideways. No, it was just them turning him on his side. He felt her hands touching his back. What the hell was that all about? He wished that he knew and understood. On his back again. Something was wrong. Though he didn't know what or even what to do about it. More people came in did things to him and left.

The longer this went on, the more exhausted and frustrated he became. He'd fall asleep, they'd wake him up. More wet stuff flowed from his eyes. He screamed and begged them to stop. He couldn't understand what came out of his own mouth and obviously neither did they. God, why couldn't they just be done? Finally, she covered him up and mumbled something to him before walking out of the room. Now he could sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

It was the seventh and final day of Jack's neurological testing and tension was running high. Sam, Daniel, George, Cassie, Andy, and Teal'c waited anxiously in the family waiting room just down the hall from Jack's room while Janet and Dr. Ward along with some of the therapists conducted the testing. They were all stressed out, worrying about what the results would be, and even though Jack didn't know what was going on, the extra activity around him was overwhelming for him and he was highly agitated. Today was the day that they would find out what the rest of Jack's life would be like. Cassie chatted nervously about her plans for the upcoming school year while Sam paced the room. Sam's mind mulled over the past few weeks since Jack had woken up from his coma; how he had gone from just staring into space to non-purposeful movements and sounds; how he went from solid and strong to thin and weak, his body slowly wasting away from injury and inactivity. His usual brightness was gone from his eyes, replaced by confusion and fear.

Sam roamed to the far back corner of the room and covered her face with her hands, trying to keep from losing the tenuous hold on her emotions. All this waiting was killing her. It felt like she had an angry volcano inside of her, rumbling and shaking, growling its threat of eruption. She felt like screaming. Tears began to stream down her cheeks. Worry and fear clenched at her heart. What would the doctors find? Would Jack ever be the same again? Would she be able to handle it? How would this affect their son? These questions and more swirled out of control in her mind. She hadn't noticed that the room had gotten quiet or that Janet was standing in the doorway with a despondent expression on her face. Andy stood and walked over to Sam, gently tugging on the hem of her shirt.

"Mommy?" Andy said quietly.

"Huh?" Sam said as she snapped out of her reverie. She dried her eyes with the back of her hand and with a sniff looked down at her son.

"Aunt Janet's here."

"Thank you, sweety," Sam said, rubbing the top of her son's head. Sam tried to settle her trembling body as she led her son over to a chair. Her heart began to race when she sat down and hefted the little boy up onto her lap, holding him tightly to keep herself still. She was anxious to hear the final report, but at the same time, she just wanted to go to Jack's room with him and not hear it. Her breath hitched as she watched Janet take a seat across from her.

"I asked Dr. Ward to allow me to talk to you alone, not just as a doctor, but as a friend," Janet said then paused to steady herself, her eyes flicked toward Sam and Andy, the nervous expressions on their faces. God, this was going to be harder than she thought. It felt like it was three months ago when Jack was first brought back from the planet and she was the bearer of bad news. It was the same story only in a different setting. Now, she had to tell them that the Jack O' Neill that they knew was gone, and a new Jack O'Neill replaced the old.

"Janet?" Sam asked, her voice tight with fear and anxiety.

“Jack isn't the Jack that we knew. He's basically starting from scratch. When Jack woke up, he woke up to a whole new world. For him, it's almost as though he was just born. His memory has been deeply affected. He knows that he is Jack and he knows who Sam and Andy are, but beyond that, it appears he has no memory of anything before he woke up. He only responds to Jack. It's as if he hasn't quite grasped the concept that he has a last name, and it seems that his rank is totally irrelevant to him. Maybe in time, some may come back or maybe all. There's no way of telling at this time. The anoxia primarily affected the right side of his brain, which controls his left side. So, he's got what is called hemiparesis, which means he has weakness in the left side of his body. This may or may not improve over time." Janet paused to allow what she had just said to sink in and at the same time, to allow herself to fight back the emotional dam that threatened to break. She looked around the room at the shell shocked faces of her extended family.

"Is it permanent? The brain damage?" Daniel choked out.

Janet shook her head, she willed herself to look at them. "Yes, Daniel, it is. There's a chance that he can recover most functioning, but essentially he's starting life all over again. He'll have to relearn how to walk, talk, read, write, eat, and other activities of daily living. What functioning doesn't return, he can learn ways to compensate with therapy. Now we all can help by talking to him, telling him stories and showing him pictures. I'm going to hang this orientation poster at the end of his bed. ”

Janet held up a bright yellow piece of poster board. On it, written in large black letters:  
Your name is Jack O'Neill  
You are in the USAF Academy Hospital  
You had a brain injury  
You came here on June 15th  
Today is_____________________________________  
day of week /month date/ year

"Here at the bottom we have Velcro cards that have the day of the week, numbers for the dates, years, and the months. We are also going to write on his dry erase board each morning what therapies and such he will have that day. ”

Sam felt her heart clench tight in her chest, her lungs felt like they turned to lead and wouldn't allow her to breathe. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she wrapped her arms tightly around her son. This was so unfair to Jack. Her red, tear-filled eyes looked up to Janet's face and what she saw told her that there was more bad news to come. Sam closed her eyes and took deep, calming breaths. She gave Andy a squeeze for strength and opened her eyes. Cassie stood and walked over to Sam, wiping the tears from her own eyes and with a sniff, she wrapped her arm around Sam's shoulder. Sam took one hand away from Andy and put it on Cassie's arm. Teal'c and George also moved closer to Sam to offer their support. This was difficult for all of them, but together, they were going to get through it. Straightening her back, Sam gave a tight nod to continue. Janet gave her a small smile by way of comfort.

"Along with the brain injury, Jack has significant hearing loss in both ears. We're going to get him hearing aids that will help him."

"Can his hearing be corrected?" Hammond asked in a hopeful tone.

"I'm afraid not," Janet replied somberly.

"No longer to interfere in the affairs of others," Daniel whispered.

"What?" Hammond looked at Daniel with confusion.

"That's what Aceaus said when they sentenced Jack. That's why they did what they did to him. They wanted to make sure that he never interfered in others affairs," Daniel's voice was low and thick with sadness.

"Cassie, can you take Andy for me a few minutes?" Sam asked.

Cassie took Andy from Sam's lap. Sam stood and gave him a quick kiss on the head, then ran from the room, tears pouring from her eyes. Hammond got up and went after her, not as her CO but as her friend.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack was scared. He was in a strange place surrounded by strange people with no clue as to how he got there. A man and woman were doing things to him. He tried to pull away from them, but his body wouldn't move the way he told it to. The woman leaned over so that her face was in front of his. Her mouth was moving, but he only heard muffled sounds. He had a feeling that he knew her, that he'd seen her before, that she was good. They were doing too much. He tried to close his eyes to escape. When he did one of them would touch him till he opened them back up. He just wished that they would leave him alone. He was tired and scared, he just wanted to go back to sleep. How long had he been asleep? He tried to ask the strangers. Nothing. He could feel his mouth move, but no words, just grunts or groans. He could feel the panic building up inside of him, his heart racing and his breathing quicken.

Now there was wet stuff coming from his eyes, running down his face and blurring his vision. The woman wiped his eyes and nose with something soft. More wet stuff came. He watched them move his legs. Why were they doing that? Didn't they know it hurt? He tried to reach out when he felt them roll him onto his side, his body lashing out in its spastic way. He let out a strangled cry when his hand hit into the padded safety rail. A gentle hand rubbed his arm. It felt nice so he let himself settle down. He lay quiet while they did more things to him, looking over his surroundings. His back was cold. Now they were pointing to pictures and saying things. What were they saying? Why couldn't he hear them? After a while they finally left him alone. Left him to think. At least to try and think. Nothing wanted to work the way he wanted it to. He couldn't understand any of it. He was tired again. Why was he always so tired?

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Hammond found Sam on a wooden bench just outside the main entrance to the hospital, her face buried in her hands. He sat down beside her and wrapped his arm around her sobbing shoulders. She sat up and wiped her hand across her eyes in an attempt to dry them.

"Sorry, sir." Her voice quivered.

"You want to talk about it?" The fatherly tone to his voice was comforting.

"I screwed up, sir. I let my stupid damned pride get away from me and Jack paid for it," she confessed.

"You just stood up for what you thought was right," Hammond gave her a handkerchief from his pocket. "Besides, what happened would have happened even if you hadn't done anything."

"I know, but the point is that I did do something," Sam sniffed and wiped her eyes before she continued, "One last mission. All I had to do was keep him safe. I didn't do that. I cost Jack everything. Don't you get it? I ruined my husband's life!" That was all that she had left in her, her resolve was gone. With her head buried in her CO's shoulder, her emotions flowed with a vengeance.

"Let me ask you this. If this wasn't a set up, and if they had said that they were going to punish you, what do you think that Jack would have done?" Hammond asked her softly.

She let her features mellow, realization dawning on her face. "He would have taken it for me."

Hammond nodded. "Sam, you didn't ruin Jack's life, Kinsey did. You were a pawn in this whole scheme just the same as Jack was and we were. You had no way of knowing that it was a set up at the time. You did what you thought was right and so did Jack."

"It doesn't make it any easier," Sam said with another sniff.

"No, it doesn't," Hammond replied as he patted her back. He bowed his head and sighed. "I owe you an apology, Sam."

"For what, Sir?" Sam asked in surprise.

"For yelling at you in my office and suspending you the day that you came back from the mission. I'm going to have your pay returned to you and have the suspension expunged from your service record. I was upset about Jack and I took it out on you without knowing all of the facts. I'm sorry."

"You have no need to be sorry. Despite the circumstances, I disobeyed a direct order. You did what you were supposed to do as the Base's CO."

Hammond gave her a wry look. "Then I guess we both acted the opposite of the way we should have didn't we?"

"Yes, Sir," Sam said, then gave a small smile. As quick as it came, the smile disappeared. "I hope that bastard rots in hell for what he did to Jack," she said fiercely.

"From your mouth to God's ear," Hammond relied.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sam felt a knot form in her stomach as she walked down the hall to Janet's office. When a doctor wanted to talk in their office it usually meant bad news. Janet had asked one of the nurses to get Sam a message to meet her in her office, that there was something she needed to talk to her about in private. She tried to steady her nerves before she reached a shaky hand up to knock on Janet's door. After hearing a chipper "Come in," from the other side, she turned the knob and entered the room.

"Oh, hey, Sam. Have a seat," Janet greeted and motioned to a chair in front of her desk.

Sam glanced toward the door as she took her seat. "Maybe I should check on Jack. Let him know that I'll be back."

"He fell asleep before I left. His occupational therapist had just left and the session wore him out. He'll be fine for a while," Janet assured her.

"Okay," Sam replied, not really all that sure of her reply. "What did you want to see me about? Is something wrong with Jack?"

"No, Jack's fine. I just wanted to talk over some information on Jack's condition and what we can can do about it. Sam, I'm going to be throwing a lot of information at you. So feel free to stop me at anytime if you have any questions or if there is something that you don't understand. Okay?" Janet said in a comforting voice. After a nod from Sam, Janet continued. "With Jack's results from the neurological testing, Dr. Ward and I've come with a comprehensive treatment plan for Jack. Our biggest priority is to get him functioning as independently as possible. He'll be started on a strict schedule that will get him into a routine. With brain injury patients, that is the best way to get them used to a routine to prevent frustration and confusion. It helps them get a sense of normalcy to their lives. Here is a copy of what I've set up for him."

Sam took the paper from Janet and began to read it. It was a very precise plan from an eight A.M. wake-up to a ten P.M. bedtime. Physical, speech, occupational therapies were all allotted times. He was even enrolled in a school program. Beside each entry was the name of his therapist for that particular thing. Family therapies and classes were scheduled on Saturdays and Sundays.

"This is the schedule that will be posted on his memory board."

Sam listened intently when, suddenly, a strong sense of foreboding swept over her, Jack! "I have to get back to Jack," Sam said as she quickly stood up and rushed from the room with Janet in tow.

As they approached Jack's room, they could hear raspy screams. Sam quickened her pace. Bursting into his room, she saw him on the bed, hunched over, his face contorted in pain with his fists pressed tightly into his temples. A fine sheen of sweat covered his face while sobs wracked his frail body. "Aaahhhh!!" His voice was beginning to give out from screaming.

Sam sat on the edge of his bed and began to rub his arm to comfort him.

"He's having a migraine. I'll go get him his pain medication," Janet said then rushed from the room. She returned within minutes holding a syringe, quickly emptying the contents into Jack's I.V," There you go, Jack. Give it a few minutes to kick in and you'll feel better."

Five minutes later, he finally began to relax, his arms slowly dropping from his head. His tear filled eyes looked up at Sam, his body still shaking slightly from the sobs and pain. She hugged his head to her chest, smoothing his hair. This was the worst migraine that he had yet and it made Sam feel more guilty that she hadn't been there with him. Assured that Jack was alright and she was no longer needed, Janet left Sam to comfort her husband.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

That night, Sam sat at Jack's bedside, his eyes fixed on her face as she talked to him and rubbed his hand. She could see a faint look of confusion and recognition in his brown velvet eyes. It was like he knew her, but didn't. The nurses had just been in to give him his medications and turn him onto his back. He seemed upset after they had left, but now he was finally beginning to calm back down.

"Dinner will be here soon, Jack. I bet you're hungry. You had a big day with all those tests," she said then leaned over and kissed his forehead. Jack made a squealing noise and bucked his head in an attempt to nod, a line of drool dripped from the corner of his slack mouth. Sam got a hand towel from the bedside table to wipe it off just before it dripped to his chest.

Sam was happy for the time alone with him. Teal'c and Daniel had gone off to the SGC to aid in some translations that SG-11 had brought back and wouldn't return to the hospital until tomorrow. Cassie had taken Andy home. Dr. Ward had been in earlier to check on Jack since Janet was on duty at the SGC. 

Sam liked Dr. Ward, he had an excellent bedside manner and he was good to Jack. He would talk to Jack like there was nothing wrong with him and he had the politeness to use layman's terms instead of the complicated medical terminology.

Suddenly, a bad smell filled the air. Sam looked at Jack's face to see it scrunched in shame and tears welling in his eyes. He began to moan and his body jerked.

"Oh, honey. Its okay. Don't cry," Sam tried to comfort him as she hit the call button for the nurse. "I love you no matter what," She kissed his forehead again and lovingly caressed his cheek. Jack slowly began to settle down a few minutes later.

"Hey, Sam. Did Jack need something?" a young nurse asked as she entered Jack's room.

"Yeah, Tami. He soiled and he's upset about it," Sam told her then smiled down at Jack, rubbing his cheek soothingly.

"Hey, Jack. It's me Tami. I'll get ya cleaned up. Okay?" Tami said with a smile.

Tami had been one of Jack's regular nurses since he had been transferred to the Neurology ward and they had become friends since then. After summoning help, Tami set to work getting Jack cleaned up. They worked quickly and easily, talking to Jack in a kind and caring way to let him know step by step what they were doing. Within a few minutes, they had him cleaned up and into his wheelchair.

“Your dinner will be here soon," Tami said cheerfully.

Jack looked at her as if trying understand her, a loud shriek emitting from his mouth when he tried to respond to her. Sam stood by his side and lovingly patted his hand.

"I'll be back later to check on him," Tami told Sam, then turned her attention to Jack. "See ya in a bit, Jack."

After Tami left, Sam sat down by the bed and began to massage Jack's hands as she had been taught by the occupational therapist assigned to Jack.

"Do you want me to turn the television on, Jack?" she asked him in a loving voice.

He made a sucking noise with his lips and his body jerked in its usual uncoordinated way, so she reached up to flip on the small television that hung above his bed on a moveable metal arm. Finding the Simpsons on, she re-took her seat and resumed massaging his spastic right hand. With his attention on the cartoon, she took time to study his face. If not for the slight droop on the left side of his face and the horseshoe shaped scar with indentation beneath it on the right side of his head, he looked as though nothing had ever happened. She began to mentally berate herself again for thinking that way about him. Damn Kinsey, damned him to hell!

After a few minutes, she noticed that his eyes began to drift close as he fell asleep. Slowly sliding her hand from his, she reached up and flipped off the television. She decided to take advantage of the quiet time to read over the information about the traumatic brain injury rehabilitation program that Janet had given her. She carefully read over the various programs that they offered for the patients. There were a lot of programs for families as well such as support groups and classes on caring for them when they went home.

After she had finished reading the brochure, Sam took a deep breath and leaned back in the chair. She picked up “Jack's Journal"and began writing.

Jack's Journal: Tuesday, August 13, 2002 

Today was the last day of your testing. You do have significant brain damage and you are nearly deaf in both ears. You may never walk again, all because of some self-righteous son of a bitch! Damn Kinsey to hell and back again! I'm so sorry, Jack. Just please believe that I'll always love you no matter what. I'm just glad that you are alive and here with me. I just find it so unfair that a good man like you had to be hurt because you are a good man.

Janet also explained that you will have emotional lability ( which means you will have emotional episodes where you'll either cry or get mad easily) and dis-inhibition ( this means that you will do inappropriate things at inappropriate times without knowing or realizing it). She said it is because of the dis-inhibition that you have been pulling out your tubes and wires and exposing yourself. Over time, you may get more control over these, but like with everything else, there are no guarantees. Only hope and speculation.

Janet said that when we come into your room we are supposed to say, "Hey, Jack. It's me ( our name)," and lightly touch your arm to get your attention. She wrote it on a piece of poster board and hung it on the bulletin board that hangs on the wall opposite the foot of your bed. She explained that it will help you to remember who you are and who we are.

Janet said that you'll start full time therapy without having to be transported to another hospital. She set up a schedule of your therapy and put it on the memory board on your wall. We can spend the night with you whenever we want. We'll all be here to help you. You'll never be alone. Andy is already making plans on what he can do to help you.

We all love you (especially me!), General Jack O' Neill, and if you can ever only remember one thing,please remember that.

Love,  
Sam


	15. Chapter 15

Jack looked at Sam. He remembered her and his Andy. They were the only things he remembered. They were the bright glitter in the black velvet that was his memory. She wiped the wet stuff that came from his mouth. Why did he do that? He tried to ask her, but his mouth made only a garbled and squeaky noise. He could see her mouth move. More garbled noises. He wished that he could hear what she was saying to him. Oh no! There was that fluttery feeling in his stomach again. The squishy feeling under his butt. Then the horrible smell floated up to his nose. He felt bad. He didn't know why it happened or what to do to stop it. All he knew was that it happened every day and that he hated it. The wet stuff came from his eyes again. She looked away from him. Not good. Another face appeared. A woman's face. He felt like he was falling, then he was on his side. Good. She was making the smelly stuff go away. She was easy with him and he liked that. He was on his back again and floating up. His eyes followed her as she put the tube in the thing in his nose. He hated that. It felt funny. They were lifting him into the moving chair and putting straps on him. The other woman left and Sam kissed him. He liked how her lips felt on his head. Her mouth moved before she reached up and turned on the thing with the funny stuff on. Then she rubbed his hand. It felt good.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Saturday, August 3, 2002

Today is Cassie's 17th birthday. She was sad that you weren't able to have cake her with her, but she said that she'll save you some. It was at that point that Andy chirped in and said that he had eaten an extra piece of cake for you. She came to see you for a while after her party and brought you a balloon. We all could see a spark of joy in your eyes as she prattled on about her party and what she got for gifts. She said that the best present that she got was your waking up and being alive.

Cassie, Andy, and I went to the cafeteria for sandwiches while Janet did your examination. We talked about last year when she had that virus and how you and Janet made Nirrti help her and how you rescued Andy three years ago from the Goa'uld. We all cried because we can't return the favor to you. You see, Jack, despite the fact that you think that you are insignificant, you mean a lot to more people than you think. As far as the people who hate you, well, they only hate you because they can only dream of being a man like you.

Cassie has already started planning a welcome home party for you. Pizza and cake are definitely on the menu so don't worry. The guest list is: Me, Andy, Janet, Cassie, George, Daniel, Teal'c, Siler, and Walter. She may invite more, who knows. You know how teenagers are when it comes to parties and I might add that your influence on her didn't help much ;). She took lots of pictures of her party and put them in your book for you to see.

Health wise, you are recovering as well as can be expected. I have to admit that I'm getting a tad impatient and worried. Janet and Dr. Ward say that things are going well and that everything is normal for someone who has endured what you had to, but you know me. I gotta worry. I really wished that things worked in reality as they do on television and that you would wake up from the coma and start moving around and talking. Reality can suck at times.

Please just get better, Jack. I don't care how you are, so long as you are here with us. I love you, Jack O' Neill!

Love always,  
Sam

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

A nurse came in to get Jack ready for bed. Sam decided to go down to the waiting room to get a cup of coffee while the nurse was here with Jack. After Sam had disappeared down the hall, the nurse knelt down in front of Jack and without warning, slapped him hard against the left side of his face.

"So, you're the great and powerful Jack O'Neill. Well, from where I'm standing, you are nothing more than a retard that shits his pants and cries like a little baby. Let me introduce myself, dummy. My name is Daphne Reynolds. I believe that you were familiar with my fiance, Dane Kinsey. We were going to get married until you fucked it up for us. Daphne and Dane Kinsey, has a lovely ring to it doesn't it?" Daphne said then took her fingers and snapped the end of Jack's nose. "But, you had to go and ruin it! Why the hell did you have to write all of that stuff down? Why didn't you just die?"

Daphne held her hand up to hit Jack again when a noise in the hallway stopped her short. Jack cringed back in his chair, whimpering, tears streaming down his cheeks.

"I suggest that you keep this to yourself, retard, or next time you'll get far worse!" Daphne whispered in Jack's ear while she dug a knuckle into his collar bone.

Just as the words left Daphne's mouth, Sam walked into the room with a cup of coffee in her hand. "Hey, Jack, I'm back. Is everything okay?" Sam asked when she noticed a red welt on Jack's cheek.

"Yea, Sam. Everything's fine. Jack got a bit excited and accidentally hit himself in the face, but he's alright now. Aren't you, Jack?" Daphne said sweetly, placing a gentle hand on Jack's shoulder. She discreetly dug her nails into his shoulder when he flinched at her touch.

"You gotta be more careful, Jack," Sam said as she kissed him on the forehead.

"Let's get you into bed now, Jack," Daphne said in a soft voice.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sam and Janet walked quietly down the halls of the SGC towards General Hammond's office, talking quietly. Sam had just finished her report on the device that she was working on when the General had called her lab, asking her to meet him and Janet in his office. She let out a heavy sigh as she picked up the report and walked out of her office. She knew what the meeting was about and really wished that she had just stayed with Jack at the hospital. A pang of guilt struck her. She could come and go as she pleased and Jack was stuck in the hospital without the luxury of leaving for a break other than the occasional trips in his wheelchair to the patient courtyard.

Sam had met up with Janet as she passed the infirmary, Jack's medical file tucked under her folded arm. Sam cringed at its thickness, her mind reviewing the injuries that Jack had suffered since joining the SGC, not that Jack was reckless or accident prone, but because he willingly sacrificed his own well being to protect others. She tried to get Janet to tell her what Hammond wanted, but had no luck. Janet knew, but she was going to leave it up to Hammond to tell Sam. By the time she knocked on the General's door, Sam had a lump the size of an African elephant in her throat.

"Come in," Hammond said from the other side, his Texas accent made thicker by the sadness.

Sam and Janet entered his office, nodding an acknowledgment at the General as he motioned them to sit down. Sadness and exhaustion drew Hammond's face down, making the pockets of his skin sag. He drew a breath before he began to speak. "Major, I read over Dr. Fraiser’s report on General O' Neill. It's being recommended that he be put into medical retirement. This will be his best option for getting his full pension and military disability benefits rather than if I accept his personal retirement. It will also keep open the possibility of his coming back to the SGC on a civilian basis if he should be able to. Major O' Neill, we don't want to lose Jack either, but this is the best way to go." Hammond tried his best to sound confident, but his expression told another story.

"Yes, Sir," Sam's voice was low and she didn't lift her eyes from the floor. Sam thought about Jack. How was he going to take the news? Would he even understand it? Without another word, she signed the paperwork and after listening to fifteen minutes of ' It's not your fault', she made her way back to her lab.

Not even bothering to turn on the lights, she collapsed onto a stool and let her emotions loose. She folded her arms on her desk, then rested her head on them. I'll just a rest, she thought.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Before Sam had left to go home, she had given Daniel the go ahead to clean out Jack's locker at the SGC. Daniel sat on the bench in front of Jack's locker, staring at the name tag over it. J. O' Neill. This was hard, but he found himself thankful that at least he was doing it because Jack was retired and not because he was dead. Inside the locker hung the civilian clothes that Jack had worn to the Mountain that fateful Monday morning along with other personal belongings. With a heavy sigh, Daniel had opened the two bags that he had brought with him. He picked up Jack's shirt and towel, putting them in the larger bag to be taken for laundry. Next came Jack's pants. Daniel put a shaky hand in the front pocket and pulled out Jack's keys. As he went to put them in the smaller bag that would go to Sam, he saw two shiny gold circles hanging on the keyring with his truck and house keys. Curiosity got the better of him and he sat down to inspect them. They were Sam and Jack's wedding bands. He looked at the intricate design of the Gaelic rings and two hands holding a heart inscribed on the outside of the matching bands. Daniel knew that the Gaelic people held the belief that wedding bands were symbolic of the eternal promise of the vows made during a wedding ceremony.

"Gra Dilseacht Cairdeas," he read the inscription on the outside of the matching bands, whispering the words. "Love, loyalty, friendship."

He smiled, the rings were a perfect representation of Sam and Jack's relationship. The thought that Jack had put so much thought into them showed the love that he had for Sam. He eased the wedding bands from the keyring and slipped them into his pocket, wanting to hand them to Sam separately. He patted the rings in his pocket and set back to finishing the task at hand.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Jack's Journal: Tuesday, August 6, 2002 

Today, I found out that they put you into medical retirement. It took all I could not to scream while I signed the paperwork. I felt like I was betraying you. I couldn't help but wonder if you would understand, how you would feel about it. I know that you were going to retire anyway, but it still hurt for it to have happened this way. I wanted you to be retired your way. So, now you are officially USAF Brigadier General Jack O'Neill, retired.

I sat beside your hospital bed showing you the pictures that I had brought from the house. You looked intently at them, making noises every now and then. I wondered, hoped, if that meant that you recognized the people and places. As far as we know, you don't remember much more than who you are and Andy and me. You got used to Hammond, Daniel, Teal'c, Janet, and Cassie pretty quickly, though. Janet said that it's because they come to see you everyday, that when things are repeated, you begin to remember them.

You really perk up when Andy comes. He brings you games and toys. Janet said that Andy will be helpful with you to relearn things without too much frustration.  
Oh, my love, I really wish that I did know what was going on inside of your head. What are you thinking? What do you know? What don't you know? Do you know what happened to you? Do you remember the horrible things that they did to you? Do you even realize that you are different now?

I'm sorry that what I said sounded mean. I didn't mean for it to. I wish that there was a way that we could go back in time and fix things. I have been tempted to just go to our allies and get you help, but, as hard as it is, I made a promise to you, my love, and I am going to keep it. I love you no matter what and I always will. It's just that it seems so unfair to you. I decided that I'm going to take the anger that I feel for Kinsey and the rest of them that hurt you and use it to help you.

Jack, please know that I love you more than I could ever tell you. It was an honor to have served with you and it is a huge honor to be your wife. I'm proud to look at people and tell them that I'm Major Samantha O'Neill, wife of General Jack O' Neill and mother of Andrew O'Neill. I can't wait until the day that you can go home and we can be a family again.

Everyone sent you get well wishes.

You are sleeping now. It seems that a clean body and a clean bed are the key ingredients in sleeping Jack soup. You won't sleep without your dog or the blanket and pillow Cassie got you. When I take them home for washing, you are terribly cranky until I bring them back.

Sleep well, my love. Sweet dreams.  
Love always,  
Sam


	16. Chapter 16

The bright morning sun shone through the window, landing on Sam's golden locks as they rested on Jack's right shoulder. She straightened with a start, not realizing that she had fallen asleep. Her gaze fell upon the sleeping man, and she gently leaned over and placed a good morning kiss on his forehead. His eyelids fluttered open and she found herself lost in the deep brown orbs. "Good morning, Jack. I'm sorry that I woke you," she said to him, then smiled and slid her hand slowly down his cheek.  
Jack's lips curled in an attempt to smile and his right arm jerked up off the bed. The rest of his body gave a hard jerk, causing the bed to shake slightly. His faced crunched up in frustration and he grunted when his body did the complete opposite of what he wanted it to do. 

Her heart wretched when she saw the tears slowly begin to roll down his cheeks, his eyes masked in bewilderment. God, how she wished that she knew what he was thinking so that she could help him. "Jack, honey. It's me, Sam. What's wrong?" she asked, her tone drenched with emotion.

He just looked at her and blinked, more tears spilling from his eyes. His lips quivered as a low moan escaped. She leaned over and kissed him, running her fingers through his short hair in a desperate attempt to comfort him. It was then that she remembered the stuffed dog that Andy had bought him and the little light that appeared in his eyes when he'd see it. She went over to the bedside table and picked up the dog, nearly desperate to make him happy again.

"Here, Jack. Here's the dog that Andy bought you," she said, tucking the dog under his left arm. She tried hard not to talk down to him or treat him like he was nothing but an overgrown baby. She loved him way too much to do that. She smiled in relief when he began to settle. "I love you, Jack," she whispered to him before a voice behind her caused her to jump.

"Everything okay?" Janet asked, her face drawn in concern.

“Yeah. He just got a bit upset," Sam sniffed. "I gave him his dog and he settled down."

"How about you?" Janet put her hand on Sam's shoulder.

That small, comforting gesture was all it took for Sam to just let go of her emotions, yet again. She turned her back so that Jack wouldn't see her crying and start himself. Sam didn't remember crying as much as she had over the past few weeks since her mother died. It seemed to her that she cried at the drop of a hat. She cried when she would see the damage that had been done to Jack. She cried when Jack cried. She cried for crying.

"I think he hates me, Janet. I think he remembers what happened to him and that it was my fault," Sam sniffed and wiped the tears from her eyes.

"Sam, even if he did remember what happened, I don't think that he'd hate you. He loves you way too much." Janet gently patted Sam's shoulder. "You have to understand, too, that this is a whole new world to Jack. He's basically starting life over again. You've been doing exactly what you need to be doing, being there for him."

"It's just really hard to see him cry. I've never seen him do it before this happened," Sam said, more settled down but still sad.

"It's one of the many effects of a head injury as I've said. We just have to get used to the new Jack as well as he does," Janet said, her face downcast. She rubbed the back of her neck then continued, "Jack is no longer the Jack O' Neill that we knew. For the most part, his personality may return within time, but, it's all going to be different. He's going to have to re-learn to live life again and adapt to who he is now just like we will have to do."

"Will he ever know who he used to be?" Sam asked, her voice hitching.

Janet shrugged. "Maybe, maybe not. The thing with a brain injury is that when and if Jack's memories return, they will be in pieces that he'll have to put together. It'll be like getting a jigsaw puzzle then dumping the pieces and throwing the box away. You still can pick it up and put it together a piece at a time, but you don't have the picture on the box as a guide. He'll get a piece here and a piece there, not necessarily in the order that they need to be. He has to put the pieces together to get the whole picture. Some pictures may not be or ever will be complete. Only time will tell. He'll be fine, Sam, and so will you."

"Do you think that he remembers what happened to him?" Sam asked quietly.

"I honestly don't know, Sam. In most cases people don't remember what happened to them. Eventually, some figure out that they are different than they used to be, but the time between is lost to them. They get confused as to how they became the way they are. Most deny that they are any different. All we can do is wait and see what happens with him," she replied.

"What if he doesn't? Do we tell him?" Sam asked looking worried.

"If he doesn't figure it out on his own, then yes, we may have to tell him what happened," Janet replied sadly and then turned around to tend to Jack. A gasp escaped her mouth. "Jack!"

Jack had somehow managed to pull his blanket and hospital gown aside to expose himself for all to see. His eyes remained fixed on Sam and Janet while his right hand clawed at the catheter tube. Janet's hands flew down to move Jack's hand away from his catheter and cover him back up. Jack looked up at her with a confused look on his face as though he had no clue what all of the fuss was about.

"Jack, honey, why are you doing that again?" Sam asked him with an embarrassed smile.

"I take it that he's been doing that a lot?" Janet asked while still working on recovering Jack.

"Yes, actually he has. Yesterday, after you told us the results of his testing, Daniel was here with him and he did it. I came in just as Daniel was jumping out of his chair to cover him back up. Oh, Janet, I couldn't stop myself and I burst out laughing. Daniel was all nervous and when I asked him what happened. He was so worked up that he could barely speak. I know that the situation isn't something to laugh at, but if you had seen and heard Daniel..."

"I can just imagine," Janet replied between giggles.

Sam suddenly looked horrified. "I just hope that he never does it when Andy or Cassie are around."

Janet nodded in agreement and finished recovering Jack before she set to work with his check up.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sam got sad. All he wanted to do was smile and hug her to say sorry. Why couldn't he do anything right? Why couldn't he talk? The wet stuff came from his eyes again. It made her sad. He tried to stop it, but it came anyway. Her mouth was moving again. All he could hear was the soft muffled sound. He was mad that he couldn't hear her words, mad that everything either scared or confused him. Then she put the soft thing under his arm and made a happy face at him.

There were more hands on him, more muffled voices. He was getting used to the people in white touching him. They did it a few times every day. He didn't mind most of the time, especially when they made the bad smell go away and when they put the thing in him to make his stomach quiet. It did upset him sometimes when he was sleeping or when Andy was with him. He liked him. He didn't act weird with him like everyone else did, even Sam, and he brought him things. Why did people act differently with him? Was he different? Had he been different? It was good that people came. He didn't like to be alone. He liked that Sam was with him a lot. Sam, Andy. Cassie. Daniel. Teal'c. George. Janet. He remembered.

Sam and Janet were talking again. About what? Him? Sam looked sad. She was always sad around him. He wished that she would smile more. He liked her smile. He tried to tell her that, but he only made noises, no words just noises. He moved his arm. He grabbed the stuff on him and pulled at it. Janet looked at him. Her mouth and eyes were wide open, so were Sam's. What was going on? Janet was pulling at his blanket and her mouth was moving again. He really wished that one of them would tell him what was going on. He tried to ask, but the only sound he could make was a long drawn out 'mmmmm'.

Now Sam was saying something and smiling. It made him happy when she smiled. So, he smiled, at least he tried to. He wondered if it worked.

SG-1 SG-1 SG-1 SG-1

Sam sat at Jack's side talking to him about the show that was on TV when Tami came in to bath him for the night. "Hi, Jack. Are you ready for a bath?" Tami asked him cheerfully as she put the basin of supplies she brought on the over-the-bed table. "Hello, Sam."

"Hi, Tami," Sam greeted her. "Did you need to me to leave?"

"Actually, I was wondering if you'd like to help me bathe him?"

"Uh, yes, I would," Sam tried hard to sound confident, but her nervousness was very obvious, not about seeing Jack naked or the act of bathing him, but she was terrified of hurting him.

"Don't be scared, Sam. It's easy to do and trust me you aren't going to hurt him. Just be gentle and talk to him while you do it. You'll both be fine," Tami assured her, then she picked up the basin and went into the bathroom to get the water.

When Tami returned from getting Jack's bath water, she put it on the table and began removing Jack's gown. She laid a spare cloth over his groin and then tossed his gown into the soiled linen bin near the door. "We'll wipe him down and put a fresh diaper pad under him. After that I'll change his bandages and give him his meds," she said.

Tami stood at Jack's left while Sam was at his right. Sam gently mimicked Tami's motions until Jack's front was cleaned. Tami eased Jack to his left as Sam washed his back half and then they performed the same for Jack's right. Sam cringed at every move, hoping and praying that they weren't hurting him. He remained quiet during his bath, seeming to enjoy being cleaned. It was as though Sam being there and helping had a calming effect on him. When he was cleaned, Tami put a fresh diaper pad under him then prepared to put a fresh gown on him. 

Sam put her hand to her mouth and tears began.

"Are you okay, Sam?" Tami asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. It's just that I... I...," Sam stammered, her emotions prevented her from responding. She grabbed a tissue from Jack's bedside table to dry the tears that began to run down her cheeks.

"Sam, it's okay. I know that this is hard to see, especially with someone that you love, but, he's getting better and within time, the scars will fade," Tami said in a consoling voice.

When she finished putting a new gown on Jack, Tami covered him up with his blanket. After she was done with that, she gave Jack his medications. By then, Jack had fallen asleep and Sam had calmed down a bit more. Tami offered Sam a few more words of comfort before bidding her a good night. When she was gone, Sam sat down by Jack and held his hand. The smell of soap on him was calming and gave her a short mental escape by letting her imagine that they were at home instead of in the hospital. Her heart felt heavy in her chest. She leaned her head down on the safety rail of Jack's bed and the tears came like a waterfall. She wished that this was all a horrible nightmare and that she would wake up, that he'd be okay, in their bed and she'd be wrapped in Jack's arms.


	17. Chapter 17

Teal'c stood patiently by the wall at the foot of Jack's bed while Janet examined Jack. He considered it an honor to watch over his warrior brother. The physical therapist had given Teal'c some exercises that he could do with Jack's arms and legs when he didn't have therapy, a task which Teal'c did with pride and a gentleness that others would see as uncharacteristic of such a large man.

"Okay, Teal'c, I'm finished here. You can continue with his exercises," Janet said. She smiled as she turned her attention back to Jack. "Now you be good and do your Jane Fonda imitation until your lunch comes, and make sure you eat all of your food. We need to fatten you up, Jack."

"I will see to it that he finishes all that on his plate, Dr. Frasier," Teal'c promised as he cocked his eyebrow.

Janet chuckled. "I know you will, Teal'c. I'll be back later when Sam gets here."

Teal'c nodded to her as she left the room. He retook his spot at Jack's legs to resume the exercises. Gently sliding one large hand under Jack's right thigh and grasping the sole of his foot with the other, bending at the knee then straightening it back out. Five sets on each leg were completed when Jack's dinner tray arrived. Teal'c bowed his head to the young girl as she put the tray on the table. She smiled back and left the room. After replacing the braces on Jack's legs and hands, Teal'c put a towel under Jack's chin before he lifted the lid from the plate.

Jack wrinkled his face and jerked his head. "Blaahh!" he said.

"Do you not find your meal appealing, Jack?" Teal'c questioned while still maintaining his usual stoic expression. Teal'c lifted a spoonful of the soft food up and into his friend's mouth. Slurpy noises came from Jack's mouth as he ate, a tiny amount of food spilling out and dribbling down his chin. Teal'c put the spoon on the plate and picked up a damp washcloth to wipe Jack's mouth. Teal'c patiently fed his friend bite after bite, wipe after wipe, until the meal was finished.

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Daniel sat patiently by Jack's bed waiting for him to finish swallowing the last bit of Cream Of Wheat cereal that he'd just been given, reaching up and gently wiping the bit that dribbled down Jack's chin. Daniel slowly stirred the white mush before dipping a spoonful from it and lifting the spoon to Jack's mouth. He smiled as he watched Jack work the food around in his mouth, a small amount spilling from his lips, but Jack was eating. It was a feat that weeks ago they feared that Jack would not ever be able to do.

"Aaarrnnggh!" Jack cried out, trying in vain to bat Daniel's hand away.

"Do you want a drink, Jack?" Daniel asked him pointing to the sippy cup of water on the tray.

He watched Jack's face for a reaction, receiving the best smile that Jack could muster.

Daniel picked up the cup from the tray and held it up to Jack's mouth. "There ya go, Jack," Daniel held the cup tightly while Jack's head shook as he got a drink. When Jack had finished drinking, Daniel put the cup back on the table and grabbed a cloth to wipe Jack's mouth. As he continued to feed Jack, Daniel reflected on his friend. A slight smile touched his lips when he thought of how Jack's sheer stubbornness had brought the man from the brink of death. He knew that no amount of brain damage could ever change that about Jack, it was written into his DNA and there was no possible way of changing that. He had come a long way since he'd awakened from the coma, further than the doctors had estimated. Even though Jack still had a very long way to go, Daniel knew that Jack had the strength to recover as much as it was possible to.   
“Are you finished eating, Jack?" Daniel asked as he picked up the spoon from the near empty bowl.

"Aahhwes," Jack replied, moving his head in a shaky nod, droplets of spit flying from his mouth.

"They'll be bringing your hearing aids soon. Then you have physical therapy after lunch," Daniel told Jack while he pushed the table tray away from the bed. He picked up the small cloth from the bedside table and wiped the drool from Jack's mouth.

Daniel adjusted the padding on the safety rails of Jack's bed. They'd been put there so Jack didn't hurt himself on them during a seizure or his spastic movements. Luckily, the seizure meds have kept the seizures under control to where they were few and mild. He got the bad headaches and nausea episodes more often, but they too were controlled with medications.

Anger began to build inside of Daniel as he stood and looked down at the warped and way too thin body of his friend. The anger was in no way directed at Sam. Hell, he would've done the same thing, but, the anger, the rage was directed solely at the sacrilegious bastards that did this to his best friend.

Daniel picked up the book that he'd been reading and held it up so Jack could see it. "This is a book about Christmas. Can you say book, Jack?" Daniel asked, biting his lip with anticipation.

Jack narrowed his eyes and looked with deep thought at the book. His lips quivered, trying to form the word. "Bauunkkh."

Daniel smiled. Though Jack didn't say the word correctly, it was progress nonetheless and he was proud. "Good job, Jack. Would you like me to read some of it to you?"

Jack's head moved in a twitchy nod. "Eeahh."

Jack listened to Daniel until his eyes slowly drifted close in sleep. Daniel smiled as he thought of how, despite Jack being disabled, he was in a lot of ways the same old Jack, falling asleep on him when he talked about anything historical. When Dr. Kurtz, Jack's audiologist, brought his hearing aids, Daniel let out a low sigh of disappointment because Jack had just fallen asleep and she was going to disturb him, but at least now his friend would be able to hear what was going on around him better. Maybe now Jack would respond and interact more with his environment without so much frustration.

The young doctor laid a gentle hand on Jack's shoulder and in a comforting tone explained to Jack what she was going to do. Daniel was glad that she was gentle and patient with Jack when she put the hearing aids in his ears despite his futile attempts to bat her hand away. When they were in, she began to say his name. First in a low voice, then with no response she gradually said it louder. When her voice was a little above normal volume he finally turned his head toward her. Daniel could see the disappointed look on her face. Though the volume wasn't as loud as it had been, it was still high. She went around the other side of Jack's bed where she was out of his line of sight and behind him, she said his name again. She was nearly yelling his name before she got a response from Jack. His head jerked in her direction and he looked at her as though he was asking what she wanted. Daniel and Dr. Kurtz exchanged disappointed looks. It was expected that the hearing aids would only help him hear a little bit better and not completely eliminate the hearing loss, but the hope had still been there.

"You can go back to sleep now, Jack. I'm sorry that I disturbed you," Dr. Kurtz said.

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Sam pulled Jack's truck into their driveway. Turning off the ignition, she folded her arms on the steering wheel and rested her head on them. She'd been driving his truck around just to feel close to him and try to ease the ache in her heart. With a heavy sigh, she got out and walked to the back of the truck to start unloading the groceries that she'd picked up on her way to the house. She only had a half an hour to get them put away and get dinner started before Andy got home from school. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw their neighbor, Mrs. Forman, coming through the yard. She liked the older woman, but she wasn't in the mood for talking right now.

"Hello, Sam. Is Jack home?" Mrs. Forman asked in her usual sing-song voice.

"No, Mrs. Forman, Jack's not home," Sam replied, finding herself fighting back tears.

"Do you know when he will be? I haven't seen him in months and I got that quilt he asked me to make finished," Mrs. Forman said, running her fingers through her white hair nervously. "I know how he is away for months at a time because of the work you all do, but I don't ever remember him being gone this long." 

Marcia Forman had been Jack's neighbor since he'd bought the house and she seemed to to have taken over a motherly role with him from the start. Her husband had died ten years ago and none of her children or grandchildren lived nearby. She spent her retirement making quilts and doilies and helping others or, as Jack would put it, just flat-out mothering people. When Jack would come home injured, she would make him meals and bring them over to him. Since they had gotten married and adopted Andy, the older woman adopted them as well. A steady stream of casseroles and baked goods came to the house on a weekly basis.

"Uh, Mrs. Forman, Jack won't be home a few more weeks. He... uh... He was severely injured in a training accident back in May," Sam paused to get her emotions in check, her breath caught in her throat while tears burned in her eyes. It made her heart ache. She missed Jack and talking about him made it worse. Quickly she composed herself and continued, "he's been in the hospital since."

"Oh, my Lord! How is he? Is he going to be alright?" the elderly woman asked, obviously concerned.

"He's healing, but beyond that we don't know. He's in a wheelchair and he has some damage to his brain," Sam explained.

The woman looked horrified. “Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. Is there anything you or Andy need?" Mrs. Forman asked as she put her arm around Sam's shoulders.

"Just keep Jack in your prayers, please. He likes getting cards, too. He can't read them just yet, but he likes to look at them and have them read to him. I can write down the address of the hospital for you if you'd like," Sam offered.

"Yes, please. I'll send him a card and a care package if you give me a general list of what he can have now. How about I make you a nice casserole for dinner tonight? You look like you are about to collapse." She looked at Sam sympathetically.

"I'm fine, really, and thank you. I'd better get this stuff inside, Andy will be home from school soon. I'll talk to you later."

"Okay, Sam. Please let me know if you need anything at all. I'll bring the casserole over around seven," the elderly woman replied, giving Sam a gentle pat on the back. "Jack will be fine. One thing that I have noticed about him is that he is one stubborn Irishman."

Sam flashed the woman a smile. She felt a slight flutter in her stomach as she watched the old woman disappear into the bushes to her own yard. Even though Sam was surrounded by friends, the kind words of the older woman touched her heart and made her feel a little bit better.

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Jack's Journal: Tuesday, August 13, 2002

Janet is up in your room with you now, giving you your check-up. I wanted to wait with you, but she threatened me that if I didn't go get at least a sandwich, she would kick me out of the hospital for a week. So, here I am, trying to pick my way through a salad. She said that she was going to put boot braces on your legs today since your feet are healed enough for you to wear them. I guess they will help with the atrophy in your feet and legs. She is also going to put some different braces on your hands as well. They'll help your hands to straighten so you can do the therapy to strengthen them. We're worried that if your hands and feet stay the way they are, that you'll have to have more surgeries on them down the road to straighten them. Hopefully with the braces and therapy, that won't happen. I just wish that for once things would go easy for you. Well it's almost time for your lunch so I'd better head back to your room now. I love you.

Sam

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Sam entered Jack's room to find his lunch sitting on the table tray, and he was asleep. As usual, he was slumped to his left side. Janet said that this was an after effect of the brain damage and the hemiparesis. He looked so peaceful that she hated to wake him, so she took a few seconds just to look at him. The bruises were gone, though the scars remained, livid against his tanned skin. His rail thin body was warped out of shape from the injuries and lack of use. Despite it all, he was still very handsome. She ran her fingers lightly over the hearing aids and slowly up through his graying hair. Unable to help herself, she leaned over and kissed his lips. She straightened to see two velvet brown eyes staring up at her.

"Hey, sweetheart. You hungry?" Sam asked cheerfully, taking the lid off of the plate of food, which thankfully was still warm. The whitish mush looked horrid, but it did smell good. She was guessing that it was chicken by the smell.

"Eeeeaaaa... aam," Jack responded in a croaky slur and then gave her a crooked smile.

She smiled back at him and put a towel on his chest under his chin. Picking the spoon up off of the tray, she dredged some up and gave him a bite. "Cassie's going to bring Andy in to see you later. He wanted to come in tonight and feed you supper," Sam told him as she gave him another bite. She wished that she had waited until he didn't have food in his mouth because he got all excited and spit the food out all over the both of them. She grabbed a towel from the bedside table and wiped the splatters of mush off of the both of them.

She continued feeding him until he was done, wiping his mouth when any spilled out. He was getting better at eating without causing a mess, but he still had a way to go. Sometimes, she would wrap his tightly curled fingers around the spoon and help him feed himself. He seemed to like that. After he got the last bite down, she gave him a drink of his juice and wiped his face before placing the towel on the tray. She sat and talked with him until the nurses came to bathe and change him for the night. Times like this really broke her heart, watching as her husband was moved around like a limp rag, his body moving in an uncoordinated and spastic way, moaning and squealing, totally unable to do the most basic things for himself. When they'd move him, he would cry out and tears would pour from his eyes. Sam wondered if they were hurting him or if it was just how he reacted to being touched. Before they left, the nurses rolled Jack onto his left side and put a long cushion between his knees. He was content now that he was clean and had a fresh bed. Sam put the stuffed dog under his arm and kissed him goodnight before she went over to the couch to sleep. She laid there and watched Jack until her eyes slowly slid closed in slumber.

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The mushy stuff was good tonight, Andy did good with feeding him. It felt good to be with him. Sam's smile and gentleness made it even better. She seemed happier tonight. That was good. He got sad when Andy left, but Sam made it all better, again. She told him about having to go to a new place and learn things. Everything seemed new to him, yet familiar. He said her name in his head, but when it came out, it wasn't the same sound. No matter. Point was that it happened and that made him happy. His heart fluttered when she kissed him. He liked that. He tried so hard to move. Why wouldn't his body do as it was told?

Ah, clean body and clean bed. He was on his side again. He was sleepy again. Always sleepy. Sam gave him his soft thing again. What did she say it was called? Where did he get it? How long did he have it?

Another kiss. Another smile. She was leaving! Where was she going? The wet stuff was pouring from his eyes again. He watched as she laid down on the couch. Okay, she wasn't leaving. Good. He wondered if she would go to the new place with him. He hoped so. Would Cassie? Daniel? Teal'c? Janet? George? He saw them every day, so he remembered them. When they would come see him, they would bring presents and say "Hey, Jack!" and then their name. That helped him to remember who they were and, most importantly who he was. Very good.

He watched her eyes close. His eyelids were getting heavier. Sleep.

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Jack was both scared and fascinated by everything he saw on the way down the long corridor to the therapy room. He looked at everything and everyone over as they passed them in the hallway. Sam walked by Jack's side with her hand lovingly perched on his shoulder and smiled down at him. When they entered the therapy room, Tom pushed Jack's wheelchair over to the blue padded tables that lined the far wall and parked beside the last one. Sam took a step back so that she wouldn't be in the way when Tom transferred Jack to the table.

"Okay, Jack. You ready to get started?" Tom asked, readying himself to lift Jack onto the therapy table. The tall, blonde physical therapist was kind and more than patient with Jack. He had been assigned to Jack shortly after he had woken up from the coma and he worked well with him and always explained what was going on to Jack in a nice, dignified way. He never treated Jack badly and whenever possible, he would allow Sam to participate in Jack's therapy sessions.

"Nnnyyea," Jack replied.

Tom undid the safety harness and then lifted Jack up onto the table. After he removed all of Jack's braces, Tom slid a pillow under Jack's head and began doing the passive exercises on Jack's legs. Jack grunted and moaned throughout the exercises, his red face was covered in sweat and tears. Though his hips and legs were healing nicely from the surgeries, they were still tender. When he was done with Jack's legs, Tom did the exercises on his arms and Jack struggled to help. After the stretches were done, Tom helped Jack into a sitting position against the back of the table. "Okay, Jack. We're going to do the ball now," Tom said as he picked up a big red ball up off the floor near the table.

Jack smiled and laughed, though it didn't quite sound the way he wanted it to.

"Now, I'll roll it to you and you just push it right back. Just like we always did in your room only with a bigger ball," Tom instructed with a smile.

Tom rolled the ball to Jack, Jack pushed it back with a shaky right hand. Jack was getting more control over his right arm, but his left arm still curled up toward his arm pit. He was slowly getting a small amount of mobility in his left arm, but for the most part, he had no strength in it or control over it. By the fourth roll, his arm was getting tired and he missed the ball. Jack got frustrated and his eyes teared up, which upset him even more. "Dm!" Jack barked, shocking both Sam and Tom.

"Jack, did you just say 'damn'?" Sam asked with a half smile. She couldn't help herself, he was acting like the typical Jack O' Neill that he had been. She was very proud of the progress that he was making with his speech, even though some of it was curse words.

Jack nodded, still scowling over missing the ball.

"Don't get frustrated, Jack. It's going to take time before your strength comes back. Be patient with yourself and take your time," Tom comforted him then put his hand on Jack's and smiled. "Come on. Let's try again. Now I want you to try and use your left arm a little."


	18. Chapter 18

Sam just couldn't keep her mind on her work, it kept flicking back and forth between thinking about Jack and watching the clock. All she had to do yet was finish this one last report and she could go to him, but she just couldn't keep her mind on it long enough to finish it. There were times where she considered resigning and spending all of her time with Jack and Andy, and today was one of them. With a heavy sigh she went back to writing. Two hours to go! By eleven, she was so into writing the notes in her report that she didn't notice Janet enter her lab, carrying a blue binder. 

Janet couldn't help but smile. She was happy to see Sam doing something other than worry or blaming herself for what happened to Jack. Janet too couldn't wait until Jack could go home and her friends could be a family again. Granted, Jack would be different, but the love that they had for each other was strong enough to overcome that.

"Ahem." Janet stiffled a giggle when Sam jumped.

"Janet. Sorry, I didn't see you," Sam said then laid her pen on the desk.

"I didn't want to interrupt what you were doing," Janet hoped that she kept her voice even, but even to her ears, it didn't sound that way. Could she help being concerned for her friends?

"Everything okay, Janet?" Sam got a bad feeling; there was something about Janet's tone.

"Yes, Sam. Jack is fine. I brought you the information you asked me for," Janet said, handing Sam the binder. "There is stuff in here about Jack's disabilities and adaptive equipment that he'll need when he goes home. There is information on the care classes and support groups for families that is offered."

"Thanks, Janet. I really appreciate this," Sam's voice was quiet, her eyes wandered to the picture of Jack and Andy that she had on her work table.

"He's going to be fine, Sam. Jack has beaten the odds many times over the years and he's doing it now," Janet said in a comforting voice. "Besides, you got an eager little helper."

"Yes, I do," she replied looking up and smiling.

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Daniel sat by Jack's bed with his nose in a book while his friend slept. He had volunteered to sit with Jack while Sam went to do some lab work at the Mountain and shortly after breakfast, Jack had fallen asleep. Jack still slept a lot, but Janet said that would go away within time. With a wide yawn, Daniel closed his book and laid it on the bedside table. He looked over at Jack to see his friend's deep brown eyes staring at him.

"Hey, Jack. Why didn't you let me know you were awake?"

"Ahhhhppthh!" Jack screeched, causing a thick blob of drool to drip down his chin.

Daniel reached for the washcloth on the over-the-bed table to wipe Jack's chin when he realized that it wasn't there. He'd have to go the bathroom to get another. "Jack, I have to go into the bathroom to get another washcloth, but I'll be right back. Okay?"

"Eeeaappthh," Jack replied again, and again, another blob of drool ran down Jack's chin.

Daniel quickly made his way into the bathroom and picked up a fresh washcloth from the rack. He turned to go back over to Jack's bed when a high pitched scream froze him in his tracks. He flew out of the bathroom to find that Jack had somehow managed to fling himself halfway over the safety rail of his bed and was dangling by his waist. Daniel quickly snapped himself into reality and bolted over to the bed. He grabbed a tight hold on Jack and pushed the emergency call button to summon help. Within seconds, three nurses came flying into Jack's room and relieved Daniel of his screaming and struggling burden. It didn't take them long to get Jack back onto the bed and settled in. Jack moaned and jerked the whole time, making the nurses' job all the more difficult. Once he was settled, one of the nurses gave him a shot of pain meds.

"What happened, Daniel?" Tami asked.

"I don't know. He drooled and I went into the bathroom to get a fresh washcloth. I heard this awful scream. When I came out he was hanging over the rail," Daniel said somewhat shaken.

"I guess we'll have to keep a closer eye on him until Dr. Frasier comes back," Tami said as she checked Jack over, his face still red and scrunched in pain. "The pain medication will take care of the headache that he no doubt has from hanging like that."

"Yeah, that's good. Sam is so going to kill me."

"Relax, Daniel. It wasn't your fault. You had no way of knowing that he would or even could do that," Tami replied.

"But what if he had flung himself the whole way out of bed and really hurt himself?" Daniel asked looking anxious.

"Daniel, he didn't. He's okay. He just has a bit of headache from the pressure where the bone flap is missing in his head. Relax," Tami answered and put a comforting hand on Daniel's arm before she and the other two nurses left the room. 

Daniel sat back down in the chair by the bed and looked at his friend who had already fallen asleep. "Please don't scare me like that again, Jack," he whispered.

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The elevator dinged its arrival and the doors slid open with a light screech. George Hammond took a deep, steadying breath and stepped out. He had offered to take the lunch shift with Jack so he could have some time with Jack and do a little for the man who had done so much for him over the past few years. He was especially grateful for the time that Jack had put his life and Air Force career on the line ensure the safety of his granddaughters and get him his job back at the SGC. The memory of Jack smooshing his face into his kitchen window flitted into his mind as he stepped into Jack's room and looked at the warped form that occupied the bed. 

After the incident where Jack nearly flung himself out of the regular bed, Janet had arranged a few changes to Jack's room, including a new bed. This new bed was low to the floor and was encased in a netted cover similar to a baby's playpen that zipped closed on the side to prevent its occupant from falling out of bed. A blue mat was on the floor around the bed as a cushion in case of a fall.

Jack was lying propped up with pillows on his back, sleeping, the netting zipped closed. George took a moment to study the man who had, over the years, became like a son. His long rail-thin legs were propped up, the twisted arms laying alongside the lanky torso. Jack's head was tilted to the left and hanging down so that his chin was nearly touching his chest, a thin line of drool hanging from the corner of his partially opened mouth. George unzipped the netting and used a hand towel to wipe away the drool without waking Jack then sat down in the chair by the bed, keeping the netting unzipped since he'd be there watching him. He didn't want to disturb Jack's sleep until his lunch tray came. When he'd passed Daniel at the hospital entrance, Daniel had informed George that Jack had just finished therapy and was totally exhausted.

Twenty minutes had passed before Jack began to stir. His eyes slowly opened and looked around the room.

“Hello, Jack. It's me, George," he said cheerfully as he reached for a tissue to wipe Jack's chin.

Jack looked at George carefully, confusion soaked the deep brown orbs. After a few seconds, recognition and then joy flooded his expression. The biggest smile he could manage formed on his lips. "Eeeooorsh!" Jack exclaimed excitedly as his body shook with uncoordinated movements. Jack lifted a shaky hand toward him to hold. George smiled as he reached out and took Jack's hand. It was a common occurrence since Jack had awakened from the coma that, when he was happy or sad, he craved human contact, whether it be a gentle touch, a hug or, Jack's favorite, holding his hand, but, when he was frustrated or agitated, he made it plain and clear he wanted no one touching him. So, George sat there and held Jack's hand, talking with him until his lunch tray arrived ten minutes later. George rang for the orderlies to come and get Jack into his wheelchair to eat. Sadness clenched at George's heart as he watched the two men gently wrap Jack in his robe and lower his thin, shaking form into the wheelchair. He swallowed his emotions as the the last strip of Velcro was fastened on Jack's safety vest.

"Are you ready to eat now, Jack?" George asked and lifted the lid from Jack's plate.

"Eeeeaaaahh, Eeeooorrsh," Jack replied.

George stood from his chair, leaned over Jack and tucked the towel into the collar of Jack's hospital gown. He retook his seat and began to feed Jack, graciously alternating between giving him bites of his mashed food and helping him get a drink from his specialized sippy cup. He tried not to feel pity for Jack, but it came anyway and it brought anger right along with it, not by any means toward Jack. No. It was toward the self-righteous bastards that had done this to him. Many a night over the past few months since this happened, he dreamed of wrapping his hands around Kinsey's throat and throttling the life out of him. 

After Jack was finished eating, George wiped his mouth and moved the food tray aside. "Are you ready to go outside now, Jack?" George asked as he grabbed Jack's going out bag from the bedside table. It was a small shaving bag that contained a washcloth to wipe Jack's face if he drooled or cried, a small plastic sack in case he got sick, and a tube of lip balm. Scratch mittens for Jack's hands were also included since he'd developed a habit of clawing at himself to remove his diaper or anything on him that he didn't want there at the time. When he did this he'd give himself some nasty scratches. George hung the small bag on the left handle of the wheelchair and grasped the handles. Just as he turned the chair toward the door, Jack began to violently jerk and screech. George stopped dead in his tracks momentarily then hurried around the wheelchair. He knelt at Jack's side, ready to support his friend through a seizure when he realized that Jack wasn't having a seizure.

"What's wrong, Jack?" George asked him in a concerned voice.

"Hhhhaaaa!" Jack screeched hoarsely, trying to touch his contorted right hand to his head.

Realization hit George. Jack wanted his hockey helmet on. Teal'c had bought Jack a Colorado Avalanche hockey helmet a few weeks ago when Janet said that Jack would need protection on his head in order to go outside. So, George stood and made his way over to the over bed table where the helmet sat. He picked it up and went back over to Jack. Nervously, he lowered the helmet onto Jack's head and latched the strap under his chin. Once again, he stepped behind the wheelchair and prepared to take Jack out to the courtyard, and again Jack started screeching and bucking his head on the back of the wheelchair. George walked around the wheelchair and knelt in front of Jack again. He looked Jack over for any signs of sickness or pain and then he made sure that Jack's hearing aids were in and turned on. With the list checked off, George asked Jack again what was wrong.

"Ooofffttt!" Jack replied, patting his right left.

George was puzzled as to what exactly it was that Jack wanted and the longer that he tried to figure out what Jack wanted, the more Jack got agitated. By now, Jack was crying and a high pitched howl poured from his mouth. Finally, after five minutes of trying to figure it out, he understood. He walked over to Jack's bed and got the stuffed dog that Andy had brought him. He smiled at Jack when he put the stuffed dog in his lap and gave him a consoling pat on the arm. For what he hoped was the last time, George grabbed the handles of the wheelchair. He took a moment to make sure that they had everything before he started for the door. By now George was frustrated, not by any means at Jack, but at himself. If he had spent more time with Jack, none of that would have happened. As they headed down the hall, George made himself a mental note to ask Sam for a detailed list of what Jack took with him when he went for his walks and that he definitely needed to spend more time with Jack.

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Sam sat on the edge of their bed and looked around their bedroom, it felt so empty there without him. Cassie had offered to sit with Jack at the hospital so Sam could finish things up at the house and spend some time with Andy. With a sigh, she picked up her pad and pencil and made her way to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, stopping on the way to peek in on her napping son. She was working on a list of what needed to be done to the house and taking measurements for when Jack could come home. It would be a few more weeks until that time came, but it would take that long to get the renovations completed. After pouring herself a mug of coffee, she went out to the deck. A lump formed in her throat when the reality of the situation hit her. It would be a different Jack that she would be bringing home, a Jack that couldn't walk, could barely hear, that couldn't remember; a Jack that in all essence was beginning life anew, nearly devoid of his past, and it was all because of her! Yeah, sure, she didn't intend for it to happen, as everyone had been saying, but, it had happened. She'd been so predictable that she'd played right into their plan.

She couldn't help but wonder if he would ever remember how he had gotten the way he was and if he'd hate her for it. Deep down in her heart, she knew that no matter what, she'd love him and stand by him for the rest of their lives.

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Jack sat in his wheelchair at his table, staring at the picture of Sam and Andy that was sitting on his desk with a sad look on his face. Sam had gone home to spend the night with Andy like she'd been doing off and on since he started getting better. Jack looked up to see Daphne stroll coldly into his room and approach his wheelchair with an evil sneer pasted on her lips.

"Well, well. If it ain't Dumbass Jack. Sorry that I haven't been in to see you all week, but I needed a week off from wiping your stupid ass," Daphne said as she roughly undid his safety vest. She picked Jack up out of his wheelchair and flopped him down hard onto his bed, totally unaffected by his whimper of pain. “Shut up, you stupid retard!"

Tears began to roll down Jack's gaunt cheeks and he whined in pain while Daphne dug her fingers into his ribs to lift him up. Uncaring as to how rough she was, she ripped his t-shirt off of him. She pushed him back down onto the mattress and grabbed his legs, swinging them around to drop them hard on the bed. Jack shook with sobs as Daphne pulled his pants off. A painful screech rent from Jack when Daphne grabbed both of his legs and bent them at the knees before pushing them apart.

Not knowing what to do, Jack remained quiet and brought up a shaky hand to swipe the tears itching at his cheek. He didn't understand why she was being so cruel let alone what to do about it, but at that moment, he began to wonder. Was he different and why? He had a fleeting feeling that he shouldn't be the way he was, that he shouldn't be wearing diapers or crying so damned much. Jack was beginning to realize this, but what to do about it was beyond him.

Jack sobbed quietly while Daphne helped him bath and got him dressed for bed. He didn't even respond when Daphne gave him one last jab before zipping the netting around his bed and leaving the room. Feeling sore and broken, Jack sobbed himself to sleep.

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Daniel dried his eyes before he picked up the manila folder from the table in his lab and headed for Janet's office. He arrived a few minutes later to find her hunched over her desk, doing paperwork. He imagined it to be for Jack since she would be going to check on him soon. Daniel tapped on the door jamb with his knuckles before he spoke. "Uh, Janet. Can we talk for a minute?"

Janet looked up at him, laying her pen on her desk. "Yeah sure, Daniel. Have a seat."

Daniel pushed his glasses up his nose with his finger as he made his way over to a chair and sat down. He pulled out the folder's contents and handed them to Janet. "I was approached by a few of the staff here. They all signed up to help with the renovations to Jack and Sam's house. Plus they're all pitching in money to get Jack a good wheelchair and anything else that he may want or need. They wanted me to talk to you about what all was needed to be done."

"That'll be great! Sam sure could use the help," Janet read over the list of names and tears formed in her eyes. "I'm going to go to the hospital to do Jack's exam. I won't say anything to them, but I'll get the measurements of the house from Sam."

"Good, because I thought that we could do it as a surprise. How are you going to get that from her without telling?" he asked.

"I'll think of something," Janet replied with a wry smile.

"I'm sure you will," Daniel replied.

"Listen, why don't we meet for dinner tonight and we can go over the list?"

"O' Malley's at eight?"

"Sure. I'll see you then."

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By the time Janet had finished Jack's exam, he'd fallen asleep. She laid a gentle hand on Jack's shoulder and then motioned Sam to the door. They stopped just outside of Jack's room, leaving the door open so they could keep an eye on him.

"Sam, I was wondering if you had that list of what needed to be done to your house and the measurements?"

"Yeah, its in my bag. Why do you ask?" Sam asked more out of confusion than curiosity.

"I... uh... think I found a company that may have the furnishings at a low rate. I thought that maybe I could look into them for you and maybe poke around to find a contractor that specializes in remodeling for a disabled person's needs," Janet said and let out a breath silently taking pride in her quick thinking, yet hoping that Sam had really fallen for it.

"I'd appreciate that. I haven't had much time to take care of that and it needs to be done soon," Sam replied, running her fingers through her short blonde hair. "I know that his insurance will pay for the equipment, but I don't know if they pay for the work to be done or not."

"I can look into that. Why don't you get the list while I drop this off at the nurses station?" Janet turned and began to walk toward the station. 

Sam went back into Jack's room to get the list out of her bag, giving a quick look at Jack to be sure he was okay. By the time she had fished the list out, Janet had returned.

"Thanks, Sam. Don't worry we'll get it taken care of before he goes home," she reassured.

"Do you know when that'll be?" Sam said tightly, trying her damnedest to stay calm though she wanted to scream with excitement that Jack was finally going home.

"October second," Janet said with a smile, but the smile quickly disappeared when Sam's expression went downcast.

"Janet, that's a month away! I'm not going to have enough time to get everything done!" Sam sounded as though she was about to panic.

Janet put a hand on her shoulder. "Calm down, Sam. It'll be fine. Don't worry," Janet comforted her. She knew that Sam desperately wanted Jack home, but she also wanted to have everything ready for when that time came.

Sam glanced in at Jack's sleeping form, sadness tugged at her heart. Quickly, she reminded herself that Jack was going home and that he'd be home for his birthday, she straightened her back and wiped the stray tear from her cheek. "Thanks, Janet. For everything," Sam sniffed then began to speak again, "Do you have time to visit?"

A slight blush appeared on Janet's cheeks. "Uh. No. I... uh. I have to get home and get ready. I'm meeting someone for dinner tonight."

Sam tilted her head to the side in curiosity as she looked at Janet, a wry smile formed on her lips. "You have a date?"

"No!" Janet said backpedaling. "Daniel and I are just going to have dinner to discuss something." 

Sam's smile broadened. "Daniel? Uh huh. I bet I can guess what that business is," she teased.

Janet's cheeks turned a deeper shade of red. "It's nothing like that, Sam, and you know that."

"Do I? Come on, Janet. The thing with you and Daniel is just as obvious as it was with me and Jack, and like with us, you and Daniel are horrible at hiding it," Sam replied with a little giggle.

"Alright. Fine. I'll admit it. I like Daniel, but I really don't think that he feels the same about me. Anyway that has nothing to do with why we're meeting tonight," Janet responded before clearing her throat. 

Sam smiled again. "Oh really? Then why are you meeting?"

"I really have to go. Tell Jack I'll see him tomorrow," Janet said before she hurried off.

Sam let out a quiet laugh before going to back into Jack's room and sat down in the chair by his bed. Content just to watch him sleep, Sam curled up in the chair to relax. Within minutes she was asleep, the corners of her mouth turned up into a little smile. Jack was finally going home!


	19. Chapter 19

Janet tried to lose herself in the noise and smells of O'Malley's, closing her eyes and taking a few calming breaths. Sam was right about her liking Daniel, the thought of it caused her to blush like a schoolgirl. As quick as that feeling swept over her it was gone, and she mentally berated herself for acting in such way under the circumstances. She was here to help an injured friend, not for a date. After one last calming breath, she opened her eyes and scanned the crowded dining area for Daniel. Spotting him sitting against the far wall, she made her way over to him.

"Hey, Janet," Daniel greeted her as he stood and pulled a chair out for her, thinking how beautiful she looked. "You look great."

Janet felt her cheeks turn red. "Thank you. Uh, you look good yourself."

Daniel nervously cleared his throat and took his seat opposite of Janet. He couldn't take his eyes off of her. The waiter came up to them to take their orders. After they'd both ordered steak dinners, the waiter strolled toward the kitchen.

"So, uh, did you get the information from Sam?" Daniel asked nervously.

"Yes, I did," Janet replied, leaning over and getting the wrinkled sheet of paper from her purse.

"Great. Thanks," Daniel said as he looked over the list. "I told everyone that we would get together for a meeting Saturday night at my apartment. We can figure out then who will do what and when."

"That's a good idea. When I talked to Sam today, she got all upset because she didn't think that she'd have enough time to get everything done before Jack goes home," Janet replied before taking a sip of water.

"What did you tell her?" Daniel asked wide-eyed.

A little smile formed on Janet's lips. "I just told her that I would look into things for her."

Daniel breathed a sigh of relief. He knew that Janet wouldn't tell Sam what was going on, but he did worry that Sam would suspect something. "We'll have to come up with a story to tell her and a way to keep her away from the house for a while," Daniel told her with a thoughtful expression.

"Oh, yes, and it'll have to be a good one too. For now, I'll just have to avoid the subject with her until after Saturday night," Janet agreed.

A few minutes later, their food arrived at the table. They chatted, the conversation took a personal turn and by the time they were at Janet's car, a few long suppressed feelings surfaced. Daniel opened her car door for her and just before she went to get in, he leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. "I, uh. I'm sorry," Daniel stammered as he took a step back.

It took Janet a moment to recover her senses, she had wanted that to happen for so long and when it finally did, it had surprised her. She flashed him a sweet smile, then stretched up on her tiptoes and returned the kiss. This time, it was longer with a lot more passion. "Good night, Daniel. I'll see you tomorrow," Janet said quickly and jumped into her car.

"Uh, yeah. Good night, Janet," Daniel replied as if in a daze.

Janet started her car and began to pull out of the parking lot, her eyes glancing in the review mirror at Daniel. Oh, God that felt so right. Yet, she felt guilty. It seemed the most inappropriate time to fall in love.

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Sam nervously made her way from her lab to General Hammond's office. Her mind was racing a mile a minute, wondering and worrying. She just hoped to God that he wasn't going to send her off world now. With a shaky hand on the doorknob of Hammond's office, she took a deep breath and opened the door. She stepped in to find Daniel and Hammond waiting for her.

"Have a seat, Major," Hammond said as he waved a hand toward a chair in front of his desk.

Sam took the offered seat and began to tap her foot on the carpeted floor.

"Relax, Major," Hammond said, noticing Sam' twitchy foot. "Dr. Jackson has something to talk to you about."

Daniel smiled at the sigh of relief that came from Sam. He could just imagine what she was thinking. Wiping the smile from his lips, he cleared his throat and picked a folder up from the desk. "Sam, a couple of weeks ago some people here at the SGC approached me about doing something to help you and Jack. They all signed up to do the remodeling that needs to be done for when Jack goes home. So, I went to Janet to find out what needed to be done and to get any measurements that were needed. Saturday night, we had a meeting at Janet's house to make up a schedule and assign the duties," Daniel paused, noticing the tears that were forming in Sam's eyes. "We are going to put in ramps for wheelchair access, redo the kitchen and the bathroom to make them accessible, too."

Sam was overwhelmed, the caring generosity of the gesture touched her. "Daniel, I don't know what to say."

"Uh, there's more. General?" Daniel said nodding to General Hammond.

"We all took up a collection to get Jack a good wheelchair and other things as well, the President included. Most of us know people that own businesses that will donate the supplies that will be needed," General Hammond added with a smile. "We know that Jack's insurance would pay for most of it, but this our small way of thanking Jack for everything he has done for all of us over the years. We owe him a great debt and this will be just a small down payment on that."

"I really don't know how to thank you all for this. It really means a lot," Sam said as the tears streamed down her cheeks.

"No thanks are needed," General Hammond said, emotion heavy in his voice.

"He's right, Sam. It is the least that we can do. Besides if it was one of us, you and Jack would have done the same," Daniel added.

Sam stood and wrapped her arms around Daniel and then General Hammond.

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Sam woke from her slumber on the couch in Jack's room. Rubbing her eyes, she looked to find that Jack was still asleep. The nurses must have already been in because the dry erase board on the wall had been changed to show that it was Monday, September 9, 2002. 

Sam jumped from the couch. With all that had been going on, she'd completely lost track of time; it was their third wedding anniversary! It saddened her that he was spending it in the hospital and in the condition that he was in, but it made her determined to make it a happy anniversary for him. Plans for an impromptu party formed in her head. It would have to be small so as not to upset him, yet very cheerful. Teal'c and Daniel were due to arrive at lunch so she could get them to get her a few things. Janet would be in soon to do his check-up so she could use that time to go out to get him a gift and pick up a few other things. There was more to celebrate today than just their anniversary, they would be celebrating his survival.

Sam went over to Jack's bedside and sat down, content to just watch him sleep. A smile spread across her lips when his eyes fluttered, then slowly opened. Reaching down she gently turned his hearing aids on. "Good morning, sweetheart, and happy anniversary!" Sam said cheerfully.

Jack gave her a questioning look, his lips turning upward in an attempt at a smile.

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At around noon when Janet came to do Jack's exam, Sam motioned her into the hallway to talk over the plans for the party.

"I think it would be a good idea, Sam. It'll cheer him up," Janet said smiling.

"Can you feed him his lunch? I want to run to the store to get him a gift and a few things for the party. I'll call Daniel and see if he can tell General Hammond to come over. I'm going to call the school and leave a message for Cassie to bring Andy over after school, "Sam asked, taking a quick glance into the room at Jack.

“Yeah, sure. The therapist will be here around one so that'll give you little more time," Janet said as she put her hand gently on Sam's arm. "Don't worry, he'll be fine and he won't be left alone."

"I know that, Janet. I can't help worrying, though," Sam replied with a wink. "I'll be back soon."

After giving Jack a goodbye hug and kiss, Sam left the hospital. On the way to Janet's house she called to see how Daniel and Teal'c were doing with their things for the party and to tell them she would meet them at the cafe downtown in an hour for lunch. By the time she finished the call, she was pulling into the driveway and parked her car.

By two that afternoon, Sam was in the hospital parking lot unloading balloons and bags from her car. It was such a pretty day and she decided to take Jack out to the courtyard in his wheelchair later so he could enjoy it. When she got to Jack's room, the therapist was leaving. She updated Sam on Jack's session before disappearing down the hall. 

Jack was on his left side fast asleep. He tired easily and the therapy seemed to be difficult for him. It was apparent from the way he pushed and struggled during his sessions that at least some of his personality remained. She wanted to give him a kiss, but she didn't want to disturb him. So, Sam set to work attaching the balloons and decorations around Jack's room.

Everything was in place by the time everyone else arrived at four-thirty. The gifts were stacked on the table tray and the cake sat on the dining table. Janet took the ice cream that Daniel had brought to put it in the freezer at the nurse's station until Jack woke up. After hanging the 'Happy Anniversary' banner and streamers that Cassie had brought, Sam, Andy, Daniel, Cassie, and Hammond sat down on the couch to chat while Teal'c stood watch at the foot of Jack's bed. Janet had joined them when she returned from stowing the ice cream.

"O' Neill has awakened," Teal'c announced an hour later.

Sam approached Jack's bed to find his eyes roaming the room, taking in the sight of the balloons and decorations in the room. His face reflected a happy, yet confused expression. Sam discretely peeked at his hearing aids to be sure they were turned on so he could hear people talk to him. "Hey, sleepy head! You ready for our anniversary party?" Sam asked him, caressing the side of his face.

Jack's mouth moved as if he was trying to say something, but all he managed was a poof of air and spit droplets. He groaned in frustration as his head thrashed on the pillow and his body lashed out in its uncoordinated fashion, tears began to stream from his eyes. 

Sam had watched him during his speech therapy sessions and saw how frustrated he became when he struggled to say a word. She was proud of the progress he was making with his speech. "Hey, hon. Its okay. Just take your time," Sam comforted him.

"Eaas, Sssthhaammm," Jack said.

Andy saw that his dad was upset and decided that he wanted to try and cheer him up, so, he climbed up on the bed and gently gave his father a hug. "Hi, Daddy. Happy anniversary."

Jack made an uncoordinated movement to hug him back, only succeeding in getting his arm at an odd angle behind the boy's back. Tears welled in Jack's eyes and he began to moan in frustration, so Andy leaned into his father's arm and pulled at his hand until it was around his own arms.

“Hi, Uncle Jack. We brought you presents. Want to open them?" Cassie chimed in, trying to help Andy to lighten the mood.

Jack's lips attempted to turn into a smile. "Aaahhh. Haaasseee. Aaannee."

Cassie pulled the table tray over Jack's legs then reached up and picked a gift from the table, sitting it on Jack's lap, while Andy gently grabbed his dad's hands to help him open the brightly wrapped box. Janet took a picture and everyone in the room smiled, Andy helped Jack open the rest of his presents while Janet went to get the ice cream from the freezer. Sam and Hammond got the plates and spoons from the bag to set out for serving.

"Mom, can I feed Daddy his cake and ice cream?" Andy asked Sam when Janet returned.

"If it's okay with Dad," Sam replied with a smile. She knew that Jack would allow it because she had noticed how well Jack responded to Andy.

"So, can I, Dad?" Andy asked turning to face Jack.

"Eeassth, Aaanyy," Jack said as he bobbed his head, his lips quivering in an attempted smile and his body jerking in excitement.

Sam handed Andy Jack's towel for under his chin and his dish of ice cream. When everyone had been served, they took seats on the couch and chairs to chat as they ate. Every now and then, one of them would glance up at Jack and Andy. Sam couldn't help but notice the pang of sadness that pulled at her heart. Jack was limited to the point of having to be fed and wear diapers with no complaint as he would have normally done; he was without complaint because he didn't know, didn't realize that he had been another way before this. She imagined him grumbling, yelling that he could do it himself, hollering and pestering everyone to go home. Mentally berating herself for thinking down on Jack, she forced herself to enjoy the party, the celebration that her husband was alive and right there with her and their son.

When Hammond had finished his ice cream, he stood and put his plate and spoon in the trash. He grabbed a gift bag that had been hand decorated by his granddaughters from the windowsill and walked over to Jack's bed. "Tessa and Kayla made me promise that I would hand deliver this to you," Hammond said as he put the bag on Jack's lap with a smile and turned to give Sam a matching bag. “Happy anniverary, son."

Jack jerked his head toward Andy, and with a nod, he reached in the bag and pulled out its contents. It was a white t-shirt that read 'World's Greatest Uncle' in bright red letters and on the back written in rainbow puffy fabric paint 'We love you Uncle Jack! Tessa and Kayla'. Tears flowed from Jack's eyes as Andy read it to him; all present were touched by the scene.

"I told you they loved you, Dad," Andy told his father.

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Jack's Journal: Monday, September 9, 2002

Happy anniversary, Jack! We've been married three years today. We had a little party in your room, Andy, George, Cassie, Janet, Teal'c, me, and Daniel were here. You liked the cake and the ice cream. You got a lot of presents from us and just about everyone at the SGC sent us a card or a present too. I told everyone to just get you a gift since I already got mine: YOU! Here is a list of what you got and who gave it to you.

I got you a portable DVD player and a new pair of high top tennis shoes.  
Andy got you some cartoon movies to go with the player.  
Daniel got you some primer reading books with lots of pictures in them and all kinds of flashcards.  
Teal'c got you a portable hockey game.  
Janet got you a toy aquarium that lights up and makes sounds like a real one. It looks like a real tank with real fish.  
George got you a light that projects the night sky on the ceiling.  
Cassie got you a blanket with dogs on it and a matching pillow. You have these on your bed now.  
Tessa and Kayla made you a "World's Greatest Uncle"t-shirt. They made me one just like it but it's pink and has “World's Greatest Aunt"on it.  
Siler sent you the Simpson's movie  
Walter got you a new pair of gray sweatpants and a gray sweatshirt with the Colorado Avalanche logo on them.  
A lot people at the SGC sent us cards with money in them.

It was a wonderful day. You were very happy. Not long after Andy fed you your cake and ice cream, you fell asleep again. After your nap, we took you out to the patient courtyard in your wheelchair and you absolutely loved it! You babbled and squealed the whole time. We were worried at times when you whipped your head around to look at things. Andy told you what everything was and you tried hard to repeat what he said. I think your favorite part was when we were sitting on the bench and a bird landed in the tree beside us right above your head and started singing. It was wonderful to see you so happy.

We were just so glad that you were here to celebrate our anniversary. It was hard for us to shop for your gifts. Stupid really. We wanted to get you things that you would like and that you could use now, but we were afraid of offending you or hurting your feelings. We didn't want to get you anything that would make you feel like a baby or something. Janet and George both knew that what they got you was for stimulation. George said that his gift was also to make you feel like you were home and on your roof watching the stars until you can go home and actually do it.

When you get discharged from the hospital, I think that we're going to have to rent a U-Haul to take all of your stuff home! I have lost count of all the cards, flowers, balloons, and presents that you have gotten since you were admitted, plus, all that you got today. Andy and I are going to make you something out of the cards. At first we thought about making you a scrap book of them, but now there are way too many for that idea, so its back to the drawing board.

You are a very special person, Jack. I just wish that you would believe that. You never have.

Sleep well, my Jack. I love you.

Love,  
Sam


	20. Chapter 20

Daniel entered Jack's room to find Sam curled up on the bed beside him. The blankets were piled up below the pillows that were propping up Jack's feet. They were looking at the picture album that Sam had put together to help Jack with his memory. Jack stared down at the photos as Sam told him about each, his face crunched up in concentration. Just as Daniel was about got their attention, Jack's head jerked up and turned toward Daniel.

"'eyyyy, Daaannn'l. Hhh-ow you?" Jack said then tried his best to smile.

"Hi, Jack. I'm good. How are you?" Daniel said cheerfully as he made his way up to Jack's bed.

"W-w-e looooin' at pishhh-ures," Jack replied.

Daniel couldn't help but cringe. To hear Jack struggle to find words and say them was heartbreaking. Nevertheless, he gave Jack a smile and said, "That sounds like fun. Hey, Sam."

"Hey, Daniel. We were looking at Jack's memory book until Julie comes to do his therapy," Sam said, brushing a fuzz from Jack's leg.

"I, uh, brought you something." Daniel reached into his pocket and pulled out the wedding bands. "I found them on Jack's keyring the day that I cleaned out his locker and I thought that you might want them."

Tears began to form in Sam's eyes as she took the rings from Daniel's hand.

"Whaaa-tchu gooot, Saam?" Jack asked trying to crane his neck to see what was in Sam's hand.

“They're our wedding rings, Jack," Sam said, holding them over so that he could see them.

"Whaat dey for?" Jack asked, his brows knitted into a look of confusion.

"You bought them for our wedding. We exchanged them when we got married. See?" Sam pointed to their wedding picture on Jack's bedside table.

"Oh. One miiine?" he asked, still looking at the picture.

"Yes, Jack. One of them is yours. Do you want it on?" Sam asked, hoping that he would say yes, hoping that he remembered.

“Yeah," Jack said. He tried to smile, but it looked more like a grimace.

Daniel's lips spread into a wide smile as he watched Sam slide Jack's ring onto his finger and then put her own on her finger. He turned his head to the side to allow them a moment of privacy when Sam leaned over and gave Jack a kiss. A tap at the door broke the moment.

"Hello everyone," a chipper voice said from the doorway.

"Hi, Julie," Sam greeted the therapist.

"Are you ready for therapy, Jack?" Julie asked, sitting her bag on the coffee table.

Jack shot her an angry glare. "No!"

"Jack! Don't be rude," Sam admonished him.

Jack hung his head. He didn't mean to be rude, he was enjoying being with Sam and Daniel. Tears began to pour from his eyes and he started to sob. "S-s-s-r-r-r-y, S-s-sa-a-mm. I-I dn't m-m-mean to ma-make you ma-ma-mad."

"Oh, Jack. Honey, you didn't make me mad. I just said for you not to be rude to Julie. I'm sorry that I upset you," Sam said as she gave Jack a comforting hug.

Jack pulled back and looked down at the shiny gold wedding band on his finger. “Y-y-ou s'ill loo-vveess mmme?"

Sam reached over and grabbed a tissue from the bedside table. She lovingly wiped the tears from his cheeks before she responded. "Of course I still love you, Jack. I always will, no matter what."

" 'kay, Ssaam. Iiiiiee loooves you too."

Sam smiled and gently ran her hand across Jack's cheek. "You do good with therapy. Daniel and I are going to go to the cafeteria for dinner. We'll be back in an hour. Okay, Jack?"

"'kay, Sa-am," Jack said as he lifted a shaky hand to her.

Sam took his hand and held it to her cheek, savoring the warm feeling of it against her skin. After a minute, she got up from the bed and leaned over to give him a kiss on the lips. "I'll see in you in an hour, Jack."

Jack gave her a spastic nod before she turned and walked toward the door with Daniel following behind.

 

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Andy walked quickly down the hall toward his dad's room, thinking about the events of the last two weeks since his parent's anniversary party. Tom, his dad's physical therapist, had been working with him on going to the bathroom and finally, three days ago, they were successful. It was a very big deal for his dad and Andy was proud of him. His father's speech had been improving quite a bit as well. All day at school, he watched the clock and counted down the minutes until school was out so that he could go to the hospital with his dad and help him work on his speech. By the time he got to his father's door, he felt fit to burst with excitement.

"Hey, Dad!" Andy greeted cheerfully as he bounced into Jack's room.

"Hey, Aany," Jack replied, smiling.

"I brought the ABC cards that I told you about," Andy said as he tossed his back pack on the couch. He unzipped it and reached in, pulling out a box of flashcards. He pulled the table tray over to Jack's bed before crawling up beside him, his arms wrapped around him in a hug.

"Hawa koul, Aany?" Jack asked obviously frustrated that it didn't sound right.

"School was fun. Today we learned about Gettysburg in history. I had a test in math, but I don't think that I did very good on it," he replied, taking the cards from the box.

Jack looked sadly at him. "Sre."

"Don't be sorry, Dad. I don't like math. Are you ready to start?"

Jack nodded so he picked up the card with the letter A and a picture of an apple on it. "This is the letter A. Say A, Dad," Andy pointed at the letter as he spoke, flashing Jack an encouraging smile.

"Aaaaa," Jack said, studying the card.

Andy had promised to come in every day after to school to help his dad with his speech, a task that he took very seriously. He talked to his teachers and went to the library to get books and materials to help him. Shellie, Jack's speech therapist, had met with him as well and they formed a team to get Jack talking as if nothing had happened to him. So he did the flash cards with his dad until his dad's occupational therapist came.

"Hey, Jack! How's it going with Andy today?" Julie asked, her lips turned into her usual smile.

"' kay. Haaaaf'n f-f-funnn," Jack replied slightly grumpy that his time with Andy was interrupted.

"I was teaching him to say the alphabet with these flashcards," Andy added with pride, then lovingly patted Jack's arm. He was proud that he was allowed to help his dad.

"Well now, that does sound like fun," Julie said, setting her bag on the bedside table. "Are you ready to do some work now, Jack?"

Jack wrinkled his face. "Hnoo."

"Aw. Come on, Jack. I'm not that bad am I?" Julie said with mock sadness.

"Hno waaan-nu."

"It'll help you get better so you can come home, Dad," Andy put on his best pouty look. "Will ya do it for me?"

Jack's lips turned into a crooked smile. "'kay, Aany."

"Good," Andy said with a big smile. "I'm gonna go over here and do my homework. You be good and do your therapy."

"Hnnoo gooo, A-aannyyy!" Jack protested.

"I'll just be right over here, Daddy. I'm not goin' anywhere 'til tonight. Promise," Andy comforted him.

"'kay," Jack said quietly. His head bowed down.

Andy gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek and walked over to the couch. He pulled out his math book and after a quick glance up at Jack to make sure he was okay, he went to work on his homework.

"We'll start with the pegs for a bit. I arranged for them to bring your dinner tray up early today so we can work on feeding yourself. Okay, Jack?" Julie said, hoping that the prospect of independence would be the incentive to get Jack motivated and stay on task.

Jack grunted as Julie removed his braces from his hands and then unloaded a wooden board with holes drilled into it and a plastic box of multi-colored pegs onto the table tray. Julie could tell that, despite Jack usually liking this activity, today wasn't going to be a good day with him. In the ten years that she had been a therapist, she had learned how to interpret a brain injury patient's behavior and what was to be expected with it. Over the past few months, she really gotten to know Jack and his personal behaviors, learning the signs of frustration and agitation. She memorized them and the things that worked to settle him down and refocus.

"Okay, Jack. Why don't you start by using your right hand to put the pegs in the first row?" Julie instructed in a cheerful tone. Sadness gripped her heart when he tried to reach up with his shaky left hand. "Jack, can you use your right hand to grab the pegs?"

Jack's brows furrowed as he stared down at his hands, his confusion apparent on his face. He had been confusing his left with his right and at times like this, it caused his frustration level to sky rocket. Julie watched him, trying to come up with an idea to help him. As he turned his hands over an idea struck her.

"Jack. Your right hand is the one with your hospital ID bracelet on it."

Jack's eyes fell upon the bracelet on his right wrist, realization registered on his face and he slowly raised his right hand to the table. His hand trembled as he tried to grasp his spastic fingers around a peg. Naturally, his fingers didn't seem to want to obey his commands and his frustration began to mount. After a few minutes, they finally wrapped around a peg and he slowly moved it toward the board. It took a few tries but he managed to wrestle it into a hole, sweat dotting his forehead. The next few minutes, he got another peg in, but it was getting harder for him to do and he was getting to his limit with his frustration. Julie patted his hand with encouragement and smiled at him. With a grunt he picked up another peg. His breath came in huffs as he moved the peg to the board and slid it immediately into the next hole. Jack squealed with joy, beginning to laugh at his accomplishment, but as quickly as it started, the laugh was gone. The sound of his own laughter seemed to scare him.

"Good job, Jack!" Julie said cheerfully. Glancing at her watch she continued, “How about we put these away for today? Your dinner will be here soon."

Jack remained quiet, his right hand nervously picking at the chin strap of his helmet. He watched as Julie put the pegs and board back into her bag then begin to remove other things. She laid a spoon with a large rubber handle on the table, a plate with a lip on it that arced over the bowl to help him scoop up his food, a sippy cup with handles on both sides, a yellow hand towel with a hole in the middle, and a blue weight with Velcro on it to strap onto Jack's wrist so his hand won't shake when he eats.

"This spoon has a big grip on it so it will be easier for you to pick it up and keep your hold on it." She picked up the towel and unfolded it. "This has a hole in it so you can slip it over your head. It'll help to keep you clean when you eat."

No sooner had she spoken the last word when a young girl brought Jack's dinner tray in and put it on the table tray in front of him. She helped Jack slide the towel bib over his head before lifting the lid off the plate. 

Julie had arranged for the baked fish to be diced into small pieces and ordered mashed potatoes so it would be easier for him to pick the food up with the spoon, since he could pretty much eat anything except tough meat. She poured his juice into the sippy cup and put it within his reach. Jack anxiously watched her as she put the weight bracelet on his wrist, eyeballing it as if it would tell him why it was there.

"Okay, Jack. Go ahead and pick up the spoon and get a bite of food," Julie instructed as she gently nudged the spoon toward him.

Jack eyed the spoon as if not trusting it or maybe not trusting himself. He slowly lifted his right hand toward the spoon and his long slender fingers wrapped around the thick rubber grip. A slight smile formed on lips when he scooped the spoon through the mashed potatoes and up the plastic lip of the bowl. Now all he had to do was get it to his mouth. Beads of sweat formed on his brow from the intense concentration that he put forth. Just as the spoon neared his mouth the blob of potatoes plopped down onto his chest. A loud irritated grunt escaped his lips, tears began to well in his eyes.

"Easy, Jack. It'll take time," Julie consoled him, placing her hand on top of his. “Come on now. Try again."

So, again Jack's tremulous hand scooped up more potatoes and moved the spoon towards his mouth. The potatoes smeared his face as the spoon caught the corner of his mouth on its way between his lips. A tear streamed down his cheek, yet a small smile of accomplishment formed. Though he got most in his mouth, by the end of the meal, Jack's face and chest were coated with food. He was agitated and crying despite Julie's repeated efforts to praise and reassure him. Even though Julie knew that it was all common effects of a brain injury, the knowledge never made it any easier to watch a patient struggle.

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Sam stood at the kitchen window, looking at the shadows that the moon cast across the back yard. After she had put Andy to bed, she had decided to have a cup of tea to try and relax. Her mind went back over the reports that she had got from his therapists while she waited for the tea kettle to whistle. They all said that Jack was making good progress, though he still struggled with his speech and memory. It had been a very long and trying few months and for Jack, it was going to get worse. He won the fight for his life, now the fight to get back to his life was just beginning. Though she was thankful that he was alive, it broke her heart to see how he was, how he struggled to do things that most people took for granted: talking, walking, reading. 

The high pitched whistle from the tea kettle echoed throughout the dead silence of the kitchen causing her to jump.

As Sam fixed herself a cup of tea, she looked up at the calendar on the wall. Jack would be coming home in fifteen days. Sam went down into the lounge and snuggled into the couch. After another sip of tea, she glanced back the hallway at the plastic tarp that covered the bathroom door. It was the last of the renovations on the house and it was nearly done.

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Sam could barely contain her excitement as she pulled the truck into a parking space in the lot at the hospital. As she walked into the building, she went over in her mind the events that happened over the past few days and how to tell Jack about them in a way that he would understand. She had brought Polaroids of what had been done to the house to show him and a few items from the house, plus some things she bought at the store on the way to the hospital. On top of the pictures, she had a stack of cards from just about his whole neighborhood. Once Mrs. Forman had gotten the grapevine going, it didn't take long for all of Colorado Springs to know about Jack's situation, that in itself set about a chain of events that still had Sam's head reeling. It all started with an article in the paper about Jack's getting hurt “training the future of our great nation's defense" as the newspapers said. Next, cards with well wishes came pouring in, followed by donations of money, food, toys for Andy, adaptive equipment for the house, and countless other articles, including a fully equipped handicapped van.

Her smile widened when she walked to the elevators, her foot tapping nervously as the elevator made its way to the second floor. It felt like an eternity until it finally dinged its arrival and the doors opened. It took all she had not to run down the hall to his room. She arrived at his door to find his room empty. She put the bags down on the table and walked over to Jack's schedule board to see where he was and noting that he was scheduled for physical therapy, she left to go there.


	21. Chapter 21

Jack's Journal: Wednesday, September 25, 2002

Your new wheelchair comes tomorrow. I can't tell you about it since I haven't seen it myself. It's to be a surprise for the both of us I guess. They finished working on the house today. Just about everyone at the SGC and our neighborhood pitched in to get it done. Now all that's left to do is label things and most importantly, bring you home!

They came in a while ago to help you bathe and shave. It wasn't one of your better times. When they went to put you back into bed, you jerked and slipped out of Tami's hand. You landed right on your left hip and howled in pain. It was nobody's fault, but we all felt badly about it. They finished up and Janet came in and gave you something for the pain. After the meds kicked in, you settled down and fell right off to sleep. One thing that hasn't changed with you, Jack, is your determination. You are still pushing yourself more than you should be.

You have come a long way in the past six months, Jack. I'm very, very proud of you. Everyone is proud of you.

Seven more days until you come home! I can't wait!

Love always,  
Sam

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After lunch, Jack settled down for a nap, so Sam decided to busy herself by putting Jack's clothes away that she had just brought back from washing the night before. She'd just put his last pair of sweatpants into his drawer, when Daniel and Janet walked in with Jack's new wheelchair. The frame of it was a pretty shade of red, with a black low-back seat and thick, plastic wheel spokes. The handles on the back were one piece, similar to the handle on a baby stroller. The foot rests came together in a fashion that made them look as though they were one single piece with hinges for them to swing out of the way when Jack wanted to stand. There was a bright red backpack hanging off of the back of the wheelchair between the handles.

“Hey, Sam. Here's Jack's very own wheelchair. What do you think?" Daniel asked excitedly.

Sam was speechless, tears welled in her eyes. "It's great. I don't know what to say. Thank you."

"Jack's really going to like this. It's lightweight and will be easy for him to maneuver. It has attachments such as a drink holder and a tray that'll attach to the arm rests. We got him this backpack for it and this pouch here at the seat," Janet explained as she motioned to the various parts of the wheelchair. “He can use for his day planner and writing utensils. How's he doing?"

"He's doing good today. He fell asleep about an hour ago," Sam said. She laid a gentle hand on Jacks arm.

They chatted for another hour while Jack slept. A rustle from the bed caught her attention, looking down, she saw two chocolate brown eyes staring back up at her. "Hey, Jack. I'm glad you're awake. Daniel and Janet are here to see you and they brought you your new wheelchair," Sam said cheerfully.

Jack bobbed his head and shifted his body to look over to where Daniel and Janet stood near his shiny new wheelchair. "Haaeey Dan' l Jjjjanett!" Jack greeted them.

"Hey yourself, Jack," Daniel replied.

"Hello, Jack. Do you want to try out your new wheels?" Janet asked.

"Yeaaahhh," Jack squealed with excitement. His arms and legs jerked as he tried to get out of the bed.

Sam was glad that she hadn't zipped the netting closed while Jack was sleeping. He was so excited to get out of bed that having to have taken the extra time to unzip and pull back the netting would have made him upset. While Daniel helped Sam lift Jack into his new wheelchair, she couldn't help thinking back over the past few months when she helped the nurses. Jack's arm flopped around her neck, snapping her back to the present. He was trying to help them get him into the chair, and it made Sam smile. He was making an effort and she was proud. Finally, he was in and Sam bent over and buckled his safety vest. Even though he was getting more strength in his abdominal muscles and he could hold himself up, he still would slump to his left due to the weakness on that side.

"So, what do you think, Jack? Do you like it?" Sam asked, then smiled.

"Yeea-sth," Jack replied enthusiastically, his body bucking and jerking with joy.

"Your therapists here will help you learn how to use it and all of its functions. Okay, Jack?" Janet said.

"O-kaayy, Jjjaan-ett," Jack said. His face scrunched up into what was his version of a smile.

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Jack's hand shook as he tried to move the big plastic clip over the arch made of PVC pipe. His occupational therapist watched him closely with a hopeful expression. His arms were much stronger, though the weakness in his left arm was still presenting a problem. So, today Julie decided to concentrate on exercises to strengthen that arm. A slight sheen of sweat began to form on his face, his frustration beginning to grow as his hand began to shake more. Julie noticed that Jack was getting too frustrated so she decided to intervene. "You're doing great with your arms, Jack. The strength is coming back perfectly," Julie said in her usual sing song voice, the tight curls in her bright red hair bouncing with each movement of her head.

Jack smiled at the praise, the frustration slowly dissipating. "Iss harrt," Jack said quietly, his voice sounding a bit nasal.

"I know it's hard, Jack. It'll take time for your left arm to get better. Just be patient with yourself," Julie put her hand on Jack's. "Jack, you were injured very badly and spent a long time in a deep coma. You need to give yourself time to heal. Okay?"

"Yeah," Jack replied, his face drawn in frustration.

"I think that's all we'll do for today," Julie said as she began to pack up her stuff. "Is there anything that you need before I go?"

"No," Jack replied quietly.

"Do you want to sit by the window until Sam comes?" Julie asked in a cheerful voice. When Jack nodded, she set her bag by the arch on the table and pushed Jack's wheelchair over to the big window in his room. "Anything else, Jack?"

"No."

"Okay. I'll see you next time. Bye, Jack."

"Bye," Jack replied without moving his eyes from the window.

Jack sat in his wheelchair, staring out of the window and waiting for Sam. She was at work, but had promised him that she would be there to have lunch with him. He watched as people went about their way, cars going up and down the street. A boy rode his bicycle through the grass sending a flock of pigeons flying into the air.

Flying! The word rolled around in his head. What did it mean to him? Why would he be thinking of that?

Jack's attention went back to the people, watching them walk from one place to another. The more his eyes took in their movements of their legs, the more he wondered about his own. Tom was the only one who had said anything about why his body didn't work the way it should, but he didn't say the how. It wasn't just the problem with his body that bothered Jack, he found himself wondering again what else wasn't working with him, why he didn't talk like other people or do things like eating and dressing like they did. He had a sense that he never had been like this, but how would he know? He didn't remember anything from 'before'. Was there a before?

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Sam stood quietly in the doorway of Jack's room and looked at him as he watched the activity outside of his window. His long slender arms lay on the wheelchair's arm rest leaving his fingers dangling over his legs. The light blue hospital pajamas that hung loose from his body showed the amount of weight that he had lost over the past few months. The sunlight gleamed off of the hockey helmet on his head. He looked so lost and lonely sitting there. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she walked over to him. "Hey, Jack!" Sam said in her best cheerful voice.

His head jerked around, his deep chocolate eyes focusing on her bright blue ones. His lips turned into a smile. "Heyyy, Ssaam," Jack's voice was low and the words drawn out, but oh it was music to her ears.

"Sorry I wasn't here earlier. Janet stopped by my lab and we got to talking."

"Sss'okay. You heeerre n-now," Jack said, reaching his right hand out to her. His struggle to find the right words and then to say them was apparent.

Sam took it and held it tightly, leaning down and kissing him on the lips. She straightened and smiled down at him. There was something about that moment in time that made her realize the love that they still had and that, no matter what the future held for them, they would make it through it together.

"Do you want to go to the table now? Lunch will be here soon," Sam asked still holding his hand.

Jack nodded so she grabbed the handles of the wheelchair and drove him over to the mini dining table, carefully pushing him up to it so as not to bump his knees off of the edge. After giving him a peck on the cheek, she took the seat next to him. They chatted pleasantly until his lunch tray arrived.

When his tray was placed in front of Jack, Sam helped him put his bib on then took her salad out of her lunch sack. She watched Jack eat with pride. A few months ago, they'd wondered if he would ever be able to do it and here he was, despite the effort it took for him, doing it. Granted, it was a messy event and he struggled just to get the food to his mouth, but he was feeding himself!


	22. Chapter 22

A loud crash echoed throughout Jack's room as his lunch tray fell to the floor, splattering food everywhere. Sam jumped from her seat to help Jack as the seizure took hold of him, trying desperately to keep him from falling out of his wheelchair though he was buckled in. The seizure only lasted two minutes, but to Sam it was nothing short of an eternity. She gently cradled Jack's head against her chest as she hit the panic button near the dining table of his room, taking comfort in the gentle snores emanating from him.

"What's wrong, Sam?" Janet said as she rushed into the room. She had been working on Jack's chart at the nurse's station when the signal went off for Jack's room.

"We were eating and he started having a seizure," Sam replied in an emotionally tight voice.

Janet busied herself checking Jack over to make sure he didn't have any food in his mouth and was breathing okay. When she was satisfied that he was okay, she put a comforting hand on Sam's. "He seems to be alright. Would you help me get him onto the bed so we can change his clothes? Then he can sleep it off."

Sam nodded, then pushed Jack's wheelchair over to his bed. Once there, Janet knelt down in front of him and placed a soft hand on his cheek. "Jack? Come on, time to wake up?" Janet said consolingly.

Slowly, Jack's eyes opened and looked blearily at Janet. He looked lost and confused. "Mmmwwaahhs," It was all that Jack could manage. His voice was strained and his speech slurred.

Quickly and easily, Janet and Sam unbuckled Jack and lifted him up onto his bed. Janet held him upright while Sam stripped off his t-shirt.

"What?" Janet asked when Sam stopped short and gasped.

"Look at that bruising on his ribs!" she exclaimed.

Janet tightened her hold on Jack and looked up to where Sam was pointing, gasping herself at the dotted bruising on Jack's ribs and shoulders.

"What could have happened?" Sam asked, sickened at the sight.

Janet peered at them extensively. "I don't know, but they look like finger marks. As if someone was pinching him or something," Janet replied still examining the marks.

 

"But who?" Sam asked, mulling over in her mind who all had been around Jack that would hurt him.  
"I don't know, but one way or another we are going to find out!" Janet said seriously, anger dripping from her words. How the hell could anyone hurt a brain injured person? she thought.

After changing Jack's t-shirt, they set to work changing his pants and noticed that his knees also had the same pattern of bruising. Both women felt sick to their stomachs. How could this have gone on without anyone noticing?

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General Hammond slammed his fist on his desk and stood with an angry huff, causing Sam and Janet to jump. He about blew a head gasket when Sam and Janet had informed of their suspicions that Jack has been abused by an unknown person. Hadn't Jack been through enough? Now some son of a bitch was abusing a nearly defenseless man. "Do either of you have any idea who could be doing this?" he asked, anger dripping from his words.

"No, Sir. The only people that have been near Jack is the staff at the hospital and us," Janet replied in a perplexed tone. "But, Sam has noticed that Jack gets nervous when that night nurse Daphne is around him."

"I don't suppose that Jack can tell us if she is the one who has been hurting him?" Hammond asked.

"No, I've asked him who hurt him and all he says is that he doesn't know," Sam answered sadly.

"Is it possible that he does remember and is afraid to say?" the still fuming General asked.

"Yes, Sir, it is. From the amount of bruising, I'd say that it's been happening quite frequently. If an event repeatedly happens, Jack will remember it. He may be saying that he doesn't remember out of fear of more abuse or he's been threatened not to tell, but, honestly, with Jack's impairments, it's really hard to say for sure," Janet informed them, all the while thinking to herself that it was more likely that Jack was afraid to tell.

"I'm going to have a talk with Sergeant Siler and see if he can rig up a hidden security camera in Jack's room. We're going to get whoever is doing this and find out why," Hammond vowed.

Afer a quick call was placed to Siler and the Sergeant confirmed that he could rig the camera, Janet, George, and Sam began formulating a plan.

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Janet sat in her office in the company of George Hammond and two Security Forces, watching Sam give Jack a kiss goodnight. Sergeant Siler had wired the hidden camera in Jack's room to a monitor in Janet's office. The camera, cleverly disguised as teddy bear dressed in hockey garb, kept a watchful eye over Jack's entire room. Sam winked at the camera before walking out of the room, leaving Jack at his desk practicing his writing. Five minutes later, Sam joined them in Janet's office.

At ten o'clock on the dot, Daphne strolled into Jack's room. Everyone leaned over in their chairs, watching intently as the nurse took a hold of the handles on Jack's wheelchair and pushed him toward the bed. Tears welled in Sam's eyes when she saw Jack begin to tremble at the sight of the evil woman.

"Well, retard, I hear you're going home in a few days," Daphne said, then dug the knuckle of her index finger into the tip of Jack's nose. "I can't say that I'll miss ya, but, the only thing that bothers me is that you aren't going to the morgue. Though, that could easily be arranged. There are still a few days here to go yet."

Daphne knew that she was supposed to help Jack to the bathroom, but she didn't give a shit. He could piss himself for all she cared. Soon, he wouldn't be her problem, and if she had her way, with a little more time, he wouldn't be anybody's problem.

With a wicked grin, Daphne undid Jack's lap buckle and got behind his chair again. She lifted up on the back with a sharp jerk, tipping the chair forward and sending Jack sprawling to the floor. He cried out and screeched in pain as he crumbled, no doubt in agony from his achy hips and legs.

She feigned a concerned gasp. "Oh, Jack! What did you do? You went and fell out of your chair!" The terrible woman cackled and crouched down by Jack as he tried to cringe away from her, sobbing. It delighted Daphne even more to see the urine stain spreading down the front of Jack's sweatpants. "Oh, you fucking retard! You've pissed your pants, too."

"Wh-why... you... hur-hurtin'... m-m-me?" Jack asked in a scared and confused voice.

"Because you fucking ruined my life, you stupid son of a bitch! You should've died back on that damned planet like you were supposed to," Daphne barked at him, her voice hissing with rage.

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Sam and Janet watched with horrified expressions as the shocking scene unfolded. Seeing Jack hit the floor with a hard thud was it, they'd had enough! They raced out of the office with the two Security Forces in tow. They rushed into Jack's room just as Daphne had her claws ready to sink into Jack's arm.

"Get the hell away from him!" Janet yelled angrily.

Daphne spun around with a shocked expression pasted on her face, only to have it knocked off by Sam's fist slamming into her jaw.

"What the hell? I..." Daphne stammered, rubbing her smarting jaw.

"You're going to have to be more careful, nurse. Slipping and hurting yourself like that," Janet said in a condescending tone.

The two Security Forces grabbed Daphne's arms, pulling them behind her back to cuff them. After an approving nod from Sam, they began to lead the abusive nurse out of Jack's room.

"He fell and I was just trying to help him!" Daphne shouted back over her shoulder as she was lead down the hall.

Sam glared toward the door briefly before turning her attention back to Jack.

"Let's get him up off of the floor and then we can get him cleaned up," Janet said and gently rubbed Jack's arm. "Are you okay, Jack?"

"I hurt-ed. I p-p-eed mine pants," Jack replied sadly. "I sorries."

"You have no reason to be sorry, Jack. I'm the one who is sorry. I should have come sooner to help you," she said, then gave him a chaste kiss.

Carefully, Sam and Janet lifted Jack up onto his bed. Both worked quickly and easily to get him cleaned up. When they completed their ministrations, Janet left the room to get Jack some pain medication. Sam curled up on the bed beside Jack, lovingly massaging his arm and talking softly to calm him.

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Julie smiled as she watched Jack diligently practice his handwriting. Although, it was a struggle for him, he persevered and now could write in his journal himself with prompting as to what to write. 

His hand trembled slightly as he gripped the large primary pencil and slowly scrawled a short sentence about his therapy session in his log book. Jack laid the pencil down on the desk and looked up at Julie,his mouth turned into a wide smile. The script was similar to that of a third grader, large and squiggly, but it was a huge accomplishment for Jack. "I did it! Cn't wait to tell Sam 'n Andy," Jack said proudly.

"Yes, Jack, you did it. I'm very proud of you and so will Sam and Andy," Julie replied. "Now, how about you start getting washed up for lunch?"

"Yeah," Jack replied reluctantly. He still had a hard time switching his attention from one activity to another.

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"Dad, you have to pay attention. You won't get better if ya don't practice," Andy said as he tried to redirect Jack's attention back to the notebook. Andy was helping his father practice his reading and writing at the dining table in Jack's room, but Jack's attention was on Sam. He watched as she folded his clothes and put them neatly into the suitcase.

"Why she doin' dat?" Jack asked, his eyes not leaving Sam.

"Mom's just packin' your stuff cause you're goin' home tomorrow," Andy replied.

"I go home?" Jack asked, looking at Andy in obvious confusion.

"Yeah, don't ya remember?"

Before Jack could answer, a knock came from the door. The door swung open to admit Janet and Cassie into the room. Sam laid the last pair of Jack's sweatpants into the suitcase then turned to smile at their friends. "Hey, guys," Sam greeted.

"Hi, Sam. I came to get Andy," Cassie replied then she turned her attention to Jack. "Hey, Uncle Jack."

A big smile spread across Jack's lips and his eyes widened with delight. "Hi, Casssie!"

"Andy, get your stuff gathered up," Sam said as she walked over toward the table.

"Aw, Mom. Do I hafta go?" Andy whined.

"Yes, you do. You have school tomorrow and your Dad is going home."

"Okay," Andy replied reluctantly. He was glad that his dad was finally going home, but he didn't want to leave him. He reached over and lovingly patted his father's bony hand before he stood to go put his things in his backpack.

Jack watched forlornly as Andy put his tablet and reading book in his backpack, then zipped it shut. Had he done something wrong that his son was leaving? His head began to hurt, a dull ache in the back of his head was spreading into a thunderous thump throughout his skull. Flashes of brightly colored lights flashed behind his eyelids as his hands flew up to his head, a screech escaped his lips as the pain escalated.

"Mom, something's wrong with Dad!" Andy yelled when he saw his father digging his fists into the sides of his head and his face scrunched in pain.

"Jack? What's wrong?" Sam asked as she rushed to him and rubbed his back. Her only reply was a long, drawn out moan.

“He's having a migraine," Janet said placing a gentle hand on Jack's shoulder. “I'll go and get his medicine. Hold on, Jack."

Sam continued to rub Jack's back until Janet returned and gave him his medication. Cassie hugged Andy to her as Jack's moans slowly began to quiet down.

"Ya feel better now, Daddy?" Andy asked.

"Y-y-e-a-a, Jack replied sleepily.

"Let's get you to your bed so you can lay down and get some rest," Janet said then pushed Jack's wheelchair over to his bed.

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An hour after Andy and Cassie had left, Jack was still asleep. He always slept for at least an hour and a half after he had a migraine or a seizure. Janet and Sam sat at the table, signing the forms needed to enroll Jack at the Oak Hill Center's adult rehabilitation program. It was a program specially designed for adults with a severe traumatic brain injury. Jack was to begin the program the day after his discharge and continue it until his evaluation after three months. After the papers were signed, Janet gave Jack a quick check up without waking him and then she left for the night.

Sam curled up on the couch and began to write in Jack's journal, stopping periodically to check on Jack. She wrote for a while before she fell asleep.


	23. Chapter 23

Jack's Journal-Tuesday, October 1, 2002:

Well, my love, you finally get to go home tomorrow! Andy and I are so excited, but, I have to admit that I'm scared. What if something happens to you? What if you have a seizure? Will I know how to help you? What if I don't know what to do? So many what ifs. Too many. I hate myself for that to be honest. I want to just be glad that you are alive and that you are coming home, but the worry creeps in. I'm just so scared that I won't be able to handle it and that I'll fail you.

Andy can't wait for you to be home. He took index cards and markers to make labels for everything in the house for you: couch, chair, cabinet, etc. All of the cabinets are labeled as to what is in them as are the drawers, even the dresser drawers. He also set up reminder boards in all of the rooms. They have lists of things that you need to do in each room in the order that you need to do them and what time you need to do them. Janet wrote everything out for him. For example, in the bathroom he has a board for in the morning and one for bedtime. The first thing on both is for you to brush your teeth and he has the steps listed for you to do it. He helped me set up the schedule board in the kitchen. You would have been so proud if you could have seen him work on it. Don't worry! He did his homework first.

Janet told me about the day hospital that she enrolled you in. Its at the Oak Hill Rehabilitation Center on the west side of town. You'll go there Monday through Friday from 8 am to 3 pm. You'll ride a short bus there and back. You'll get all of your therapies there: physical, occupational, and speech. They also have a school program where they'll work with you on reading, writing, and math among other subjects.

You are sleeping again. No doubt out for the night. You had a migraine a while ago and you took a nap after, and Andy didn't want to leave you, but after a lot assurance from Janet that you were alright, he went home. I can't help but wonder if you even realize that you are going home.

I wanted to apologize to you, Jack. I'm sorry that things went on for as long as they did with Daphne. I should have seen it and put stop to it, but I didn't. I failed you and I'm sorry. You don't seem to remember it, either that, or you aren't letting it bother you. Her nursing license was revoked and she'll be joining Dane in prison for a very long time. I hope that they both rot there for what they have done to you.

Well, sleep well, my love. It's home tomorrow!

Love,  
Sam 

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It was an unseasonably warm day, the sun shined bright in the sky and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. A light breeze blew and the ground was totally free of snow. Jack's head bobbed around and he made gasping noises with his mouth. When they began to help him into the minivan, he got agitated making it known that he wanted to be outside. He had a good morning so far, but he seemed totally oblivious to the fact that he was going home.

From the front seat of the minivan, Jack took in all the sights around him as though he had never seen them before. Fear and curiosity filled his eyes, his head bobbed in all directions. Sam kept one hand on the steering wheel and rubbed his hand with the other. The trip home went smoothly, but by the time Sam pulled the silver minivan into the driveway, Jack was slightly agitated. She turned the ignition off and breathed a sigh of relief. She had asked that no one come to visit Jack for a few days so he could adjust to being home and she was glad that they had obeyed her wishes. Sam looked over at him with a concerned expression and saw him sitting there, shaking and pulling at the chin strap of his hockey helmet.

"What's wrong, Jack?" Sam asked, gently rubbing his leg in an effort to calm him.

"Dunno," Jack replied quietly, his voice thick with apprehension. He continued pulling at his chin strap with his right hand while the left curled around his stuffed dog.

"Do you wanna go inside now? Andy will be home from school soon."

"Yeah," Jack answered, then looked at the door with confusion, like he knew that was the way out, but didn't know what to do to get out.

"Just wait a minute, Jack. I'll come around and help you to get out," Sam told him, then leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. 

Sam got out of the van and walked around to the sliding door, opening it so she could pull Jack's wheelchair out. After the wheelchair was out, Sam opened Jack's door and helped him take a few shaky steps to get in it. She grabbed his duffel bag with his remaining items from the hospital and hooked it onto her arm, silently thanking Daniel and Janet for taking most of Jack's things home yesterday. Jack looked around as Sam pushed up the ramp to the front door. A gasp came from Jack as they entered the house, his head bobbing in all directions. Sam couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking, if he remembered their home. It hadn't changed much after they renovations, just wider doorways and grab bars along the walls.

"Do you want to go into the living room and watch television until Andy comes home?" Sam asked.

"Wanna go bed," Jack replied, his voice flat.

"Okay, Jack," Sam turned his wheelchair toward the bedroom. "I'm really glad that you're home, Jack. It wasn't the same around here without you."

"Yeah."

When they got to the bedroom, Sam parked Jack's wheelchair beside the bed and undid his safety belt. She helped him to sit on the edge of the bed. He kept himself propped up with his right arm while Sam took off his tennis shoes and socks.

Sam helped him to lay down and cover him up before giving him a kiss on the lips. "I love you, Jack. Thanks for coming home to me."

"Luvs you too, Sam," Jack replied, his eyes already beginning to drift shut. The trip home had been very exhausting for him, physically and mentally.

Sam smiled and a tear rolled down her cheek as she looked down at Jack who was already snoring. After giving him a soft kiss on the cheek, she flipped on the baby monitor and left the room.

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Jack, Sam, and Andy sat cuddled on the chair watching the Simpsons and eating popcorn. Andy was excited when he came home and saw that his dad was finally home. Sam smiled when she looked over at the men in her life, leaning on each other and fast asleep. 

She gently slid herself out from under Jack's arm and stood up. After putting her bowl of popcorn on the coffee table, she walked over and flipped off the television then made her way back over to the couch. Bending over, she put her hand on her son's shoulder and gave him a little shake. "Andy," she said quietly, “why don't you head to bed, sweetie?"

"Okay, Mom. Do you need any help with Dad?" Andy asked sleepily as he sat up.

"Can you push his wheelchair a bit closer for me, please?"

"Sure," Andy replied and then let out a big yawn.

By the time he got the wheelchair situated close to the couch, Sam had Jack awake and halfway standing up. Getting a sleepy Jack into the wheelchair was a hard task, but between her and Andy, they got him in. Sam pushed Jack's wheelchair down the hall to their bedroom with Andy in tow. When they got to Andy's bedroom door, they all exchanged hugs and kisses before saying goodnight, Andy went in his room while Sam continued on with Jack. 

Andy went to crawl into bed since he was already in his favorite dinosaur pajamas, but he realized that he forgot to get a glass of water. With an exasperated grunt, he ambled back out of his room to the kitchen. After he got his water he turned to go back to his room and saw Jack's stuffed dog laying on the couch. Remembering that his dad would likely get upset without it, Andy picked it up and walked back to his parents' bedroom. He got to their bedroom just as Sam had given Jack the last of his pills and was helping Jack to lay down. 

"Mom, I found Dad's dog on the couch and I thought that he might want it," Andy said as he walked toward the bed and handed the stuffed dog to Jack.

"T'anks. Will ya sleep wif us, Andy?" Jack asked as he took the dog from the boy.

The boy looked at Sam. “Can I, Mom?"

Sam looked back and forth at the hopeful expressions on her husband and son's faces. She understood why the request was made; Andy wanted to be with his father and Jack was scared his first night home. "Oh, alright. Just get into bed while I go shut the lights off."

"Thanks, Mom!" Andy replied excitedly, crawled into bed next to Jack, and with a yawn, snuggled up to his dad's side. 

Sam smiled at the sight of them and went off to shut out the lights. By the time she returned to the bedroom, the two of them were sound asleep. As she climbed into bed, joy flooded her heart. It felt good to have Jack back at home and for the three of them to be together again as a family.


	24. Chapter 24

It was a bright and sunny Saturday and so far, a good day for Jack. He had started his morning routine on his own and made a huge effort to help Sam prepare the food. Sam beamed with pride as she watched him refer to the list of what he had to do to help. Granted, seeing him struggling was hard, but he was doing it! He was excited that everyone was coming to see him because he hadn't seen them since he came home from the hospital. They had called to see how he was doing, but they stayed away to give him time to adjust to the change.

"Mom, Grandpa George is here!" Andy yelled when he saw the General's car pull into their driveway.

"Okay. Can you open the door for him, honey?" Sam called from the kitchen where Jack was helping her get the meal ready.

“Hi, George!" Jack cried happily as Hammond walked into the kitchen.

"Hello, Jack. What are you making there?" George asked.

"Pashed motatoes!" Jack replied as he stirred the potatoes in the bowl.

Sam shot George a 'Just go with it' look and smiled. George nodded his understanding. Jack had been having trouble mixing up the beginning sounds of words or using the opposite word than the one he should. So far he seemed totally oblivious to the mistakes and he would break down in tears if he was pointedly corrected, so subtlety had been a quickly learned trait for all around him.

"Yes, you are," Sam said as she patted Jack's shoulder then looked at George with a smile, "He made the mashed potatoes all by himself. The only thing I did was drain them."

"Well, I can't wait to try them."

By seven-thirty, Teal'c arrived with Janet, Daniel, and Cassie. They all sat around the table and enjoyed the meal together. Jack enjoyed the company, but it wore him out. The sleepier he got, the slower he became. Sam convinced him to go to bed and he tearfully agreed. After getting him ready and into bed, Sam went out and joined the others for coffee.

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"Sammy, what I need ta take wid me?" Jack asked as he held tightly to his red backpack and looked around the living room with a puzzled expression on his face.

"Just your back pack, honey. They will give you everything you need at the Center," Sam replied while packing her laptop into its carrying case. "Andy, are you ready for school?"

"Yeah, Mom. Can I help Dad get on his bus?"

"Yes, you can help Dad get on his bus if yours doesn't get here first," Sam answered, then glanced down at her watch. “We need to get outside because both of your buses will be pulling up in a few minutes."

"But, Sam, my bag is full!" Jack exclaimed as he held up his empty backpack.

"Jack your bag is empty. Remember I told you a few minutes ago that you will get all of your stuff at the Center," Sam said, then rubbed her hand lovingly across his cheek.

"Oh, okay. Luvs ya, Sammy."

"I love you too, Jack. Now let's get going so you guys don't miss your buses."

Sam slung her laptop bag over her shoulder, then zipped up Jack's back pack and hung it on the back of his wheelchair. After quickly running through her check list, she pushed Jack's wheelchair out into the crisp winter morning followed by their son. She found herself thankful that despite the chilly morning, there was no snow on the ground because it made it hard to get Jack's wheelchair around. Just as they got to the end of the driveway, the handicapped bus for the rehab center pulled up with the school bus right behind it.

"Andy, go ahead and get on your bus and I'll help your Dad," Sam said.

"Since my bus can't get around Dad's, can I help him first?" Andy requested, putting on his best pouting face.

"Okay, you can help your Dad, but, as soon as he's on his bus you get on yours."

"Okay, Mom. Thanks," Andy said excitedly as the bus driver put down the wheelchair lift.

Andy walked along side Jack's wheelchair as Sam pushed up to the bus and despite her worry over how Jack would handle going to the Center, the sight of her son walking proudly by his dad made her smile.

"Bye, Andy. Bye, Sam," Jack called out after his wheelchair was secured to the lift and was being raised into the van.

"Bye, Daddy. Have a good day at school!" Andy replied, his hand waving.

Sam gave Andy a hug and kiss goodbye before she shooed him to his bus when Jack's pulled away. She stood there and watched the two buses leave before getting in her car to go to the Mountain. A feeling of emptiness washed over her when she turned the ignition of the car. She was glad that she wasn't scheduled to go off world today and that she would be home before they would be.

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Jack stared nervously out of the window of the bus as it made its way across town, and only once did he take the time to look at the other two occupants. He felt like crying because he was scared. The panic building inside of him was making his hands start to shake. This was his first time going anywhere without Sam with him, and it was already proving to be too much for him. He started to pick at the strap of his hockey helmet.

"You'll be okay. Don't worry none. They treat ya real good and it does help," the young man in the wheelchair next to him said to him. "My name's Jeff. What's your name?"

Jack just stared at him for a minute, unsure of what to do. He studied the proffered hand as though it was a snake that was going to bite him. In his head, he heard Sam's voice telling him to be good and make friends, so he slowly reached to shake Jeff's hand. "M-my n-n-name's J-J-Jack."

"Ha! Jeff and Jack. We'll make a good pair, eh? Maybe I will get ta be your therapy buddy."

"Hmmm."

"Like I said, the Center's a good place. It's hard sometimes, but it's worth it to get better. So, what happened to ya?" Jeff asked.

"I hurted my head. Gots drain bamage." Jack was surprised at how the strange guy had put him at ease.

"Me, too. I had an accident 'most a year ago. At least that's what they tell me. I still don't remember it. I got a lot better, but still gotsa way ta go yet."

By the time that Jeff finished talking, the bus was pulling into the driveway of the Oak Hill Rehabilitation Center and stopped in front of the large building. Jack's hands began to shake again when the aides got out and opened the door. He watched fearfully as they helped the others out of the bus, then readied to get him out next. He couldn't stop the tears that started to fall from his eyes or the whimpers that were escaping his mouth.

"Come on, Jack. Yous can go in with me," Jeff said as soon as Jack's wheelchair was on the sidewalk.

Jack was shaking so badly that he couldn't push his wheelchair and just as the panic began to build again, he felt his wheelchair start to move. He turned his head to see a young girl pushing him.

"See what I mean, Jack? They helps ya here," Jeff said with a smile as he propelled himself alongside of Jack.

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Andy walked down the hall of his school thinking about how his dad was doing at the Rehab Center and if his mom made it to work okay. With his mind elsewhere, he didn't see the school bully come up behind him until he was given a good push.

“Hey, Andy. Who was that retard you was helpin' on the short bus this mornin'?" the chubby, red-haired boy asked.

Andy turned and stared the boy dead square in the eyes, straightening his back proudly. "That was my dad and he ain't no retard!"

"Sure looked like one to me the way he was wearin' that dorky hat. I bet he wears diapers too," the bully said, sneering and thumbing at his friends.

"You take that back right now, Jason Krauss!" Andy yelled, pulling his fist back.

"Boys! What is going on here?" an older woman asked as she rushed in between the two boys.

"Sorry, Mrs. Cummings. He was makin' fun of my dad," Andy replied, shoving his hands deep into his pockets.

The teacher glared at the bully. "Is that true, Jason?"

"No, Ma'am," Jason replied, then sneered in Andy's direction.

"You liar! You were too!" Andy snapped.

"That will be enough! Both of you boys will sit in my classroom during recess today and if I hear any more, I'll make it the rest of the week. Is that understood?" Mrs. Cummings snapped.

"Yes, Mrs. Cummings," the boys answered in unison.

"Now I want the two of you to get into the classroom and get ready for class," Mrs. Cummings ordered as she pointed to the door of her classroom.

The kids did as they were instructed, but as soon as they were out of the teacher's sight, Jason gave Andy one last shove.

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That night at dinner Jack jabbered on about what he had to do at the rehab center. He went on and on about how they gave him a big notebook to keep track of things and how he had made a new friend on the bus. 

Although Andy hung on every word that his dad said, his mind was on what had happened in school. It made him happy to hear that his dad had a good day and that he was working so hard on getting better. He was angry about what Jason had said about his dad, though hurt might be a better word. It cut him to the core because his dad sacrificed himself repeatedly to save people and all they could do was make fun of him. Oh, it wasn't just Jason; Andy had heard others, adults, making fun of Jack. If only they knew exactly how his father got to be the way he was now. He wanted to scream it at them every time he heard them insult his father, but he couldn't.

By bedtime, Andy's mind was a hurricane of thoughts. He absentmindedly changed into his pajamas and crawled into bed. He no sooner covered up with the blankets that there was a knock at the door. "Come in," he called out, trying to clam himself down.

The door opened and Sam stepped into the room. "Wanna talk?"

"Not really," Andy replied quietly.

"Andy, something's wrong and I' d like it if you'd tell me," Sam said sweetly while sitting on the bed and rubbing Andy's back.

Andy rolled over so that his back was to Sam and stared at the wall. He desperately wanted to talk it out with his mom, but he was afraid of hurting her feelings too.

"Andy?"

"There was a kid in school making fun of Dad today." A lump formed in Andy's throat and he could no longer fight back the tears. "He called him a retard and said that he wears diapers right in front of everybody. I wanted to punch his lights out!"

Sam pulled Andy up into a hug, rubbing his back as he sobbed into her shoulder. “It's okay, honey. They don't know what happened to your dad and even if they did, they wouldn't understand. Besides, he was just trying to get at you. The best way to handle him is to ignore him."

"It was hard to. He kept pushing me and saying those mean things," Andy replied then pulled away. He took a tissue and dried his eyes.

"How about I call Mrs. Cummings tomorrow and have a talk with her about it?" Sam asked.

"I don't care, but, I think that she's pretty mad at me for today," he replied.

"I doubt it. I'll talk to her anyway. Just ignore him if he does it again, okay?"

"Yes, Mom. Can I go give Dad another hug?" Andy asked looking at her pleadingly.

"Sure, but, then it's off to bed."

Andy wrapped his arms around Sam, then jumped off of the bed and scurried out to the living room to give Jack another hug.


	25. Chapter 25

"Why I hafta go in here for?" Jack asked as Sam helped him out of the van and into his wheelchair.

"You need to see Dr. Ward to find out when he can put the plate in your head," Sam replied, giving Jack a loving pat on the shoulder before starting to push him toward the entrance.

"If he puts a plate in my head, then how will he eat off it?" Jack asked in a genuinely puzzled voice.

Sam couldn't help but snicker at the comment, then instantly felt guilty for laughing at him. A pang of sadness hit her because he honestly didn't understand the concept. "It's not that kind of plate, Jack. It's a special material to cover the hole in your skull."

"Oh, otay," Jack said with a shrug.

When they entered the office, Sam parked Jack's wheelchair near the window and walked over to the reception desk to sign him in. A few minutes later, a black-haired nurse walked over to them. "Hey, Jack. How are you today?" the nurse asked cheerfully.

"Dunno," Jack replied flatly, not even looking at her.

"He's a bit grumpy today, Millie. He wanted to go to day hospital," Sam explained.

"Aw. I'm sorry, Jack. Dr. Ward won't keep ya long," Millie patted Jack's shoulder then turned attention to Sam. "Can you take him back to exam room one?"

"Sure," Sam took the handles of his wheelchair and followed Millie down the hall to the exam room. She parked him beside the exam table and sat down in the chair. No sooner had she sat down, that there was a knock at the door.

The door opened to admit Dr. Ward carrying Jack's chart. "Hello, Jack. You're looking good today."

Jack only responded with a grunt. He was really doing his best to let everyone know that he didn't want to be here.

"How has he been doing at home?" Dr. Ward asked as he read over Jack's chart.

"Okay so far," Sam replied.

"No seizures or anything like that?"

"No, no seizures, but he's had a few headaches and a nausea episode after dinner last night."

"Great. Well, I got a look at the MRI you had done yesterday and everything looks good. All of the swelling is gone. I think that we can go ahead and put the plate in next week," Dr. Ward said. 

Jack's head snapped up and there was a horrified look on his face. Sam quickly reached over and grabbed his hand, rubbing it in a soothing way. “It's okay, Jack. It'll make you feel better," Sam comforted him.

"She's right, Jack. You'll have a bit of a headache for a few days and be in the hospital about a week, but, you'll be just fine," Dr. Ward added.

"I no wanna be hopitals agin. I jus gots out!" Jack shouted angrily, his tone causing a shocked expression to appear on Sam's face.

"Jack!" Sam scolded him and looked apologetically at Dr. Ward. "I'm sorry. This is the first time that he's acted out like this."

"Hey! I here ya know," Jack snapped at her.

"Yes, Jack, you are. I'm sorry that I talked like you weren't."

"I's sorries too, Sam. I jus'scared."

"I know you are, Jack, but, we'll take very good care of you. I promise," Dr. Ward added softly.

"Otay. Sill don't wanna do it," he said grumpily.

Dr. Ward gave Jack a gentle pat on the shoulder and looked up at Sam. "Just stop at the desk on your way out and they'll schedule the surgery."

"Okay. Thank you, Doctor," Sam responded with a smile.

They followed Dr. Ward out of the exam room and went over to the scheduling desk.

"Hey, Dee. We came to schedule Jack's surgery," Sam greeted the secretary.

"Okay. Let me look here to see when Dr. Ward can do it," Dee said, then started flipping through the appointment book. "How about next Wednesday at eight in the morning?"

"Sounds good," Sam replied.

"Have him at the hospital at six-thirty. Nothing to eat or drink after midnight," Dee stopped and reached over to pull a sheet of paper which she handed to Sam before continuing to speak, "Here is a pre-op instruction sheet. It has all of the details of the surgery and what to do beforehand."

"Thanks, Dee. Is that all?" Sam asked as she folded the paper and put it in her bag.

“Yep, that's it," Dee replied with a smile. “Have a good day, Jack."

"We go now?" Jack asked hopefully.

"Yes, Jack. We can go now," Sam responded lovingly and gave him a pat on the leg.

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Sam pulled the van into the grocery store parking lot, turned off the ignition and then got out. She took a deep breath of the crisp winter air while she unloaded Jack's wheelchair and readied it at his door. Andy hopped out and opened his dad's door so that he, too, could get out. Sam watched worriedly as Jack stepped out and held tight to the door as he took the few shaky steps to his wheelchair, scared that he would fall. The physical therapists had been working with him on walking over the past few weeks and despite the fact that he was getting better at it, his steps were still very shaky. She let out a sigh of relief when he was seated while Andy held the handles. Jack hadn't been needing the safety harness, but out of habit, she would go to buckle it and laugh at herself afterwards. She was proud of the progress that Jack had made and hoped that he would continue to get better, not for her sake, but for his. It broke her heart when she would see him struggle with mundane things like getting dressed and eating, things that able-bodied people took for granted.

"Sam, I have my... I have my," Jack's voice was strained and tears of frustration began to pour from his eyes. He swiped his hand across his face, seeming to give up on the struggle for the word he needed. "I buy book?"

"Yes, Jack. You have your money in your pouch and you have more than enough to buy a book," Sam told him as she attached his tray to the arm rests of the wheelchair.

"Can I help Dad get a book, Mom?" Andy asked excitedly.

Sam smiled. "You sure can and you can even get a book for yourself. My treat."

"Thanks, Mom!" Andy replied happily then his smile quickly faded. "Will you treat Dad to a book too?"

"Of course I'll treat Dad to a book, too. Now let's get inside before the store closes."

Andy gave her a puzzled look. "Mom, the store don't close until ten and its only six now."

Sam started toward the door pushing Jack's wheelchair. "I know that, but I want to get in where it's warm."

Andy laughed and walked by his parents into the store. "Mom, can I take Dad over and look at the books?"

"Go ahead, but, don't go anywhere else," Sam said as she pulled a cart loose from the corral.

"'kay, Mom," Andy chirped and took hold of the handles.

With Jack's help, Andy pushed the wheelchair to the other end of the store where the book shelves were and parked it near the section where the airplane books were kept. Jack pointed at a thick book on the shelf and Andy reached up to get it for him. He loved spending time with his dad and helping him to do things. With a smile, he looked at the shelf to find a book for himself to look at. They paged through their books and talked about what they saw in them. After a few minutes, Jack had decided on which book he wanted and with a shaky hand reached in his pouch to get his wallet. He dumped the money out on his tray and began to push it around. "Andy, c'n you help me?"

"Sure, Dad," Andy said as he helped his dad sort out his money, explaining what each piece of money was and what it was worth. With his attention occupied, he didn't notice that Jason Krauss was sneaking up behind him until he felt a sharp jab in his ribs.

"Hey, Andy, is this take a retard for a walk day?" the pudgy bully teased with a sneer.

"Don't talk about my dad like that!" Andy yelled.

"I'll talk about him anyway I want, shrimp. Besides, what's he gonna do about it? Drool on me?" The boy's face turned red as he laughed at himself, causing the freckles on his face to stand out like brown rust spots on a steel pipe.

That did it! Andy pulled his fist back and popped the boy right in the nose, causing blood to immediately pour from both nostrils. He knew it was wrong, but he couldn't help the smile of relief that spread across his lips as Jason ran, crying and holding his bloodied nose.

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Sam put the bag of carrots in the front her of her cart and began walking down the cereal aisle when she heard raised voices coming from the book section of the store.

"Jack!" Sam gasped as she tightened her grip on the cart handle and raced over to the books.

She got there to see a woman coming down the other end of the aisle, yelling at Andy. Jack was sitting there, shaking and crying.

"What's going on here?" Sam asked as she pulled the cart up beside Jack's wheelchair. "Who are you and why are you yelling at my son?"

"Your son punched my son in the nose and made it bleed!" The woman screamed in Sam's face.

"Andy, did you hit this boy?" Sam asked as she rubbed Jack's shoulder comfortingly.

"Yeah, but, he was making fun of Dad again," Andy replied.

"I was not!" Jason protested.

"You were too!" Andy snapped back then looked at Sam. "Mom, he called Dad a retard again. He said that he could do it because the worse thing that Dad could do back was drool on him."

"You need to get your son under control, lady! He should be put in jail and that man should be in an institution where he can be properly cared for!" The angry woman shouted.

A horrified expression spread across Jack's face and tears sprang into his eyes. Sam looked down at him and felt her face get hot as the rage flared inside of her. How dare that woman say that to her, when her son was a bully that needed a good spanking himself? She closed her eyes and took a few deeps breaths, trying to calm herself so that she didn't slug that woman too. 

"You are a fine one to be talking! At least my son has more manners than to sit and bully others, especially a disabled adult, a man that was hurt fighting so that people like you could have the freedom to shop in this store!" Sam barked as she grabbed the handles of Jack's wheelchair and turned him around. "And my husband is well taken care of where he is, thank you very much! If anyone should be put in an institution it should be you and that son of yours!"

Sam stormed down the aisle with Andy following closely behind her with their cart. She felt terrible for talking that way to someone, especially out in public and in front of Andy, but she had to admit the release had felt good. They weren't the first to make fun of Jack and she didn't think that they'd be the last either. As she listened to Jack's sobs, she wondered how people could be so cruel.

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After Sam had got Jack and Andy into bed that night, she sat on the couch, sipping a cup of tea and looking out over the backyard through the glass patio door thinking about the events of the day. When they got home, she had a talk with Jack and Andy about what had happened at the store. They worked out better ways to deal with it, should it happen again. Much to her relief, Jack had seemed to shake it off by the time they had gotten back home, at least she hoped that he did. After dinner, they had sat around the table and looked at the books that they had gotten at the store. It was the perfect way to relax after the whole grocery store fiasco.

She took the last drink of her tea and stood up. As she walked to the kitchen sink, a big yawn escaped her. She was physically and mentally tired so she decided to go to bed. Making sure that everything was turned off and the doors were locked, she made her way down the dark hallway to their bedroom. The bedroom was quiet except for Jack's breathy snores and the tick of the wall clock. She climbed under the covers and gave Jack a gentle kiss on the cheek before snuggling in close to him.

"Sam?" Jack's quiet voice broke the silence of the room.

"Yes, it's me, Jack. Go on back to sleep," Sam said softly as she rubbed his arm.

"Is I a retard like dat boy said?"

Jack's words slammed into Sam's chest like a ton of bricks, the hope that he had forgotten the incident shattered. Tears welled up into her eyes. "No, Jack, you aren't a retard," Sam's voice cracked as she tried not to let Jack know that she was crying.

"Then why ain't I 'mart?"

"You are smart, Jack. You were hurt really badly and it's going to take time for you to get better, is all."

"Otay, Sam. If ya say so."

"I do."

"Day, Sam. Luvs ya."

"Good night, Jack. I love you, too."

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Jack's arms shook as he gripped the parallel bars, dragging his legs along underneath himself like a toddler starting to walk. He smiled when he made it to the end and slowly turned around to go back. His therapist, Harry Davidson, had said that very soon he would be able to ditch the wheelchair and move on to a rolling walker. Even though he didn't have a clue what a rolling walker was, the concept of getting out of the wheelchair made him feel fit to burst with excitement.

"Great job, Jack. You feel up to going one more time?" Harry asked.

"Yeah!" Jack replied enthusiastically and turned to go once more. He was proud of himself and he couldn't wait to write his accomplishment down in his journal. Most of all, he couldn't wait until he could walk on his own.

When his session was over, Harry had taken him down to the eating area for lunch. Jack rolled up to his usual table and waited for Jeff to come. He began to get nervous when he looked around the dining hall and noticed that he was the only one there. Had Harry brought him at the wrong time? Just as that thought flicked through his mind, all of the other patients and therapists came in the dining hall. They had a big sheet cake, presents, balloons, and other treats on a cart.

"We havin' a 'Good luck with your surgery' party for ya, Jack!" Jeff said excitedly as the group surrounded the table.

Jack didn't know how to react, so he just smiled as he looked over the cart with gifts on it.

"He's right, Jack. It's a party just for you," Jill, the Center's director told him cheerfully. "After everyone is finished eating, we'll have cake and you can open your presents."

"Thanks!" Jack said with a big smile on his face. He didn't know what he was more excited for, the cake or the party.

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That afternoon, when Jack's bus came, Sam's jaw nearly dropped to the ground when they opened the bus door and she saw all of the stuff inside. After the aide had helped Jack get off of the bus, the driver gotten out and began unloading the gifts and balloons from Jack's party at the Center.

"They haded a party for me!" Jack told her excitedly.

"We had a party to wish him luck on his surgery and a speedy recovery," the aide told her, his arms loaded down with gifts.

"I can see that. You can just put that inside of the front door," Sam told that aide that had the box with the remainder of Jack's cake in it.

Sam was touched by the kindness that the people at the Center had shown Jack and was grateful for it. The smile stayed on her face as she helped them carry Jack's loot into the house and waved goodbye to them when they left. It saddened her that tomorrow morning, Jack would be going back under the knife, but it scared her even more.


	26. Chapter 26

The nurse led the way down the hall to the temporary room with Sam pushing Jack's wheelchair behind her. Sam was nervous about the surgery, but tried to keep it in so that she didn't upset Jack. No matter how hard she tried to stop the worry, it came. The memory of how this all started would come flooding back and she would start to shake. She was terrified to lose him after all that he had survived. Her breath caught in her throat when they entered the little room and she saw the gurney there with a neatly folded hospital gown laying on top of the sheet.

"Just have him change into this and get into bed. You can park his wheelchair over in the corner and when he's taken into surgery one of the orderlies will take it up stairs to his room," the older nurse said in a calm voice and started toward the door, stopping and turning back to Sam. "When he's changed and in bed, just push the call button and I'll be back to start the preparations."

"Okay, thank you," Sam replied before the nurse left the room. Sam turned around and picked the gown up off of the bed. "Okay, Jack, let's get you into this."

"I no wanna take my clothes on!" Jack pouted.

"Jack, honey, you have to. Now come on."

Sam braced for the fight she thought was coming. Jack was tired and when he was tired, to say he was uncooperative was an understatement, but, the fight didn't come. Instead, Jack stood on his shaky legs, holding tightly to the bed for support. Sam helped him to get into the gown and he did his best to help. He was getting better at doing such things as dressing and best of all, walking.

"Looky, Sam. My ass is 'ticking out!" Jack said proudly with a big smile on his face.

Sam couldn't help but laugh seeing Jack standing there with that grin on his face and his comment about his bare ass showing was too much. She helped him into bed and when he was covered up, she pushed the call button for the nurse to come back. She sat down on the chair by his bed and rubbed his leg for a few minutes until the nurse came back. Jack grabbed her hand tightly when the nurse entered accompanied by another nurse pushing a cart with various supplies on it.

"I'm going to start his IV and then we are going to shave the side of his head for the surgery," the nurse said as she picked up a package containing the IV kit.

"No!" Jack yelled, tightening his grip on Sam's hand.

"Jack. You have to," Sam comforted him.

"No! Dey eider shave it all or none. I no want spald bots on my head on top of da plate!"

"Okay. Okay. We'll shave your whole head," the nurse said sweetly in effort to calm Jack. "My name is Carla. May I call you Jack?"

"Only if ya non't give me any neenles," Jack said with a pouty look on his face.

"I have to give ya the IV, but not because I want to," Carla replied and smiled at Jack. "Can I still call you Jack?"

Jack gave her a little glare. "Otay."

"Okay, Jack. I'm just gonna rub this cold cotton ball over your hand and then I'll put the needle in. I'll try to make it not hurt."

Jack's grip on Sam's hand quickly turned into a death grip, she bit her lip to keep the groan of pain quiet. She was glad that the nurse kept her word and made inserting his IV as quick and painless as possible. When it came time to shave him, Sam gave him a pat on the leg and stepped back out of the way. Sam nervously fiddled with the hem of her jacket as she watched them wrap a cape around Jack's shoulders before starting to shave his head. They worked quick and easy, talking calmly to Jack the entire time. Within minutes, Jack was completely bald and rubbing his head as if trying to figure out what happened to his hair. After giving Jack a shot in his IV and putting a nasal cannula on him, the nurses left the room. Sam retook her seat and held Jack's hand, waiting for the sedative to take effect. Then it would be time for him to go into surgery and Sam's long wait to begin.

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Sam sat on a chair in the surgery waiting room, wondering how Andy was doing in school and worrying about Jack. She tried to occupy her mind by watching a game show on the television that hung on the wall, but it was useless. Her heart felt like it stopped beating when the door opened and a nurse came in.

"Mrs. O'Neill?" the nurse asked in a quiet voice.

Oh, God! Here it comes... the 'I'm sorry, but your husband died' speech. Wasn't it the doctor's job to do that? "Yes?" Sam choked out the words, her throat feeling like it was swelling closed.

"Dr. Ward asked me to bring you back to the recovery room."

"Is Jack okay?" she asked anxiously.

"Yes, he's fine. He woke up a few minutes ago and was asking for you. When Dr. Ward told him that you weren't there, he started getting upset, so Dr. Ward asked me to come and take you to him so he'll settle down. Follow me, please," the nurse requested.

Sam breathed a sigh of relief and let the tears flow as she followed the nurse back to where Jack was. She was glad that he was okay, but it broke her heart that he got upset that she wasn't there. It felt like she had abandoned him when he needed her though she knew that it was out of her control. 

At the end of the hall, they walked through a set of double doors labeled with a red sign reading ' Recovery'. The room was like a long hallway with small curtained off cubicles lining the right side. The smell of antiseptic and anesthetic hung heavily in the air along with the beeping of heart monitors. The nurse guided her to the last cubicle and pulled the curtain aside. Sam stepped around the curtain to see Jack laying on the gurney, bright white bandages wrapped around his head, the right side of his face slightly swollen from the surgery. The oxygen hissed from the cannula under his nose and the heart monitor attached to him beeped a comforting tempo. His face brightened when he looked over and saw Sam standing beside him.

"Jack?" Sam kept her voice low so as not to bother the headache she was sure that he had.

"Shaaamm!" Jack's voice was slurred, he weakly flexed his fingers as if to try and grab her hand. Tears were still streaming down his face.

"Don't cry, Jack. I'm here now and I promise not to leave you again."

"Was skeered," he whispered, his eyelids getting heavier.

"I'm sorry, Jack. Go back to sleep," Sam comforted, rubbing gentle circles on the back of his hand.

Jack finally gave in to the residual pull of the drugs and let his eyes close while Sam continued to rub his hand. She relished the feel of the warmth of his skin.

"Hello, Sam," Dr. Ward greeted as he stepped past the privacy curtain.

"Dr. Ward."

"He did great. We got the plate in okay and there were no problems, until he woke up that is."

Sam nodded. "The nurse said that he got pretty upset."

"Yes, he did. I told them to go and get you before he got too bad, but, he seems alright now."

"He fell asleep right after I came in," Sam noted.

"He'll do a lot of that the rest of today. They'll be in a few minutes to take him upstairs to a room," the Doctor advised.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. I'll be in to see him later this evening. Take care now and relax. He'll be fine."

Sam smiled at the doctor and after he left, she turned her attention back to Jack. She took a tissue and wiped the little stream of drool that was running down his chin before drying the remains of his tears.

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Jack didn't stir again until about an hour after he had been taken to a room on the fifth floor’s neurology ward. His eyes slowly flicked open and began to scan the room for Sam, then widening brightly when he saw her on the chair at his bedside. They talked as he became more awake, though Jack fidgeted the whole time.

"Jack, what's the matter?" Sam asked as he squirmed for the fiftieth time since he woke up.

 

Jack shifted yet again and his left hand moved over his leg under the blanket. He had a bewildered look on his face when he turned his eyes up toward Sam. "Sammy, dey putted a big tube in my pee pee whiles I was sleepin'," Jack replied seriously, pointing to his groin area.

Sam was obviously taken aback by what Jack had just said. She bit down on her bottom lip and swallowed hard. She reached up and took his hand. "Jack, honey, they had to put the catheter in for the surgery."

"The surgeries is over. Why’s it ‘till there?" he asked confused.

"I'm sure they'll take it out soon. Don't worry about it," she said.

He made a face. "I don't likes it."

"I know you don't like it, but it has to be there for a while, okay?"

"Otay," Jack said sadly.

She gave him a smile. "Hey! Janet is going to bring Andy in to see you later."

Jack's face lit up and he smiled. He missed his son. "Good. I misses him."

Sam smiled again and lovingly rubbed Jack's hand, but the smile faded when Jack's face scrunched up.

"Jack, are you okay?" Sam asked him worriedly.

"Mine head hurts a little," Jack replied.

Sam reached up and hit the call button for a nurse. "Let's see if we can get you something to help with that."

"Can I help you?" a female voice asked through a speaker mounted above the head of Jack's bed.

"Yes. Jack said that his head hurts a little," Sam called back.

"I'll be right there," the nurse replied.

A few minutes later a matronly nurse came in Jack's room and injected something into his IV. She checked Jack's vitals and, after telling Sam to call if he needed anything else, she left the room. Jack's eyelids were already starting to slowly slide shut and by the time Sam got situated in her chair, he was sound asleep.

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The next morning, Janet stepped into Jack's room carrying a metal tray to find him asleep with Sam curled up in a chair with her head resting on his arm, their hands tightly clenched together as though they were afraid the other would disappear if they let go. She hated to disturb them, but she had to do Jack's exam and she knew that Jack would be happy to learn that he would lose a few of his 'extensions'. She made her way up to the bed and put her hand on Sam's shoulder, causing her to quickly straighten in her seat. "Sam?" Janet said in an apologetic voice when she saw Sam's shame-faced expression," I'm sorry to startle you, but it's that time."

Sam yawned and stretch a bit. "It's okay. I'm the one who should be sorry. I bet we looked like a pair of teenagers," Sam said as she let go of Jack's hand then stood up.

"Hey, it's okay. You guys are married so it's allowed," Janet teased, giving Sam a wink.

Jack opened his eyes at the loss of Sam's touch. "Sam?"

"I'm here, Jack. Janet's here to see you."

"Good morning, Jack. I'm here to do your check up," Janet replied softly, then smiled at the pouty look that formed on Jack's face. "Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you. Though you may be happy to hear that I can get rid of the IV and catheter." Janet chuckled a little when Jack's pouting expression rapidly turned into a beaming smile. She quickly set to work checking him over, making a few notes in Jack's chart as she did so. She felt Jack flinch when she undid the bandage to check the incision site. It looked good, the metal of the staples standing out starkly against the pinkness of the fresh incision. After the wound was re-bandaged, the doctor made a few more notes in Jack's chart and put the clipboard on Jack's over the bed table.

"Everything is looking real good. Your vitals are perfect and the incision is healing nicely," Janet informed them.

"Good. Nows can ya take dat tube out of my pee pee?" Jack said curtly as he stared at the doctor.

Sam gave Jack a stern look and a tap on the leg, Janet couldn't help but smile.

"Yes, Jack. I can take that tube out of your penis now, and as a bonus I'll take the needle out of your hand as well. Sound good?" Janet replied.

"Very!"

Janet gathered the supplies that she needed and put them on Jack's bedside table before donning a pair of rubber gloves. She pulled the privacy curtain around Jack's bed despite the fact that his door was closed. Jack tensed when she pulled his blankets down to just above his knees and lifted the bottom of his gown up, folding it slightly on his stomach. After placing a folded towel under his genitals, Janet put a needle in the port to deflate the balloon that held the catheter tube in place. She slowly pulled the plunger back until the syringe filled with the saline solution.

"Okay, Jack. I'm going to pull the tube out now. It's not going to hurt, but it may be a little bit uncomfortable. I need you to relax and take a few deeps breaths for me," Janet instructed him and readied her hands to pull the tube out. "Ready?"

A horrified look formed on Jack's face and he took a death grip on Sam's hand. Sam talked calmly to him in effort to get him to relax. After taking a few deep breaths, Jack nodded to Janet. In a swift, yet gentle motion Janet pulled the tube out and quickly wiped up a small stream of urine that leaked out. Jack flinched and let out a little whimper when the tube was removed, but smiled when he saw that it was out.

"Good job, Jack!" Janet praised with a smile as she tossed the catheter and urine bag into the trash then disposed of her gloves. "Now you want that needle out of your hand?"

"Yeah," Jack replied apprehensively.

Janet pulled Jack's gown back down then pulled his blankets back up over him. She put on a fresh pair of gloves and opened a paper pouch containing small gauze squares. Laying the gauze on the bed beside Jack, Janet began to pull the tape off of the IV catheter. She slowly slid the needle out of Jack's hand, quickly replacing it with a piece of gauze. After throwing the IV in the special trash can, Janet put a band-aide on his hand. "There you go, Jack. All done."

"Yay!" Jack exclaimed.

"Feel better now?" Sam asked him while she lovingly rubbed his arm.

"Yeah. I goes for a walk now?"

Janet smiled. "You sure can. I heard that you liked the standing walker that they had you use last night?"

Jack looked at Janet as though she had grown another head. It occurred to her that he no doubt didn't remember what had occurred the night before. He lifted a shaky hand up to his head and began to dig his knuckles into his forehead.

"Jack?" Sam asked, her voice strained with worry.

The words no sooner left Sam's mouth when Jack's body began to shake hard on the bed, the rails rattling with the force of his convulsing body. His long legs kicked out until the blankets were off of them and wedged in between them and the safety rail. A loud clunk followed by a crack rent the air as his foot slammed into the rail. Jack grunted loudly as a large wet spot formed then began to spread on the front of his gown as his bladder released. His hand flew up and swatted his hearing aid from his left ear, it landed on the floor near the window. After about a minute, Jack finally stilled and the seizure was over. Janet quickly began to check him over while Sam wiped the frothy drool from his mouth. Jack began to snore softly, totally unaware of Janet and Sam's ministrations.

"I want to take him down for x-rays after we get him cleaned up. I think he may have broken his foot. He hit that rail pretty hard," Janet said as she checked his pupil response.

"What brought that on?" Sam asked anxiously. No matter how many he had, each one scared her as badly as the first.

"It could be any number of things, but I think it was just one of his normal ones," Janet replied, then called for a nurse to come and help her clean Jack up.

After he washed up and a clean gown was put on him, he was taken for an x-ray of his foot. While he was gone, two orderlies came and changed the sheets on his bed. Sam walked to over to the window and bent down to pick up Jack's hearing aid that he had knocked off during the seizure. With the hearing aid cupped in her hand close to her heart, she looked out of the window and down at the people below. Anger began to flood into her. It wasn't fair! People hurrying about their lives, going here and there, walking and talking, things that she desperately wished that Jack could do without a struggle. Then the guilt hit. Here she was thinking about that when she should just be glad that he was alive, especially after what had just happened.

By the time they brought Jack back an hour later, Sam had calmed down. She sat by his bed and ran her fingers over his arm, talking quietly to him even though he was asleep. There was a light knock at the door, but she didn't turn around. The smell of Janet's floral perfume told her who it was.

"He has a minor break on his left big toe. It shouldn't interfere with his walking so long as he's careful," Janet informed her quietly and then gave Jack a quick check over. "I wrapped a bandage around it to remind him to be careful with it."

Sam stepped back out of the way, staring down at Jack's still form. When would he ever catch a break?


	27. Chapter 27

Sam hurried down the hall of the hospital to Jack's room. She had got delayed at the SGC looking at a modified naquadah generator and she wanted some alone time with Jack before Janet brought Andy in that evening. The delay made her a bit angry because she missed being with Jack during his physical therapy session and Jack was excited for her to see how hard he was working on walking. She stopped just outside of his door to catch her breath before she stepped into the room, freezing in her tracks at the sight that greeted her. Jack was fast asleep, laying on his left side with the blankets piled at his stocking feet. His right leg was bent at the knee and Jack's entire lower half was exposed in all its glory. With a quiet giggle, Sam rushed over to the bed and pulled the covers up over him, thankful that it was only her that walked in on that sight. Her actions caused Jack to stir, opening his sleepy eyes to look at her.

"Sammy, you come!" Jack exclaimed sleepily.

"Yes, Jack, I came. Sorry I'm late and that I missed your therapy," Sam replied before she gave Jack a kiss.

Jack slowly rolled onto his back and yawned. "It okay."

"How did it go?" she asked, sitting down in the chair at his bedside.

"Good. I used a wheely walker agin," Jack answered flatly.

Sam suddenly got the feeling that something was wrong with him, he just didn't seem as cheerful as he had been the last few days. She smiled and took a cheerful tone to her voice. "A wheely walker? Sounds cool."

"It is. Doc says dats what I use when I gets outta the wheelchair soon. Cn't wait."

Sam picked up Jack's journal to see if the therapist had made any notes about his session today and was glad to see that he had. The note said that Jack's balance had greatly improved and that he did great with the rolling walker. The best part was where it said that Jack was ready to start using one on a frequent basis as he felt comfortable. Sam smiled, Jack was making huge progress and quickly gaining independence.

"Sammy, you knows when I getta go home?" Jack asked sadly.

"No, honey, I don't, but, you can ask Janet when she brings Andy later."

"I'll forget cuz I stupid."

"Jack O'Neill! Don't you ever say that again. You are not stupid!" Sam said sternly, then instantly regretted it when she saw the shattered look on Jack's face and the tears that poured from his eyes. She got up and sat on the edge of his bed, wrapping her arms around him. “Oh, Jack, I'm so sorry."

Jack cried hard into Sam's shoulder, his bony frame shook with sobs. Sam rubbed his bare back where the gown had come untied, the guilt eating away at her thoughts. How could she yell at a brain-damaged person that way, especially her husband? It just broke her heart to hear him talk about himself in such a way. Ever since that night with the kid in the store, Jack had seemed to become more aware of his deficiencies and looked down on himself. The only thing that he hadn't become aware of was the amount of progress that he'd made and continued to make.

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Jack smiled broadly and dropped the peg that he was trying to wrestle into a hole when Andy skipped into his room. He was obviously happy to see his son and his occupational therapy session was obviously over. The therapist smiled at Andy and quickly gathered her things. After saying good bye to the father and son, she left.

“Andy!" Jack squealed and wrapped his arms around his son.

“Hi, Dad," Andy replied, returning his father’s hug.

“I gotted a plate in my head!" Jack told his son excitedly, apparently forgetting having already told his Andy about the plate. Suddenly Jack’s expression turned sad, “But, din’t gives me a fork wit’ it."

“Dad, Mom told ya that it wasn’t that kind of plate," Andy reminded his dad as politely as he could.

“Oh, yeah. Sorry. I forgetted."

“No need to be sorry, Dad," Andy comforted and gave his father another hug. “Hey, Aunt Janet said that you get to go home in two days!"

“Yeah. I wanna go home. I hate ho’pitals."

“Yeah, me too," Andy chuckled. “I brought some flash cards. Ya work on them with me?"

“Chure do!" Jack replied eagerly.

Andy pulled the box of money flashcards from his backpack and sat down at the table across from Jack. Jack still struggled with money values and counting it, but with Andy’s help, he continued to improve.

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Jack sat impatiently on his bed, tapping his fingers on his knee. He was waiting for Sam and Andy to come and bring him his clothes. Janet had told him that he was going to go home today and he wanted to go now. He let out an exaggerated groan when they finally arrived carrying a duffle bag. "Bout time! Janet said that’s I can goes home ‘smorning," Jack bristled.

“Sorry, Jack. I had to pick Andy up at school," Sam replied as she put the bag on the bed.

“I sorries, Sam. I jus’ wanna go home s’all."

Andy walked up to the bed and opened the duffle bag, taking out Jack’s clothes and sitting them neatly on the bed. “Here’s your clothes, Dad."

“T’anks, Andy," Jack looked timidly at Sam. “Can I dress myself?"

“Sure. I have to go to Janet’s office and sign some papers," Sam told him, then leaned over to kiss him on the cheek. “I’ll be back in a few minutes. If you need any help, yell for Andy."

“I’ll be right outside of your room. Okay, Dad?" Andy advised.

“Yep."

Jack waited until Sam and Andy were gone before he touched his clothes. He stood up, leaning against the bed for a little support, then reached up and untied the hospital gown letting it fall into a heap on the floor. A shiver shook his thin frame when the cool air hit his naked body as he picked up his boxer briefs. He sat on the edge of the bed to put his legs through the holes and stood to pull them up. It took him almost twenty minutes to get dressed, but he was proud that he did it all by himself. He grabbed ahold of his rolling walker and went to the door to call for Andy. A smile lit his face the whole way. It felt so good to be walking and not sitting in that damned wheelchair.

“Andy, you come in now. I’s done," Jack called out of the door after he opened it a crack.

Andy walked in the room and stopped, sadness overtaking his features when he took in his father’s appearance. Jack had put his sweatpants and t-shirt on backwards and his shoes were on the wrong feet. “Dad? Um, you got your clothes on wrong. Come over to your bed and I’ll help you get them on right."

“O’tay," Jack replied dejectedly, tears welling in his eyes.

“Don’t cry, Dad. It’s okay," Andy comforted.

Jack let Andy lead him over to the bed and help him get his clothes on the right way. By the time Sam and Janet came back, Jack was properly dressed and sitting on the bed with Andy at his side. After Janet gave him one last check over, she gave them his discharge instructions and prescriptions. Jack gave Janet a hug and said goodbye. He was ready to go home.

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Sam stood in the kitchen with a smile on her face and looked out into the living room, proudly watching Jack and Andy put the last of the decorations on the Christmas tree. Jack held onto his walker with his left hand for balance as he hung a brightly colored ball on the tree with his right. She was glad that he was happy and having fun, but mostly that he was alive. Goosebumps formed on her as the tears welled in her eyes, memories flooded into her mind of Jack lying near death in the ICU, the sounds of the machines as vivid as they were then. The loud buzz from the oven timer snapped her mind back to the present; she swiped the tears from her eyes and walked over to the oven.

Jack and Andy’s laughter could be heard in the kitchen as she removed the cookies from the oven and put them on the rack to cool. They had planned to decorate them as soon as the tree was finished. She still hadn’t determined what had excited Jack more, decorating the tree or the cookies, since he had literally squealed at the mention of both. A few minutes later, she watched as Andy put the last ornament on the tree and then put the empty ornament boxes behind the recliner. When she saw them start toward the kitchen, she acted like she was busy so they wouldn’t know that she had been watching; it was supposed to be their private time together.

“Mom, we’re done with the tree. Are the cookies ready yet?" Andy chirped excitedly as he burst into the kitchen with Jack hobbling in behind him.

“They’re not quite cool enough yet. Why don’t you and Dad go wash your hands while you wait?" Sam said as she lightly touched the cookies to test the temperature.

“Otay, Sam," Jack said and turned to go down the hallway toward the bathroom before he paused and turned to Sam, “No peekin’’ at da tree til we come backs."

Sam giggled. “Yes, Jack."

Sam continued to laugh as father and son walked down the hall and into the bathroom. She got the candy toppings from the kitchen cabinet over the sink and put them on the table beside the big bowl of icing, then started laying paper towels on the table. By the time she was done, Jack and Andy had returned from washing their hands and sat down at the table. For the next two hours, the three of them decorated the cookies and sampled a few.

“Okay, guys. Time for bed," Sam told them as she put the last cookie on the tray.

“But, Mom. I don’t want to go to bed yet," Andy whined.

“It time, Andy," Jack said as he stifled a yawn. “If we no go. We won’t get presents."

“Oh, alright," Andy gave in then he himself yawned widely.

“Andy, go get your pajamas on and I’ll be back in a few minutes to tuck you in," Sam said as she put the tray of cookies on the counter. “Jack, wait here and I’ll help you."

“I can do it myself," Jack proclaimed then pulled himself up from the chair. “I not a baby ya know!"

“Alright, go ahead back and get started. I’ll be there after I turn out the lights," Sam assented. She tried not to treat him like a baby, but she couldn’t help the worry that he’d get hurt or frustrated.

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At midnight Sam woke up and easily got out of bed so she didn’t wake Jack. Putting her robe on, she slowly made her way through the dark house to the living room. She turned the lamp on near the fireplace, then slipped on her shoes and went into the garage to get the presents. It was cold outside and in the garage, so she grabbed an old trolley cart to load the presents on so she could get them all in one trip. She was glad that she had decided to keep the bigger ones in the crawl space in the basement. When the last gifts were loaded, she hurried back into the nice, warm house. The trolley wheels screeched as she pushed it into the house causing her stop. After listening to make sure that Jack and Andy was still asleep, she pushed the cart into the living room and started putting the gifts under the tree. All of a sudden, loud, piercing screams rent the air and Sam went running knowing the screams were Jack’s.

“Jack!" Sam called out as she entered the bedroom to find Jack thrashing and screaming in the bed. She crawled onto the bed and took Jack into her arms, not noticing that Andy had followed her and was standing in the doorway. “Jack, honey. What’s wrong?"

“Da f-f-f-fatttttt m-m-m-ma-a-an ist hu-hu-hurting m-m-me!" Jack stuttered out through the sobs.

“What? What fat man?" Sam asked flustered and then realization hit. Aceaus! Jack was remembering what happened on the planet and it made it feel like her heart had shattered into a million pieces. “Oh, Jack. It’s okay. The fat man isn’t here. You’re just having a nightmare."

“He-he hitted m-m-me ha-ha-hard. It sill hurts. Sammy it hurts!" Jack cried, trembling and sobbing. Big tears poured down his cheeks and dripped from his chin onto his t-shirt that was already soaked with sweat.

“Mom, is Dad okay?" Andy asked timidly from the door.

“Yes, sweetie, Dad’s okay. He just had a nightmare is all. Go on back to bed," Sam said as she rubbed Jack’s back.

“Okay," Andy replied sadly. He turned to go back to his room and stopped, turning around to speak again, “Give him his dog. Sometimes that helps."

“I will. Thanks. Good night and I love you."

“Love you, too, Mom," Andy said, then went back to his room reluctantly.

With one arm still around Jack, Sam rifled through the blankets until she found Jack’s stuffed dog and gave it to him. He wrapped his arm around it and pulled it tight to his chest; his thin frame shook hard with sobs. It was tearing Sam apart hearing him whimpering and sobbing, but the thought of him remembering what had happened to him on planet hurt even more. She’d hoped that he’d never remember those horrible events. She held him tight to her, rocking him softly and rubbing his back in effort to calm him.

An hour later he finally stopped crying, but he was wide awake and still trembling like a flower caught in a strong wind. Sam reached over and grabbed a tissue from the night stand, sitting him up straight so that she could wipe his nose. “Do you want to come to the kitchen and I’ll make you a nice cup of tea? It might help you fall back to sleep," Sam asked as she wiped the tears from Jack’s cheeks.

“O-o-kay, Sa-am," Jack sobbed.

Sam pulled his walker close to the bed and helped him stand up. He put his stuffed dog into the basket that hung from the front of the walker before he gripped the handles and followed Sam to the kitchen. He sat down at the table without a word, only the sound of his sobs could be heard. His eyes, still red and swollen from crying, remained fixed on a spot on the floor and his face was drawn into a sad expression. The only movement he made was to grab his dog out of his basket and hold it to his chest as he had done in the bedroom.

“Are you ready for Christmas, Jack?" Sam asked as she turned the kettle on to boil. Jack didn’t reply, so she sat down at the table across from him and took a hold of his hand. “Jack, honey? It was just a bad dream. No one is going to hurt you."

“Did it hap’n?" Jack asked in a voice so quiet that Sam barely heard him.

“Yes, Jack, it did. It was a few months ago," Sam choked the words out.

“Is dat how I gots drain bamage?"

“Yes, that’s how your brain got damaged."

“Why he do dat to me? What I do to him?" Jack asked, finally lifting his eyes up to look at Sam.

“He was a cruel man, Jack. He hurt you because I tried to stop someone from hurting a girl. Oh, God, Jack. I’m sorry. It was all my fault," Sam said barely getting the words out before she too burst into tears. She laid her head on her arm that was holding Jack’s hand.

Jack reached over and laid his hand on her head. “You din’t hurt me, Sam."

Sam raised her head and looked at Jack. “No, but it happened because of me. If I had listened to you that day and left, he wouldn’t have hurt you. You wouldn’t have to struggle with everything."

“It otay, Sammy. I doin’ otay."

Sam couldn’t help but smile. He had the nightmare and the flood of horrible memories, but he was comforting her. One thing that hadn’t changed and never would was Jack always putting everyone before himself.

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Christmas day came bright and sunny, Andy came running into the room to wake his parents and they all went to the living room to open presents. Jack sat down on the couch beside Sam and waited while Andy passed out the gifts. He didn’t notice Sam reaching down and get a Santa hat from the side pocket of the couch and gently put it on him, careful of the still healing scar on his head from the surgery. The two smiled at each other, then kissed, wrapping their arms around each other in a loving embrace. When all of the gifts were given out, the family counted to three then began ripping the presents open.

At noon the doorbell rang and Andy opened the front door to find their extended family standing on the porch laded with presents and treats. George, Teal’c, Janet, Daniel, and Cassie entered the home. After exchanging hugs and Christmas wishes, the group went to the living room to exchange gifts. It was a very happy holiday for more than one reason.


	28. Chapter 28

Sam hurried around her lab, putting things away and packing her briefcase for home. She was running late and it seemed that the faster she moved, the further behind she got. Today was a big day. Not only was it Valentine’s Day, but today Jack graduated from the day hospital program. Finally, she shoved the final file folder into her briefcase and picked it up. On her way to the door the phone on her desk started ringing, with an irritated huff she turned around to answer it. “Hello?"

“Sam?"

“Oh, hey, Janet. I was just getting ready to leave."

“That’s why I was calling, to see if you left yet. Since you’re running late, Daniel and I will pick up Andy from school. General Hammond is going to give Teal’c a ride. So, all you have to worry about is getting yourself there."

“Thank you so much. I still have to go home, change, and then stop at the bakery to pick up the cookies."

“Just take your time. The last thing we need is for you to have an accident."

“I will."

“Well, I’ll let you go. Drive safe."

“Bye, Janet."

Sam hung the phone and beat a hasty retreat from the SGC before something else came up.

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The auditorium of the Oak Rehabilitation Hospital was decorated with red and white crepe paper streamers and bunting. Bunches of red and white balloons occupied various points around the large room. Nearly all of the five hundred seats were filled with the family and friends of the graduates, all chattering proudly about the person they came to see. Sam and Andy, along with Daniel, Janet, Cassie, George, and Teal’c, sat in the second row of the middle grouping of seats, waiting for Jack’s class to enter the auditorium. Sam made one last check with Daniel that the video camera was ready and that her digital camera had fresh batteries just as the music started playing to announce the arrival of the graduates.

Tears formed in Sam’s eyes when she saw Jack enter the auditorium dressed in a white cap and gown, his walker festooned with streamers. Everyone remained standing until Jack’s class was situated into four rows, with eleven people in each row, on the stage out of respect for them and the hard work they did to make it to this day. When the class was situated and the audience had retaken their seat the director of the rehab center walked to the podium.

“Good afternoon, everyone and welcome to Oak Hill. Today we have forty-four men and women graduating from the Oak Hill Rehabilitation Traumatic Brain Injury Day Program. Over the past two and a half months, the forty-four people that you see sitting on this stage have worked exceptionally hard to get to this day. We are extremely proud of them as I am sure that you, their family and friends, are as well. I know the students are anxious for the ceremony so without further ado, we’ll begin."

The first row of students walked and rolled in line, approaching the podium as their name was called and returned to their place on the stage. Jack was in the fourth row and would be the last to get his name called. Sam felt sad about that, but the sight of him sitting there made her heart swell with pride. As each name was called, cheers erupted from the audience, whether they knew the person or not. Sam’s heart fluttered when Jack’s row made their way to the front of the stage and he looked over in her direction with a smile on his face. Sam and Andy scooted to the edges of their seats when the man’s name in front of Jack was called.

“Now, last but certainly not least. This man was voted by the rest of the class and the staff as the valedictorian of the class for his determination. He made the most progress and accomplished every goal that had been set for him plus some. He refused to accept it when he was told that he would never walk again and in that refusal, made it happen. At the beginning of December, he had surgery to replace the bone flap in his head and missed two weeks of classes, but when he came back, he more than made up that time. Ladies and gentleman, I present to you our valedictorian, Jack O’Neill."

The audience and graduates erupted into a roar of cheers and applause. Jack looked shocked as he slowly made his way to the podium to accept his completion diploma. The director placed a red silk sash around Jack’s neck and Jack’s case manager gave him a small trophy that had a golden walker sitting atop a wooden pedestal. The director gave Jack his diploma and after Jack had put it and his trophy in the basket of his walker, Jack shook the man’s hand. Sam handed her camera to Cassie to take pictures because she was crying too hard to take any, she was so proud of her husband. She smiled widely as Andy stood and shouted that that was his dad up there. Sam dried her tears as she watched Jack go back to his seat. When the cheering died down and the students quieted from talking to Jack, the director retook the podium to announce that the students would be meeting them in the main dining hall for a small after ceremony party.

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After the party, Sam and Andy walked with Jack to his classroom to get his belongings and to meet with his case manager. Jack sat down at his desk and looked around, tears dripping from his eyes.

“Are you okay, Jack?" Sam asked putting a hand on his shoulder.

“I gonna miss dem. Gonna miss here," Jack sniffed.

“You’ll get to see and talk to them, Jack. They all gave you their addresses and phone numbers."

“I’ll help you write them, Dad," Andy offered then gave his father a hug.

Jack opened his mouth to say something, but closed it when he saw his case manager come in.

“Hello, Jack. You did really well at graduation. I’m very proud of you," the black-haired woman said as she sat down at the desk beside Jack’s.

“Thanks, Betty," Jack responded sadly.

“Mrs. O’Neill, Andy. I wanted to meet with you about getting Jack into the vocational program that we offer here."

“What’s that?" Sam asked, intrigued.

“It’s a work re-entry program where Jack will be assigned a vocational rehabilitation counselor. They’ll test him and then help him get a job. Once he has a job, they will do weekly evaluations to see how he is doing with it and make adjustments as needed. Arrangements will be made with the employer for Jack to get the necessary breaks that he requires and time off to go to physical therapy. They’ll also take care of getting him the supportive services that he needs."

“I get a job?" Jack asked apprehensively.

“Yes, Jack, you’re going to get a job," the case manager said smiling.

“Cool!" Jack exclaimed.

“I’ve also started to get his at home physical therapy set up as well. One of the therapists will be in touch with you sometime next week."

“Thank you," Sam said then smiled.

“Well, if you don’t have any more questions, I’ll let you get on your way. Congratulations, Jack."

After saying good bye, Betty left the family alone. Andy helped Jack put the rest of his stuff into his backpack before they too left. On their way out Sam thought of the romantic dinner that she had planned to have with Jack that night. Andy was going to spend the weekend with Janet, so she was going to have the whole weekend alone with her husband. Then her thoughts shifted to Jack’s getting a job, and she couldn’t help but wonder. Could it be possible for him to get a job at the SGC?

 

The End


End file.
